Age reason enough to do IVF?

[SammyL100]

Hi Ladies,

I am 39 and had a mmc in November. I did concieve after 3 months *first pregnancy, but after the mmc at 12 weeks was distraught.

I am thinking of what help I can get and keep coming to IVF. But as I naturally concieved friends have told me its not for me. But my age feels like a timebomb so feel as though I need to get assistance. I have had an ultrasound which showed no issues and having day 21 blood tests.

I have booked into 2 IVF free open evenings but am scared I am going to be bombarded by salespeople first, doctors second.

Any advice?

[sarahnova69]

Unless you've left some stuff out you aren't infertile. Your obstetric history would still be perfectly healthy and normal for someone of 21. I get that you were devastated by your miscarriage, but do you really want to pay thousands for invasive, difficult, and high-stakes treatments there is no evidence you need? I mean, have you thought about what IVF actually involves? Giving yourself hormone injections, hyperstimulating your ovaries, having an invasive procedure to retrieve your eggs?

Why not just try again? You don't have problems conceiving and you have no reason to think your next pregnancy won't be successful. You're sort of going from 0 to 1000 in one step here.

[PurpleDaisies]

I totally agree with sarah, you're jumping the gun here. I don't think there's evidence that IVF improves the chance of a pregnancy if there aren't any issues. Perhaps make an appointment with your gp to discuss your options.

I'm so sorry for your loss-miscarriages are awful. Many women do go on to conceive without any problems after a miscarriage. Good luck to you.

[SammyL100]

I contacted a fertility helpline and the woman kept saying "time is not on your side" "time is not on your side" as if I didn't know!

I am panicking feeling as though I should be doing something. But thank you for your advice it seems to chime with my inner (more rational) thoughts.

[Ilovewillow]

I tried for 8 yrs to have a child then had various homeopathic options, iUI and finally IVF at 36 and again when I was 41 via FET. You don't sound as if conceiving is necessarily an issue at this stage, unless it were I really wouldn't consider it. Very unlikely you would get funding, it is expensive, but more than that emotionally and physically exhausting. There is nothing to say it is more likely to result in a successful pregnancy and if anything given the steps involved it is less likely. Please don't panic give yourself some time (you still have time).

I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriage. Please don't add to your stress with IVF unless you absolutely have to!

[sarahnova69]

I contacted a fertility helpline and the woman kept saying "time is not on your side" "time is not on your side" as if I didn't know!

Honey, all due respect, but you don't have any evidence that you have a fertility problem. There was really not much a helpline could do for you, which is why she probably fell back on a platitude. There's really nothing TO do at this stage. The fact that you conceived quickly is a good sign. Chances are high you will conceive again before long, especially as your fertility is usually higher for several months after a miscarriage. Miscarriages are so so so so so common and a single miscarriage doesn't mean anything. I know they are horrid in every way, I've had losses myself. But your anxiety is going into overdrive here and that isn't going to help you physically or mentally.

And as PurpleDaisies says, IVF probably wouldn't improve odds any. You can still have a miscarriage after conceiving through IVF. It's also no joke either financially or physically. It would be a massive overreaction at this stage.

Try to stay calm. The odds are very much in your favour. When you're ready, try again. You can also think about discussing both your fertility options and your anxiety with your GP. Good luck.

[MrsChrisPratt]

You got pregnant after 3 months, the brutal truth is very few clinics cam offer you a success rate greater than that through IVF.

IVF cycles take significantly longer (up to two months) than a normal cycle, so you would effectively be reducing your chances even further.

There is little that would be done in an initial cycle of IVF to protect against miscarriage (further options might be explored if you experienced recurrent miscarriage, but you can do this anyway without IVF).

Miscarriage is hideous (I've been there) but so is IVF (been there too, four times). Don't compound your suffering by undergoing incredibly invasive and unnecessary treatment which would likely make matters worse for you.

Try for 6 months and seek help if you aren't successful.

Good luck

[2014newme]

It took me five years and cost me £20k to have ivf babies. If times not on your side I would investigate it but it's by no means a quick or easy option.

[SammyL100]

Thank you for your advice. Really helped me. I suffer from anxiety which has gone into overdrive post mc. I think you all have answered the question burning in my mind and gave me the medicine I really needed!

Thank you all.

[Blondeshavemorefun]

Get your amh and fsh levels tested. This will help you a timescale with quality and quantity of eggs

Yes at 39 time isn't on your side but you did conceive naturally very quickly

Look into ivf - it is costly. Looking at £6k+ per cycle and if lucky maybe a few to freeze

Do you have that kind of money or can save /loans/credit cards etc as we did

5 private attempts and £27k later finally preg - I'm now 43. Was 33 when started ttc

Or you may get one embryos after blast and could fail

I would give it 6mths naturally but have all info for ivf to go so if not preg by summer naturally you start ivf

[Warpeddog]

Sounds like you're pretty fertile. I was 39 when I started ttc. Fell pregnant within 3 months and had an mmc. I was devastated. But.. I got pregnant again 3 months later and had a healthy boy. I hope that helps.