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The All Things Donor Conception Thread

(398 Posts)
foxinorangesocks Tue 03-Jun-14 20:03:37

Thought I'd start an ongoing thread for all mnetters that are having, thinking about having or have had treatment using donor eggs or sperm or who are considering/have been a donor. Come and talk about all stages of using or being a donor, from exploring the idea of donor conception and pursuing treatment (or not) to parenting donor conceived children or being a donor- all in a supportive and encouraging space. Whilst I say All Things - this is NOT meant to be a thread for expressing concerns over the ethics/morals of donor conception in negative/forceful/hurtful ways. Please start a thread elsewhere for this.

sideshowbob2 Sun 14-Sep-14 08:50:12

sorry to hear your news control, if you need anything we are all here to talk anytime!

foxinorangesocks Sat 13-Sep-14 19:05:32

Control I am so very sorry to hear your news. I can only imagine how upsetting your loss has been after so much hope. But there is hope, even though I imagine it feels very bleak right now. You can become pregnant this way. For some reason this time you've had horrible luck but you WILL get there in time. The inertia of infertility is wretched and smothering sometimes but it ebbs and flows and you will feel better than you do right now. I'm also so very sorry that this thread was quiet when you needed kind words and loads of support. I took a break as there's not a lot happening for me right now. If it helps to chat on here please do, to talk of where nexts or just the bloody unfairness of it all. thanks

ControlGeek Fri 12-Sep-14 08:45:50

Sorry, I thought I had posted an update on here. I had a miscarriage last Thursday. Can't even think about the future right now. Devastated doesn't even begin to cover it.

sideshowbob2 Fri 12-Sep-14 06:04:09

hi fox, total chaos and dis-organisation at school!!
workmen have been and completed 1 job so far and cocked up on 2 others, ordering the 3 large radiators instead of 1 large and 2 small, the extractor fan was fitted wednesday but doesn't work, got a man coming to fix it today!! radiators are booked in for the 24th of september now, as i need my dad to sit here and babysit them, the men came on wednesday and scrapped off the ivy but nothing else yet!!
i've not got very far with the damp painting but i was waiting till the radiator was in, now its been delayed, i;ll start again at the weekend!!
can't wait til today is over and its bedtime again!!
seeing my g.p tomorrow morning as i had all my FSH and LH levels re-done, also my 2nd funding request is due back any day!! really hoping i don;t have to put a 3rd one in but i will, as i have nothing else to do while i'm saving for the next cycle!!
how are you fox??

foxinorangesocks Thu 11-Sep-14 18:12:31

Catching up on here after a break. Control how are you - are things ok?

sideshowbob2 Sat 30-Aug-14 10:13:03

hi control, council man came out Thursday, he's ordered me an extractor fan for the bathroom, I've asked for this before and was always told i didn't need one, heating survey to check the bedroom radiator is big enough and working correctly, fixing kitchen door as it doesn't close, the ivy is finally being properly removed and dug out, whole front wall repaired and then sealed, also the whole balcony, the one above me and the one next door is total broken through age and he was surprised i didn't have a leak in my lounge, also i have the claim form to finish and send off, as i had trouble with my camera and laptop not connecting correctly so had to email them to my nephew to i could print them, there were 32 holes just near my bedroom window!! so i have the extractor fan man coming Monday to do his survey and heating man coming Tuesday to do his survey and testing!!
back to reality on Wednesday!! but looking forward to it and getting back into a normal routine!!

hope everyone else is ok!!

ControlGeek Fri 29-Aug-14 19:17:39

Any news on the damp issue sideshow?

Good to see you around lauren, but very sorry you're in limbo. Would it help to talk through your options and thoughts here?

I think I must have jinxed things by telling a friend of mine who is moving away about the pg. I've had brown cm for the last two days and today had moderate bleeding with clots. My Spanish clinic have put me on bed rest for today and the rest of the weekend, with instructions on booking a scan towards the end of next week if the bleeding stops, and contacting an epu/out of hours if it doesn't. Things seemed to have calmed down after my earlier cramps and clots, but I'm scared to go back to the loo and find out.

I managed to get more bloods taken today and they came back at 3332 which is a good reading for my current dpo but the nurse did stress you couldn't read much into a single test on its own. She didn't seem keen on booking me in for another, just said to wait and decide on monday based on how the weekend goes. It would be too early for a scan to be of any use (5 weeks).

Sorry for the doom and gloom tone, I had convinced both me and dp that I had lost the baby and part of me thinks it's almost safest to carry on believing that for now.

sideshowbob2 Fri 29-Aug-14 07:05:54

good to see you back lauren!!
i'm just waiting for my 2nd funding request to come back!!
school starts back on wednesday so hopefully i'll be so busy it will take my mind off it!!
as well as trying to get my bedroom re-decorated before the new bed arrives at the beginning of october!!

Lauren83 Fri 29-Aug-14 00:13:29

Control that's amazing!! So glad someone broke the bad luck streak, so happy for you

Hi everyone else sorry been off the radar just in limbo at the mo

sideshowbob2 Wed 27-Aug-14 19:08:36

hi control the didn't ring me on tuesday morning!! so i rang them, i received my claim form today and i'm currently printing off the photo's of the holes in the front wall and damp in the corners of the windows!!
also photocopied the receipts for purchases already made and listed them all on the claim form!!
i'm going to add a covering letter with it all, explaining what needs to be done within the 4 weeks to ensure this doesn't happen again!!

