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The All Things Donor Conception Thread

(398 Posts)
foxinorangesocks Tue 03-Jun-14 20:03:37

Thought I'd start an ongoing thread for all mnetters that are having, thinking about having or have had treatment using donor eggs or sperm or who are considering/have been a donor. Come and talk about all stages of using or being a donor, from exploring the idea of donor conception and pursuing treatment (or not) to parenting donor conceived children or being a donor- all in a supportive and encouraging space. Whilst I say All Things - this is NOT meant to be a thread for expressing concerns over the ethics/morals of donor conception in negative/forceful/hurtful ways. Please start a thread elsewhere for this.

foxinorangesocks Tue 03-Jun-14 20:06:48

To kick off, I am fox and about to start downregging for first cycle of de after a rather disastrous three and half years in the word of TRYING. Dh is fine, I have v low afc and borderline fsh. First de with own eggs produced only two follicles on max dosage of menopur, one vanished half way through and the other ovulated itself a few hours before ec. What a bust. Chances of less than 5 per cent made is decide to crack on with de ivf. I am 37 now. Scratch end of the week...

Lauren83 Tue 03-Jun-14 22:14:09

Nice one fox

Here's my story...

Ttc 7 years altogether I'm 30, I had multiple surgeries for stage 4 endo to get me ready for ivf last year, first cycle Aug 2013 got 4 eggs with 100% fertilisation, double transfer non to freeze BFN.
Dec 2013 2nd cycle cancelled due to AMH of 2 and FSH now 23, diagnosed pof/early menopause so our nhs clinic discharged us and we had to apply to transfer funding as they didn't do donor treatment where I was (St Mary's Manchester) I'm now at Care Manchester for an unknown donor cycle and we got matched last month, had a scratch and started down reg 2 weeks ago

Be nice to get some donor buddies

Kannet Tue 03-Jun-14 22:22:58

I have been trying for 6 years. I'm. 33. The dr thinks it might be a genetic mismatch. Had a lids of tests. The results should be through in three weeks. All being well we will be getting donor eggs from Spain . It's been a big decision but at least there seems to be light at the end of a long tunnel

suzylee73 Wed 04-Jun-14 12:11:20

Hi ladies smile

We have been trying for 6 years and after several ops to repair damaged tubes and eventual removal we had a failed IVF sad The years have ticked on by and now at 41 the decision to use a donor egg was a hard one but it will give us the best chance of success.

Having treatment in Poland and we are just waiting for a donor match.

wishing us all some good luck and a BFP :D

foxinorangesocks Wed 04-Jun-14 20:12:03

Good to see people here smile but gosh what journeys we've had. Infertility is one of the hardest things I've experienced, I think because the end point is so hard to see and to be in control of. Here's to being in with good odds.

resipsa Wed 04-Jun-14 22:12:50

Have had two DE cycles - 1 fresh, 1 frozen - both resulted in BFPs and, sadly, both ended in m/c at about 6 weeks. I thought that I had the golden ticket (twice!) but didn't. Wishing you all better luck than me.

resipsa Wed 04-Jun-14 22:15:53

PS Plan was not to pour cold water on your hope but rather to urge you to think of DEs like others are told to view OEs. Aim for success in 3 cycles and don't get down if it doesn't work first time.

foxinorangesocks Wed 04-Jun-14 22:32:00

Thanks resispa. We met once on the egg buddies thread before Christmas and I'm so sorry to hear that de hasn't been the answer for you yet. Are you going to do another cycle? I am most definitely stepping into this both super cautiously and very much willing it to work. Managing hope and buffering against disappointments is so difficult. I feel if I'm not hopeful at all then the whole experience is even more wretched but allowing myself to be hopeful can make the crash of a failure so much more painful. Hard times. Plus shiploads of hormones. Who'd be fertility challenged?!

resipsa Wed 04-Jun-14 22:42:30

Hi Fox. No more for me, we're done (emotionally and financially). The 2nd m/c was the day after seeing a heartbeat. I could not do that again. We have a DD (age 3 and conceived w/o assistance). If we decide that we can cope, we'll adopt DC2.

foxinorangesocks Fri 06-Jun-14 10:52:03

Oh resispa that is so unfair and tough. I hope you are starting to feel a bit more ok. Good luck with next plans.

I just had my scratch. I took Co coda mol beforehand which made it painless, just like a long (and with my kinked cervix make that super long) uncomfy smear. Very glad it's done.

Lauren how goes it?

Lauren83 Fri 06-Jun-14 11:08:12

Who did it Fox? I'm worried about mine as it took forever to get in and I never felt anything, I had no spotting either, he said he 'thinks' he did it. They couldn't see as I couldn't fill my bladder.

