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(18 Posts)
pochontis Sat 04-Feb-17 07:39:10

Hi
This is my first time I am currently trying to conceive I am 47 I am concerned about the health of the baby if I am lucky enough to have a baby this late
Can anyone help have you had a pregnancy later in life was it ok as the internet doctors say you shouldn't do it
My doctor says have a go just stay as healthy as possible
Help please

Cutesbabasmummy Sat 04-Feb-17 20:32:47

You have a much higher risk of having a baby with chromosome abnormalities and it will probably tire you out more giving birth. The first few months on no sleep are hell! I was 39 when I had my now 2 year old son and my hubby was 43 and we have found it more tieing than friends in their late 20s earlier 30s.

pochontis Sun 05-Feb-17 21:50:38

There is so much information on birth defects I am not sure what to do

Cutesbabasmummy Sun 05-Feb-17 22:06:28

It depends on how much you want a child. Would you be willing to bring up a child wuth special needs? That's something you need to think about. Also have you had your fertility tested? At 47 you might have fallen off the cliff.

PacificDogwod Sun 05-Feb-17 22:15:26

Assuming that you can become pregnant, there is of course no arguing with biology - medical risks go up with maternal age - so, it all depends on how much you want to take these risks. If you don't make that leap of faith, you'll never know.
Otoh, if the stress of worrying and wondering would be too much for you, you might choose to NOT put yourself into that situation.

I am sorry, but I don't think that anybody can help you make this kind of a decision.
Yes, risks go up with age, but younger mothers can also have problems in their pregnancies.

I have a genetic abnormality myself which gave me a risk of 1:4 for certain trisomies (not age-related) and I had 4 healthy DCs between 37 and 44. I also had 4 MCs and it took 5 years to have the first successful pregnancy. Life was quite tough for a number of years. I know that some people I know and know me well (my mother being one of them) thought I (or rather we) were insane to take the risk we did. Repeatedly grin
I did have every diagnostic ante-natal test going and I would have terminated an affected pregnancy. I was sure of that at the time, and I am still sure, although very grateful I never actually had to make that decision.

1:4 risk of an affected child to me also meant a 3:4 chance of a healthy child smile
Maybe I should start gambling...

PacificDogwod Sun 05-Feb-17 22:19:11

Oh, and all my successful pregnancies were fine and dandy with good deliveries.
Sadly, my story means nothing for what might happen to you, nor do any bad stories mean anything for your chances.

This is entirely your decision, and your partners if you have one.

V best of luck thanks

imjessie Sun 05-Feb-17 22:22:35

Just be aware that not all genetic issues can be picked up during pregnancy .

PacificDogwod Sun 05-Feb-17 22:27:55

Yes, v true.

And many problems in pregnancy of older mothers are not genetic to start off with, for instance placenta issues.

bananafish81 Mon 06-Feb-17 08:04:08

Honestly, the chances of a natural conception, or an IVF baby with your own eggs, are miniscule

By 45 the chances of a natural conception are around 1%

The chances of a miscarriage are over 50%

The chances of a baby with a donor egg are excellent - it's like being in your 20s

I say this not to be cruel, but to provide some context

Fertility tests will show if you're ovulating and how your ovarian reserve is looking, they won't say anything about egg quality which is what counts. And unfortunately the best test of egg quality is age. Even at 30, only about 1 in 2 eggs are chromosomally normal. This goes down to less than 1-2% over the age of 45

The spate of celebrity women in their late 40s having babies creates a false picture of fertility. They are without doubt having donor egg conceived babies. Which is wonderful! They are having much longed for children and medical technology is enabling them to have happy, healthy babies who are deeply loved.

I wish you all the very best with your journey x

pochontis Sun 12-Feb-17 16:25:50

Hi thanks everyone I am going to just go with it if it happens it will be great if it doesn't we will live our life to the best we can
Thanks everyone

ggirl Sun 12-Feb-17 16:30:27

good luck OP

I had my son at 40
I did have pre-eclampsia ..after the birth (caesarean) but otherwise all went well

Rememberallball Sun 12-Feb-17 17:42:08

At 45, and with 2 years of ttc behind us, DH and I have accepted that DE ivf is like to be our only option if having our own child so we are now saving like mad to get the funding together for a cycle abroad.

I think you should be kind to yourself and positive while considering if there are other options out there for you that may help.

mummymummums Sun 12-Feb-17 17:48:14

I know someone who had a child at 47, wasn't trying but believed she'd gone through menopause. No abnormalities and 100% healthy. Not sure if that helps but it is positive

pochontis Thu 16-Feb-17 21:51:24

Thanks everyone smile

Welshmamma Fri 24-Feb-17 09:48:15

My nain had my mam at 43 and my auntie at 45 and they are healthy! She basically had children all of her reproductive life bless her x I hope I have her good ovaries 😁

pochontis Thu 24-Aug-17 06:53:43

Thanks everyone I have done Ivf I was successful but lost it at 8 weeks
I have been given clomid I'm on my last run at 150mg after this next cycle I'm giving up me a d my husband have a loving family around us with nephews and nieces thanks for all the support and advice x

TiramisuQueenoftheFaeries Thu 24-Aug-17 09:51:08

Nobody can give you firm answers and as PP say you will need to ask yourself the question of whether you could continue or terminate a pregnancy of a child with chromosomal abnormalities or disabilities - and bear in mind that these TFMR are often quite late in pregnancy (sometimes post 20 weeks) as not everything gets picked up until the 20 week scan.

The brutal truth at 47 is that you have a very low chance of conceiving with your own eggs, even with IVF, and your miscarriage chances are about 70-80% if you do. You will hear about women who conceived naturally and gave birth to healthy babies at this age, but the reason these stories get repeated is that they are the exception and not the rule, and almost invariably they are women with older children not women conceiving their first. As bananafish said the celebrities who give birth at this age are, without exception, using donor eggs from younger women.

It could happen for you - I hope it does - but I think it's helpful to have an understanding of the reality of the odds.

JoJoSM2 Thu 24-Aug-17 09:51:38

Very sorry about your loss. At least you'll know that you've tried.

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