IVF with egg donation

[Snowball789]

I don't know if there is anyone out there who can understand what I'm going through right now, but I really need to explain how I feel to someone outside the situation. I'll try to be brief.

There is a family history of early menopause in my mother's family and when I was 34 and not in a relationship I asked my GP if there was a way of predicting if I would go through this too, as I was desperate to have a family but only when I was in a settled relationship. Long story short, I had a car crash of an appointment with a fertility specialist, received some poorly worded letters and a request from another hospital for part of my ovaries for medical research all of which gave me the impression that i was headed for early menopause. I met my husband when I was 36 and experienced night sweats for a whole year thought, 'thats that then' and believed that I was infertile.

I found out by chance this April that I have been fertile all along. I'm approaching 49 and we are looking at IVF via egg donation in Spain. Due to our remote location we can only do this via the original specialist. So I am sucking it up as I am deperate for a child. I have been through anger, wanting to sue etc but right now I just feel like someone has died. I know I have to concentrate on the IVF but I don't feel that I know enough about it and I can't help looking back and trying to piece together how this happened. I feel stupid and vulnerable and unbelieveably sad. How do I move forward?

[Pocket1]

Hi Snowball. Firstly wow, what a lot to have to get your head round. I feel for you.

I just wanted to say that at 46 DH and I fell pregnant through donor egg ivf - we now have the most beautiful DD. She is the centre of my world and totally and utterly mine as far as I'm concerned.

I have sometimes wondered why I didn't have children younger (when I assume I could have done so with my own eggs) but I never dwell on this for long. I can't change the past. And I wouldn't change the past, as I wouldn't have DD.

I don't want to dismiss what you've said but you are where you are. If it feels right, go for donor ivf. There every chance it will work. Good luck

[Taleggio]

What a nightmare! You poor thing.

We had 2 rounds of IVF with my eggs in UK, then one in Spain with egg donation which produced DS and 3 embryos in the freezer. We're going back next month to get one of the frozens put back in.

Hope your cycle goes well xx

[Snowball789]

Thank you both so much for you supportive posts, they really help. You're right Pocket, we are where we are and we have to get on on with it. It's helped to just write down how I feel and have someone care. Thanks both so so much and good luck Taleggio.