The other recipient only just got her AF a couple of days ago so that's delayed us a bit, I'm next there fri 13th be so good if we were there same day

Hi everyone else!

foxinorangesocks Fri 06-Jun-14 11:22:45

I don't know, I've not seen him before. He had mousey grey hair and was nice enough. I felt it a bit, not pain but a draggy feeling. No spotting for me either. Maybe they don't go in for aggressive scratching?! I do have period type pains now. I'm sure yours will have gone in. My tilted womb made it an arse for him I think. It took about 15 minutes to get through. I am supposed to get my period on fri 13th so will be starting downregging then. What a date! It felt odd today that all the staff presumed I'd have had that procedure or embryo transfer before. Just shows how few people strike it lucky first time. Is next week a scan for you?

Pinki26 Fri 06-Jun-14 16:37:12

Hi, I just wanted to post to hopefully give you some hope. Following more than 8 years of trying for a baby, numerous tests, pcos, variable sperm count, miscarriage at 13 weeks and 4 rounds of ivf, I am now sitting here with 3week old twin girls.
Thanks to a wonderful clinic in Spain who didn't give up hope on me like the NHS did and a lovely lady who kindly (and anonymously) donated her eggs, I had 2 frozen embryos implanted and my dream is now a reality.

It cost a fair bit of money not to mention the emotional rollercoster but was well worth it.
I just want to say, don't give up however difficult it gets. Keep believing it will happen. Good luck to you all

Lauren83 Fri 06-Jun-14 17:46:53

pinki thanks so much for posting, gives us all hope! And congrats, sounds like you had a rough ride with it all

Fox I had Glenn Atkinson, tall balding head roundish face, he is medical director they said, nice chap.

They also had to use a tiny catheter after starting with a normal one and changing 3 times so I'm convinced even if they got in it wouldn't of done much, funny Fri 13th is key for us both, it's my first down reg scan to check everything's gone ok. So you are 21 days behind me aren't you if you start then, be so good if we can be bump buddies won't it x

foxinorangesocks Sat 07-Jun-14 10:53:41

He is the cons I normally have seen Lauren, he's always been very nice. Do you have a rough idea about embryo transfer timings?

foxinorangesocks Sat 07-Jun-14 10:55:05

Thank too pinki. Twin girls smile have you told people about using donor eggs?

Lauren83 Sat 07-Jun-14 11:28:40

I had Mr Patel, I think about 7th July at a guess, when will yours be roughly?

foxinorangesocks Sat 07-Jun-14 11:31:09

They said the back end of July which makes sense if I'm three weeks behind you. Are downregging symptoms getting any better? Also, are you using embryo glue? I haven't even thought to ask about that (nor understand what it is really)

Lauren83 Sat 07-Jun-14 12:12:02

I have felt a little better yes just dead tired, I considered the glue but haven't gone with it, my understanding is its an enzyme that occurs naturally but dipping it in the 'glue' creates higher levels or something, its not glue as in sticky glue

Do you think it's worth it?

foxinorangesocks Sun 08-Jun-14 22:00:09

I think I'm going to ask about it. I think it's about £100 so in the grand scheme of things... I'm cd 24 now. I can just imagine this will be the one month my period is late and I wont even be able to get excited as we didn't try this month because of the scratch!

Lauren83 Sun 08-Jun-14 23:52:02

I think it's £90 or £95 but then I though is that per embie? I'm undecided let me know you what you decide

The tiredness has lifted now at least a little, roll on July! X

foxinorangesocks Mon 09-Jun-14 19:49:57

I think I am going to ask for it Lauren, every little helps right?! Glad you're feeling less tired. I have cramps today so wondering if af is going to come a bit early. Maybe the scratch has done it blush

sideshowbob2 Mon 09-Jun-14 20:19:13

hi everyone recommended to come on here by foxinorangesocks. the story so far is, i am 36 this year, i have worked with children for over 2 years so meeting men isn't easy, just haven't found a life partner yet!!
i had all tests and tube scan last year and they found out i had a tilted womb, then amh levels were low so had DHEA medication for nearly 6 months, changed clinics because the consultant retired and they lost their only approved nurse, new clinic is great had my 1st appointment on 12th april and after a long discussion decided to start treatment using donor egg and donor sperm, then had the scratch and started down reg injections on 27th may, unfortunately the bleed i was supposed to have still hasn't arrived to we are all waiting now!! was supposed to have baseline scan last wednesday 4th june, so just waiting!!
i was going to have the glue when i get to that stage!

foxinorangesocks Mon 09-Jun-14 20:41:31

Glad you've joined us smile what has the clinic suggested about the waiting?

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