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Donor Sperm and Donor Eggs

(14 Posts)
Darkchoc Thu 02-Jul-15 15:58:02

As I am now pushing 42 with 2 failed IVF cycles behind me (devastating), I am seriously considering using donor eggs...far from ideal really, and particularly since I am already using donor sperm. The jump from donor sperm to using both donor sperm + donor eggs is such a wide mind jump, for a host of reasons. My AMH is just over 3 and statistically my chances of conception aren't great. I already have one beautiful child who is genetically mine.
TBH, if I had a second income (I am single) or greater financial resources, I'd keep trying with my own eggs as I am producing really good embryos - though of course they may not be implanting as they are deemed "old" but the fact is I don't have a big purse and I am trying to maximise my chances of simply having another healthy baby...hence the probable use of donor eggs from a younger woman.

So has anyone used both donor sperm and donor eggs? If so I'd really appreciate hearing your experiences, good, bad, indifferent. Did you stay in UK or did you travel overseas for treatment?

Thanks

18yearsoftrying Thu 02-Jul-15 19:32:49

My DD is both.

Years & years of treatment & as it was failing, time was going by & infertility was increasing (if that makes sense)

The waiting list in my area privately was min of 18 mths so we chose to go to a satellite clinic. They did all the scans here & we went over literally just for the transfer. The clinic was out of this world, doesn't compare to what we used to (despite being private) here.

They absolutely scrutinised & screened the donors for a hell of a lot more than here in the UK, we were surprised. DH preferred to go overseas as wasn't keen on the anonymity ban here.

This time last year we paid £9k for the one attempt, obviously had the flights etc to fund as well. The clinic had (may still have) something like a 92% success rate over 3 attempts. We struck lucky 1st time thank goodness given our history.

Took a long time for DH to accept he would bond/wouldn't reject. A lot of counselling. A counsellor had to 'approve' us for treatment.

I have never, ever looked at her & thought that she isn't ours. Even now talking about it, it doesn't feel like it's something I can relate to. DH & DD have an incredible bond, it is pure magic watching them together.

Bizarrely, I made a new friend recently who had IVF/ICSI (got chatting through dog walking) & it has just come to light that her DD is both too.

It didn't dawn on me that she was & I would never have known.

Darkchoc Fri 03-Jul-15 10:35:08

18years perhaps you ought to change your username to successful as you've just described a fabulous little family. Yes, it makes sense re: the longer we try, our fertility is declining. Sadly we can't halt the aging process or put our prime fertility on ice.

I can see why counselling is imperative with donor gametes. I've been through the round for donor sperm, but to throw donor eggs in there too is much more complex as it is the end of the genetic link, which for me is super important - as it is for most. I suppose once I go throw the whole grieving process, which is looking quite inevitable, it will seem much clearer. The bottom line of course, probably comes down to having a child or not having a child. And for me, I simply have an overwhelming need to complete my family asap.

I can completely understand your love and emotions for your DD, for being a mummy or a parent goes way beyond genetics.

That's a high success rate, are you able to mention the clinic, or if not on the board, p.m me the details?

18yearsoftrying Fri 03-Jul-15 11:09:44

I will PM you later xx

18yearsoftrying Fri 03-Jul-15 20:01:09

Pm'd you a few hours ago xx

Darkchoc Sat 04-Jul-15 19:40:33

Thank you so much xx

ck3295 Sun 05-Jul-15 08:10:31

18yearsoftrying This is the first time I have posted on here. I have a beautiful daughter that was conceived naturally who is now 5. Since then we have been ttc and have been through 6 rounds of ivf. Sperm quality not great but fine for ivf, but my ovarian reserve and egg quality not great (especially as I get older). I am desperate for another child and have been looking into donor eggs (husband not keen as he is worried about what to tell the child and others). Further complicated by the fact that I am ethnic minority so smaller pool of donors so think would need to look abroad.

I would be interested to know which clinic you used? Reading the thread sounds like you would prefer not to post on here, can you send another way as I said I am new on here! Thank you

18yearsoftrying Sun 05-Jul-15 12:58:02

CK and darkchoc I'll PM you both separately later today smileflowers

18yearsoftrying Sun 05-Jul-15 20:18:51

Done xx

sunshineonasunnyday Wed 08-Jul-15 18:15:03

Could you please PM details too.
I've just had my results today and been told that at 37 my FSH is 30, I'm in menopause and the only option is a donor egg. I never expected this result so never thought about egg donor. I have been recommended a clinic abroad by the private hospital I've been having tests at, but would love to get more recommendations. Thank you.

18yearsoftrying Wed 08-Jul-15 19:50:46

Have PM'd you x

JuliaV1971 Sat 11-Jul-15 10:55:59

Hi, I'd be really interested in which clinic you used. I'm 44 and considering DE too after a year of IVF ending in an ectopic. Thank you.

18yearsoftrying Mon 13-Jul-15 18:06:47

Sorry, have just seen your post - will PM you later x

18yearsoftrying Mon 13-Jul-15 21:26:27

All done x

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