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Anyone else in infertility testing limbo?

(65 Posts)
Moondreamer Fri 12-Jun-15 13:06:20

I am currently having tests to see why we might be struggling to get pregnant. Months pass in between each test and it just feels like time is going by and we're in limbo waiting for a diagnosis or for the Drs to decide we can have treatment. When read the ongoing threads here most are (understandably) about people having treatment and I just wish we're at that stage after 18 months of no luck and serious trying. Does anyone else feel like they're a bit stuck at a stage between people who are trying excitedly to get pregnant on the TTC boards and people who are having treatment? Obviously I hope we'll be able to have treatment in the future and can join in the chat (or get pregnant naturally!) but for now it would be great to compare notes with people in the testing stage. I hope this doesn't sound like a moan about any other threads because they've been really useful to me over the last months. I'm just feeling a little lonesome and have no one IRL going through the same thing.

Moondreamer Fri 12-Jun-15 13:07:33

Sorry about the lack of paragraphs blush

Elektra83 Fri 12-Jun-15 15:32:18

Hi Moondreamer, I'm kind of in the same situation as you - well I think you're a little ahead of me. We have our first fertility appt in a couple of weeks and I feel like I'm in limbo too.

It's a bit rubbish isn't it?

Moondreamer Fri 12-Jun-15 17:33:13

Sorry you're in a similar position, it's definitely a bit of a rubbish place to be. Fingers crossed your meeting with the infertility people will be constructive. Have you had to wait long for the appointment?

I think I've now had nearly every test known to man(and woman)kind so if you have any questions after your appointment feel free to pop back here and ask smile.

Elektra83 Fri 12-Jun-15 18:33:25

Thank you! Our original appoint was supposed to be this week but they pushed it back. It's been a couple of months since we were referred. I've been ok with the wait as I am panicking about the BMI side of things sad

I'm not massive but over the scale and now I have The Fear that they will weigh me and I will be over the BMI criteria, annoying as I do exercise a lot and the weight lifting may count against me!

I may take you up on your offer to ask questions! I really have no idea what to expect to be honest!

lugo40 Fri 12-Jun-15 19:07:32

I think I am the same. Our gp has organised tests for us which showed I had a polyp - now removed - but hormones normal and husband has low sperm motility. So we've been referred and waiting. Also loosing weight as if we need Ivf I new my BMi down. Feel a little like as soon as they found the sperm issue they stopped testing- I no it's good they at least found a reason and have referred but I'm nervous they've missed a problem with my tubes or something. But I thinknim just anxious about it all. And waiting.

Moomin37 Fri 12-Jun-15 21:23:46

Hello can I join? smile I stopped taking the pill last July and still no AF (I am 36 and TTC #1). Paid to see private consultant in January who found some problems and ever since I've been waiting for a lap and dye which is happening next month. I'll then find out if it's ov induction or IVF. So I sympathise with those who are also in limbo - it's rubbish. Oh to be in the other forum fretting about a TWW...

Moondreamer Sat 13-Jun-15 13:58:09

Hi Iugo and Moomin!The more the merrier here, it certainly sounds like we're all doing the same waiting (and worrying) game at the moment.

We waited a couple of months for our first appointment too Elektra. I think the guidelines for the next appointment after that is a maximum 3 months so that's not too bad but ours was actually 4 (good old NHS).

It's interesting that several of us are worried about BMI (I was 29 point something at my first appointment so have to be careful not to put any weight on as I'm a short arse so it makes a huge difference even a few pounds). As if we don't have enough to be worrying about! Although maybe it's a good distraction during the waiting hmm

Iugo I had a polyp removed too (fun). I have no idea if that will make any difference, I suspect not given other sperm issues also identified for us. Did they not also offer you an HSG test to check your tubes when they offered the examination that found the polyp?

Moomin, it's great that you've been able to find the issues relativity quickly and have an appointment to hopefully sort it out. Are you planning to go private for the whole thing or are you back to the NHS for the lap and dye etc?