ControlGeek Wed 27-Aug-14 18:40:36

How are things going sideshow and fox I hope you are both doing well and being kind to yourselves xxx

<waves to everyone else>

Please let me know if you would rather I left the thread - I won't be offended, I just don't want to make it harder for anyone than it already is, I know all too well what that pain feels like.

sideshowbob2 Mon 25-Aug-14 13:05:19

ahh wow that's fab control!!
i'm back on track after the meltdown!! someone will be paying for the damp in my bedroom!! looks like the council, i've emailed them and very strong worded one and i've mentioned that i will speak to my MP if the problems of damp are not fixed in 4 weeks!! the new bed arrives in 6 weeks, told them i need to make a claim against their buildings insurance for the cost of the new bed and all the paint etc!! i'm expecting a phone at 9am Tuesday morning as they should be crapping their pants now!!

ControlGeek Mon 25-Aug-14 12:12:51

fox and sideshow those drugs really mess you around. I found that straight after my failed cycles I felt fine, raring to go again, isn't this amazing I'm actually ok I must have prepared myself well - then bang! Week 2 post-fail my entire world came crumbling down. It does get better bit by bit, but you have to let yourself have your bad days and not beat yourself up about it, especially if you think 'I should be over this by now'. Listen to your body xx

Just a quick update as I've now had my bloods back from Saturday - I am such a jinx, the clinic's IT systems went down when I was supposed to be getting my results yesterday, so they couldn't read ANY test results from Saturday!

Anyway, the upshot is on 12dpo my bloods tested with a level of 90. It was hoped they would double or at least increase by 60% over the next 48 hours, so ideally looking for around 180, or at the very least 150. Saturday's results (14dpo) were....

... 313!!!!!

I'll be booking my scan for around the 7 week mark, when hopefully I can see a little hb and know that all is still progressing as it should.

sideshowbob2 Fri 22-Aug-14 19:45:06

ahh thanks fox, I've been fine until today, in fact I've been really happy, but it was money is was tipped me over the edge, needing to buy stuff but not sure if i should, as i need all the money i can get for the next cycle, so burst into tears at my best friend, so lucky i didn't go out today!!
my friend reckons I've been up for ages and today finally hit the down in a big way, so much so she called our other friend and she rang me too!!
so lucky to have such supportive friends!!
think i've got my head round the money issue now, so fingers crossed tomorrow will be a much better day!!
hope you feel better soon as well fox

foxinorangesocks Fri 22-Aug-14 19:22:49

Woo hoo congrats control! Can imagine how nerve wracking it is, hang in there.

Bob I've been an emotional mess post drugs too, partly why I've not been here much. I'm sure we'll both settle out soon.

sideshowbob2 Fri 22-Aug-14 18:23:42

hi everyone!! how are you all doing??
just checking in really, had a really bad day, emotional meltdown over nothing, thank god for best buddies is all i can say!! both my besties think is ivf medication residue and hormone over load, so fingers crossed its gone away and not to be seen again!! had a cry over nothing, so hopefully tomorrow is a better day!!

sideshowbob2 Tue 19-Aug-14 15:24:17

yeah i thought the private clinic's would do blood tests any day of the week, i had one to confirm i wasn't pregnant with my first cycle!!
always trying to save money, so i get regular FSH and LH blood tests done through my gp plus she is helping my to trying and get ivf on the nhs too!!
yes blood test i had yesterday was 2-4 day cycle one, got another blood test booked in for day 21 as well!

ControlGeek Tue 19-Aug-14 14:10:02

Sideshow my clinic seems to operate as normal at the weekend, my first cycle involved close monitoring of estradiol levels as I was borderline ohss and the saturday test came back the same day. Bear in mind this is a private clinic and I'll be pqying through the nose for the privilege. Were you looking for an nhs test?

sideshowbob2 Tue 19-Aug-14 14:04:59

control think its very hard to get a Saturday blood test i tried the other day, there was only 1 hospital near me open for walk ins 10-11.45am and that was it, so had one booked for yesterday but was nearly an hour late as my hair appointment run over but they were fine about it!!
as i'm getting my FSH and LH levels checked to see what's occurring while i wait for my 2nd exceptional funding request to come back, takes up to 4 weeks but the 1st came back within 2 weeks!! so we will see!!
my fingers are firmly crossed for you!

ControlGeek Tue 19-Aug-14 13:56:33

Thanks sideshow - you're so right. Today's line has given me enough confidence to just enjoy today. I even risked buying a spanish pg mag for the flight home!

I've texted my uk cons to see if there is any chance of a saturday blood test in the uk but surprise surprise no answer so far. If I can get a saturday test it would be great as I'd then have had two tests two days apart, so will be able to see if my numbers are doubling as they should.

sideshowbob2 Tue 19-Aug-14 10:21:16

morning control, try not to panic, i know its hard, i think that's part of why my first cycle was unsuccessful, fear of the unknown, but now i know what's going to happen ready for next time, if your time is right all will be fine, try and enjoy your time off work while you can!!

ControlGeek Tue 19-Aug-14 07:36:12

Eh? Stupid phone has a mind of its own!

...anxiety attack that this cycle would go like the last and was already over as soon as I got my bfp. Poor dp, he's anxious enough himself without having to deal with that!

ControlGeek Tue 19-Aug-14 07:25:07

Morning ladies! How is everyone doing?

I got a good strong line on an frer this morning, which made a total mockery of a massive

sideshowbob2 Mon 18-Aug-14 15:58:58

ahh thanks control, i've been wishing for pain free periods for so long!!

ControlGeek Mon 18-Aug-14 13:56:19

Sideshow it might take a couple of cycles to settle down, but sometimes the ivf drug regimes can sort out painful periods for longer term. Since my last one in January mine have been very light and painfree.

Sleeps my test was an frer, it's the only type I trust. Fingers crossed for a trouble free singleton smile glad I am not the only one who tests stupidly early!

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