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Anyone else stuck in a shite job because of infertility/ivf?

(5 Posts)
AngelicaSchuyler Thu 16-Jun-16 20:39:10

Just another part of the colossal hideousness of infertility, isn't it?

Been ttc coming up to 4 years, endured 4 failed rounds of ivf last year (2 chemical pregnancies). Planning a 2nd laparoscopy for endo next month before hopefully going for ivf again in September.

I joined my current company when we'd only been ttc 6 months; it was close to home, there's a nursery on the same business park ('how useful for when I'm pregnant!' we laughed hmm).

3 years later I'm bored to tears, I feel like my career's gone backwards, the people I work with drive me up the wall and I feel hopelessly trapped. It wasn't so bad when it was relatively low stress but a couple of elements of the job have changed recently and the stress has rocketed, along with my anxiety levels.

I could have left numerous times and DH is v supportive, but my boss is understanding about the ivf and time off so I felt it would be silly to leave - 'maybe next time will work and then I can go on mat leave', etc.

All my friends are progressing in their careers or going off to have their babies, and I'm just stuck here with no progression (probably because my boss feels secure I'm not going anywhere so doesn't feel the need to promote me). I've decided if this next round doesn't work I'm going to draw a line under it and hand my notice in at the end of this year.

Anyone in a similar situation? xx

Teakind Thu 16-Jun-16 21:08:39

Yes I was thinking exactly the same thing today! It's incredibly frustrating. My boss is quite easy going about me disappearing to appointments (although I haven't told her what they are for) which is great and I'd worry about losing that flexibility. That being said, my career is definitely stuck and I've noticed a distinct lack of married women being promoted.

MrsChrisPratt Thu 16-Jun-16 21:11:49

I've been made redundant, starting my new job in 2 weeks. Just change your job. Life happens, shit happens. If you get pg you'll be happy regardless of the drama, and if you don't at least you won't be stuck in a shit job.

ellesbellesxxx Thu 16-Jun-16 21:14:06

I hear you!
I merrily stayed where I am, not applying for local jobs because Obviously there was no point moving when I would be upduffed ASAP!
I am now a couple of years on and luckily they are being v supportive as we start our IVF journey in next few weeks.
I have my dream career, working for myself, all lined up to fit around little ones but in the meantime I feel I deserve to get that mat pay! (Plus we need extra income for helping with IVF)

It's just another thing put on hold whilst we are in limbo isn't it?


AngelicaSchuyler Thu 16-Jun-16 21:31:45

Thanks for all your responses,

Reading back I realise my op was a ranty and 'poor me' - that wasn't my intention, I've had a bit of a pants day and needed to vent. Sorry to hear about you being made redundant MrsChrisPratt, hope you enjoy your new job.

Teakind good to hear your boss is flexible - the one thing I'm grateful for is that my boss is supportive as I don't know how I'd deal with all the clinic visits if i had to stress about sneaking out of the office.

ellesbelles best of luck with your ivf journey!

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