Hopefully we will all be able to cross to the Pregnancy boards soon, even if we can't be on the TWW threads! I used to be so excited every month thinking this could be the one. I think I could go in holiday with all the money spent on ov and pregnancy tests grin

Moomin37 Sat 13-Jun-15 18:27:42

Hiya Moondreamer thanks for the warm welcome smile I've been on the NHS waiting list for lap and dye - needed to get body in better shape (less exercise, less sugar, more protein etc.). Now it's almost here I'm getting a bit nervous, but it's another big step in the right direction smile What's you next step?

Moondreamer Sun 14-Jun-15 17:15:43

I'm not sure what the next step is. We have a meeting with the fertility team in the next fortnight dk hopefully they'll suggest some kind of plan (iui or ivf?) but I'm worried they'll just send us away to try for a full 2 years or even more tests sad. Although actually I'm not sure what else the could test us for!

I always get nervous before tests but weirdly quite impatient to get them done too. Think it's all about making progress. The lap and dye is definitely a step in the right direction. Do you have to take long off work after that? I was offered one but had a couple of other tests instead (hsg and hysteroscopy) which found a problem so they stopped there.

gakay Mon 15-Jun-15 10:11:36

Hi, can I join you girls please?
I'm about to turn 34 and have been trying for 9 months. Had 2 consecutive early mc's in the first 2 cycles and then nothing apart from cycles getting a bit irregular and started premenstrual spotting which is also getting longer. Lucky that my GP agreed to refer me and will be seen at fertility clinic in 3 weeks. GP hasn't done any tests yet. I asked for a d21 progesterone test but someone stupidly ran a different test so have to wait another cycle.

I'm really nervous about the appt. I guess they will just send us away with lots of tests. I'm hoping nothing is wrong with us and we will conceive naturally but I'm also hoping they'll find something that's wrong and fix it quickly.

GoneGirl1 Mon 15-Jun-15 14:54:37

Hello, I also feel the same way moondreamer i see people on the ttc boards and Ivf and I'm someone stuck in the middle!
I'm currently waiting for my first first appointment at the fertility clinic was told could take up to 6-8weeks or longer, currently in the 5th week now though feels like a lifetime!

Moondreamer Mon 15-Jun-15 21:30:31

Hi gakay and GoneGirl! Sorry you've had to join us in what feels like the waiting room.

gakay sounds like you've had a rough time of it with 2 early MCs. Plus then running the wrong test, how annoying. Great to hear that your GP has been on the ball though. I got referred a bit early too due to spotting which is when they found the polyp. Thank goodness for good GPs!

Fingers crossed that you'll get pregnant naturally while you're waiting for the tests. If not then getting on to it so quickly will mean any issues will be found good and early. Try not to be too nervous about the first appointment (easier said than done I know!), it's a step in the right direction.

Hey GoneGirl, it's weird not having a 'place' isn't it. And hard if you can't share it with friends either. Makes time drag even more.

If it takes too long could you try asking for a cancellation slot? I'm not sure if all clinics do them but when we were told it was 4 months til the next appointment the receptionist suggested calling for a cancellation after all the tests were done (although maybe only ok after the initial appointment?).

I'm not sure how long this thread will run for (a while I hope obviously!) but I did find another forum for infertility issues with an area of people having tests
that was also useful. I prefer the mumsnet vibe which is why I posted here but in case this goes quiet other people visiting might find it useful too smile

gakay Tue 16-Jun-15 09:54:39

moondreamer thank you for the link. I'll read through it later.
If you don't mind me asking, what was the first appt like for you? Did your OH attend with you?

gonegirl I agree with moondreamer may be worth giving them a call to see if there is a cancellation.

Laura7883 Thu 18-Jun-15 21:22:40

Hi *moondreamer, I know exactly how you feel. My husband's first sperm test which showed no sperm was in november! Then we had an app in Jan, more sperm tests in march, results in may, still no decent sperm. Next app now July! I had tests in April, get my results in 2 weeks. Very frustrating!!

