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Baby bomb

(5 Posts)
Whereland Tue 20-Dec-16 08:07:24

I know there's no eacaping them. I'm really good at acting really happy (and I usually am after a little bit of self pity!) but this one last night just has me numb.
A good friend who knows about my struggle (2 years ttc, not a sniff of a bfp) told me last night she's pregnant. It was punctuated with "I know this is hard but it will happen for you, just keep positive etc etc "insert usual useless phrases thrown at us infertiles". She knows I tried acupuncture for months, spent a fortune on it and just decided I couldn't spend any more on it when nothing was happening. She went on about her acupuncturist and how it was definitely what helped etc. Made me feel like it was my fault for not keeping it on for longer.
Anyway, I know this is totally my issue and there is no easy way to tell an infertile person that you're pregnant but I was just numb, sad, jealous and annoyed all night. I'm sure I'll be over it by the end of the day, just wanted to write it down..

FortyFacedFuckers Tue 20-Dec-16 08:57:44

I'm sorry OP I totally understand how you feel, 11 years TTC including numerous IVF's.
It's incredibly difficult when anyone announces a pregnancy. No advice but sometimes it helps when you know not everyone is getting pregnant at the drop of a hat xx

waitingimpatient Tue 20-Dec-16 11:38:37

I have dsis due in March and another two relatives due soon and it feels unbearably unfair sometimes , i find myself saying in my head "just get through today, don't be harsh on yourself" because I'm my own worst enemy thinkkngbif only I'd done this or that differently in the cycles etc

Mrscrabtree Tue 20-Dec-16 18:39:07

Whereland it is totally shit when that happens especially when you get unwanted "advice" on what you're "doing wrong". It's the absolute worst and you're definitely not being unreasonable by feeling like that.

I've taken to actually telling my friends in a calm and kind way "I know you are trying to help, and it's impossible for you to understand what this is like for me, but I don't want you to say ABC, I need you to say XYZ instead - I thought you'd rather I just tell you how I'd like to be supported". It's actually gone pretty well as my friends have been relieved that I am giving clear instructions. But I understand it might not be possible in all situations or with everyone, just an idea that has made me feel more in control.

Sending hugs fbiscuit

Whereland Tue 20-Dec-16 22:28:42

Thanks all.
Have just had another one this evening, a couple not married long. I don't know whether to laugh or cry!

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