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OH and alcohol

(31 Posts)
Bibs2014 Wed 17-Aug-16 20:56:22

Has anyone else's OH been told to cut out / cut back on alcohol before IVF?

spinduffy Wed 17-Aug-16 21:25:02

My clinic told us both to basically cut out alcohol whilst going through IVF. Looking at the research, it probably is even more important for the male than female.

RunRabbitRunRabbit Wed 17-Aug-16 21:28:36

Don't most people cut down when ttc anyway? Is it a problem for him?

LHReturns Wed 17-Aug-16 21:31:43

I was wondering about this too.

How far ahead of a cycle should the male cut out / cut down on booze? I need to be a little realistic with what I ask him to do - if I say no booze for a month before likely EC he would snigger. But two weeks is a possibility.

May I also ask what set of supplements or other 'rules' your DHs are signed up for? Limiting caffeine? Lots of protein? Lots of zinc?

If you were going to ask your DH to do just 5 things, what would they be?

Bibs2014 Wed 17-Aug-16 22:27:45

Runrabbit - no, not a major problem. I ask because we are going to go for IVF again. Last time we did it was 3 years ago and now have my DS. I've forgotten everything everything we did back then blush. It was such a stressful time, I think my mind has just blocked it all out! So I need 'refreshing' of the rules.

Bibs2014 Wed 17-Aug-16 22:29:39

Lhreturns - last time my DH was advised to stop drinking 3 months beforehand.

I think we took the Pregnacare / Wellman supplements.

Hoping others will be along soon to add more as I even threw away my Zita West book blush.

LHReturns Wed 17-Aug-16 22:47:07

Thanks Bibs, I rather thought that would be the case. 3 months seems to be the magic lead time for all IVF prep!

My husband has had three children (one with me), so he just isn't going to go alcohol free for three months because I asked him to. He doesn't drink a lot but he does drink (probably 14 units a week currently). If there is any sperm quality issues with our first fresh round then I will get our consultant to encourage him along.

Kr1stina Wed 17-Aug-16 22:54:16

He won't stop drinking for 3 months to help you conceive his baby ? What a selfish arse

Bibs2014 Wed 17-Aug-16 22:54:21

It takes 3 months for new sperm to be produced from what I remember...

Have our first appt with consultant in 6 weeks so trying to get healthy from now, although OH has had a really stressful day at work so is having some beer which is what made me ask the question initially.

LHReturns Thu 18-Aug-16 02:11:18

Kr1stina he isn't a selfish arse in any way at all. He is the most giving and generous man in the world who would do anything for me. He would give up drinking for three months if he knew I was truly convinced that it would make the difference in our particular, well tested case. So far I am not convinced it would make the blindest bit of difference (in our particular case). If that position were to change, and he knew this, then he would do anything to help me have my second child.

spinduffy Thu 18-Aug-16 07:44:11

I think 3 months is unnecessary, as long as he does not over do it and sticks with recommended national guidelines. I think alcohol free for stimms is more than enough and Alcohol limited before that! I hope he enjoyed his beer and he doesn't sound selfish at all.

Bibs2014 Thu 18-Aug-16 08:36:03

LH - I did a bit of reading up last night and it seems that even 4 drinks a week can have a detrimental effect.

It's not just about falling pregnant it relates to health of sperm and likelihood of miscarriage .

I def need to do more research so don't just take my word for it smile.

LHReturns Thu 18-Aug-16 08:56:58

Hi Bibs, there is no debate about it - what you have read is true. I'm not challenging the science at all.

I'm questioning whether at this stage (our first real try) keeping DH under 14 units a week is one of the most beneficial changes we can make. Every couple faces the challenge of IVF a little differently and I believe we all make our own unique decisions around what changes to make to maximise our own unique chance. And at the same time I want to keep a happy healthy marriage.

My DH and I are making lots of changes based in advice from our Lister consultant and our own research, and cutting his already moderate drinking down further isn't a change I feel is necessary at this particular moment. He knows this, and I resent people deciding my DH is a 'selfish arse' based on one sentence on a forum like Infertility where we all meant to be mutually supportive and kind to each other.

Kr1stina Thu 18-Aug-16 10:11:52

My husband has had three children (one with me), so he just isn't going to go alcohol free for three months because I asked him to

I expect that you will be going alcohol free for more that 3 months , while TTC and while pregnant ? But he won't. Even though it will cost him nothing, may improve his health and your chances of TTC.

And of course it woudl be supportive of you . So he's going to sit with his drink while you have a cup of tea ? Lovely .

I hope it works out for you.

Bibs2014 Thu 18-Aug-16 10:21:12

Hi LH - no judgement here, only support smile

Could you share the changes your consultant has advised, could help me grin

LHReturns Thu 18-Aug-16 10:43:47

I have not gone alcohol free for 3 months before starting IVF.

Absolutely Bibs - will share a separate list of changes we have made - but expect there won't be anything there you haven't seen before!

Bibs2014 Thu 18-Aug-16 11:02:59

I was more dedicated last time as I didn't have my son. Now we are going in with the attitude that of it works, it works; if it doesn't then we will focus on life with what we have already.

Please share your list! smile

Bibs2014 Thu 18-Aug-16 11:03:31

Also I don't think I went alcohol free last time. smile

sparechange Thu 18-Aug-16 11:04:53

We saw Dr Jonathan Ramsay, widely regarded as the leading urologist and sperm expert in Europe if not the world, and his opinion was that as long as you are staying within the recommended drinking guidance, it won't be having a detrimental effect on sperm.

When we mentioned this to our fertility clinic, they said something vague about 'eating, drinking and thinking like you are pregnant in the lead up to treatment', but didn't offer any evidence base for it.

Obviously it is great for you both to get as healthy as possible, but I wouldn't let a few drinks a week become a flashpoint for arguments in what is an already fraught time

BabooshkaKate Thu 18-Aug-16 11:06:06

Sperm takes 70 days to produce so that's why they say 3 months - so that he has had time to produce good quality sperm.

Bibs2014 Thu 18-Aug-16 12:20:33

Thanks Kate and Spare for the info.

You are right, it's such a fraught time and no guarantees it will work. The stress is unbelievable. Not being able to drink - or eat what you want, if that's the case - just feels like another thing this journey can take from you. Really hard!

LHReturns Thu 18-Aug-16 13:23:48

Bibs, when are you hoping to start? If all goes as planned I would be starting stims soon after the Bank Holiday weekend...

I need some buddies!

Bibs2014 Thu 18-Aug-16 22:19:11

First appt is 6 October. How about you, what stage are you at?

LHReturns Thu 18-Aug-16 22:35:59

Ok I should be starting a little bit sooner. As I am 40 and low AMH I will be on a short antagonist protocol. Meaning I do no down-regging, and just start on Day 2 of my period with a VERY high dose (450iu) of Gonal F. This probably doesn't produce as many eggs as a long protocol, but at least it is faster.

My next period is due over Bank Holiday weekend. So hope things happening soon.

So all fingers crossed if I am lucky enough to have any nice embryos we should be transferring by mid- September.

If no success then we hope to try again before Christmas....

I am excited and very nervous.

Do you hope to start ASAP after your first appointment?

Let's stay in contact!

Bibs2014 Sat 20-Aug-16 13:43:22

Good luck!

We are going to see what the consultant says when we go and see him. Hoping to get 6 healthy weeks in before we go and see what he says. Excited but nervous!

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