Pebbles086 Fri 19-Jun-15 17:50:36

Hello Ladies, I hope you don't mind me joining this thread?! I feel like I could fit in here! Reason being:
I have been TTC AF #1 since Aug last year, I came off the pill as soon as I got married. In Dec my periods vanised, Dr gave me noresterine to induce AF in March and I had some bloods etc. had an scan that confirmed I have PCOS and a blocked Fallopian tubesad
I meet with a consultant last week and he suggested a lap and dye to see if the R tube is ok, if so I could try hormones and have the blocked tube removed. If both blocked IVF is the option. Thought I would be waiting ages for the lap and dye but really grateful I have been scheduled in for next week!! I would usually be scared of having a procedure done under GA, but this time I just want it done and to get some answers. I am really hoping I can have hormones rather than IVF my only choice to start with.
I am grateful I have a pretty solid diagnosis, so things have moved on really quickly but I still feel in limbo as I am not on any treatment.
Do the rest of you get fed up of googling things and having millions of questions for your GP?!
Lovely to read all your stories

Moondreamer Mon 22-Jun-15 09:09:51

Hi there Laura and Pebbles. Two months for test results seems ridiculous Laura, how incredibly frustrating. I'm afraid I'm the type of annoying patient who calls up to see whether the results are back yet. I think the receptionists hate me (but am starting to get immune to this smile). I'm sure at our next appointment they're going to say my DH needs another sperm test (so more waiting!).

Sounds like things are moving relatively quickly for you Pebbles but I imagine it just moves onto the next stage of worrying sometimes. I hope your lap and dye goes well. Google has definitely become my go to solution (often it sends me to this site!) but it can all be a bit depressing and I get tired of feeling like I need to search for the answer when I just want someone to tell me what's the matter and how to best fix it sad

gakay, sorry for the late response (things got so crazy at work I forgot to even worry about TTC! Must have been bad wink). At our first appointment my DH cam with me (they said in the letter he should). They weighed and measured both of us (and later commented that our weights were fine so I guess they worked out our BMIs). We then both went in to see the dr (and a random nurse who was never introduced, a new pet hate of mine, together with the lurking anonymous medical student).

He went over our general details (how long trying etc), my test results (all fine) and then DH's semen analysis results (not quite right, the first time we heard this so if you have any results outstanding I'd really try to find these before the meeting so it's not a surprise. We were a bit caught unaware so couldn't ask all the questions we subsequently had when we got home (and Googled!).

He then talked about possible treatment options (seemed keen on IUI for some reason) and next steps. So in my case this was more tests to see if they could find the cause of my mid cycle bleeding and at the same time to see if there were any issues that would stop IUI from working. And then off we went. Was a weird feeling because immediately when we left we felt really optimistic but then all the questions about the tests results started and we got progressively more down hearted. Hopefully your appointment will be nice and straightforward though.

Elektra83 Mon 22-Jun-15 13:35:32

gakay that was really helpful!

We have our first appt this week and now I'm a little apprehensive about it - I've been able to forget about it for so long but now it's just always there at the front of my mind!

GoneGirl1 Mon 22-Jun-15 16:57:14

moondreamer and gakay thanks for the advice. It didnt cross my mind to call up to check if there are any cancellations. I will defo do that when I get back from my holiday as I'm off today. Need something to take my mind off ttc!

moondreamer when is your next appointment? I totally understand how you feel about having lots of Qs AFTER you've left the clinic. Hopefully you'll get answers at your next appointment?

Good luck for your appointment Elektra83!

Pebbles086 Mon 22-Jun-15 20:25:43

Seems like we are all in a bit of limbo... With waiting for the next appt etc.... But another step closer (hopefully)
From reading your stories, it doesn't seem too impossible for natural pregnancies to occur. I think the more research you do the more negative things seem to be. I Am aware of couples who have conceived naturally that were in similar situations. However, I am not one of those annoying people who say "just relax and it will happen"! That's so frustrating when your TTC after some time. Maybe some people just get lucky or need just a little help with OV induction? Xxx
gayay really sorry to read about your early MCs, can only imagine how upsetting that was. I hope your problem gets resolved very soon xx
I've now promised my self no more googling lap and dye procedures... I'll just have to wait till Thursday!!

Moomin37 Fri 26-Jun-15 17:38:49

How are you feeling Pebbles? I hope the lap and dye went well flowers. I've got mine next month.

Pebbles086 Fri 26-Jun-15 21:24:27

Hello Moomin
It went great thank you, I am sure your nervous for yours now.
Once your given the GA your pretty much asleep straight away and the whole procedure only takes 30 mins. I went in at 9:30 and was ready to be picked up by 11:30, had a lovely sleep off the GA grin I am just really bloated and the stitches are a little uncomfortable but I haven't taken any pain killers.
I was told that other than the left tube being blocked everything else was normal, just got to wait for my follow up with the consultant. Think I'll need the tube removing then maybe it will be Clomid or IVF, who knows!?
When you go make sure you take some pads with you, youll need one for the dye residue.
It's really not as bad as I thought, I rested yesterday and today then went for a wak earlier, as I was bored of sitting down.

Best of luck with yours xxx

Moondreamer Sat 27-Jun-15 22:12:38

We had our appointment this week but it's take me a while to get my head round it enough to post.

Basically the outcome seems to be that they're going to refer us for IVF if we don't conceive in the next few months but when they do there is going to be a longish wait for approval for funding from the CCG. This is really what I was hoping for so I feel like I should be happy but now I'm stupidly worried that they'll turn us down. Plus I was sure they'd suggest IUI first so was a surprise they'd go straight to IVF. Apparently NICE aren't keen on IUI any more?

I also asked if it might be a good idea to get an AMH test to check my ovarian reserve while we're waiting and the dr then said that actually my FSH levels are at the high end of normal (over 8) so this might be a good idea. This was a bit of a shock as I thought my levels were fine! So now I'm really worried about my ovarian reserve too confused

In the interim they're going to refer DH for more tests (not sure why they didn't do this beforehand as his results were clearly not normal). This aside he said they don't need to see us again which is a bit surreal. So we're basically just waiting now. More time in limbo! Even if the AMH tests come back as high I'm not sure this makes any difference, it won't speed up IVF and in fact is an exclusion criteria for some CCGs. I just can't get my head round this.

As an aside when we got to the clinic there was what looked like member of staff visiting with their new baby. I get that people totally have the right to do this but perhaps she could have waited until the fertility clinic was finished for the day or come a different day. It's pretty torturous waiting for an appointment to see why you can't get pregnant while watching someone show off their newborn. And we haven't had anywhere near as bad experiences as some people there.

Anyway, epic rant over! Pebbles really glad your lap well and nothing untoward was found - great news.

Hope you're having a lovely holiday GoneGirl. I'm off in a couple of days and can't wait!

How did your appointment go Elektra? I hope they answered your questions and have a plan that you're happy with.

Pebbles086 Sun 28-Jun-15 22:18:29

moondreamer sorry your appt. turned out like that. The consultant had mentioned to me about IVF but I have few more hurdles to climb. It must of been a real shock for you, but at least you have it as an opition and the Dr seems to think you could still conceive naturally. There's no harm trying whilst waiting for the funding.
I hope the rest of yours and DH's tests come back ok, sounds like you could do with a bit of a break from Drs appt. flowers
Everywhere I turn there's a pregnant woman, cute baby or announcement. I now block them out my mind and totaly switch my attention to something else otherwise and cry my eyes out.
I hope you have a good week and rest of you ladies

Moondreamer Mon 29-Jun-15 12:48:14

Thanks Pebbles and you're right of course, there definitely are some positives in there smile.

How long until your follow up appointment? Not too long I hope.

Thinking of everyone else having tests or waiting for appointments. Hopefully by the time I come back from holiday there will be some updates.

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