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44 how long to get help

(14 Posts)
Convoy2000 Wed 30-Oct-13 21:29:07


Sorry post is so long but I've never posted & am frustrated by situation.

I'm 43 -never been pregnant, but am healthy, bmi 21 etc & trying for 1 year.
Am not ovulating every month (home tests) maybe 3 months out of 6.. Want my GB to prescribe Cholmid or similar to encourage ovulation.
Note I very rarely am ill so don't really go to GP, so have no relationship & tend to see a different individual doctor on the rare occasions I go in tot he GP practice

Last (& only GP I asked about this ) was a bit dismissive - immediately said that because of my age that really only egg donation would work.

I thought that GB's could at least do a test for residual eggs (sorry don't know offical name of test) and surely could prescribe chlomid.
But no - what a waste of time - she only referred me to a clinic.
6 weeks later - NO further info. No appointment.

HELP!!! Grrr. I'll pay/go private but it seem a waste of time going to a GB who can neither take action NOR seemingly secure a clinic appointment.! (OR maybe 6 weeks is normal for no notice????)

Can I buy the drugs on the internet - (PLEASE do NOT give me a lecture about this being a bad idea just real stories)
OR can I self refer to a clinic to get someone to check me & give me what ever prescription is needed?
Surely - 'jump immediately to IVF with Egg doner' is OTT????

ilikecooking Wed 30-Oct-13 21:54:15

The test to see what your egg reserve is like is called the AMH. I'm sure others will come along and advise you of the figures you're after.

As for starting, you need to go to the GP who will either do various blood tests on specific days of your cycle or send you via referral to your fertility unit for these. You'll need to think about waiting list lengths and the cost as I don't know what your NHS postcode lottery state of play is.

AFAIK you can't buy the drugs online as the unit will deal with this side of things or give you a prescription.

Convoy2000 Wed 30-Oct-13 22:16:57

Thanks for reply. The GP did mention the need to do an egg reserve test. but refused to do it herself when I asked her. She felt it could only be done by a specialist and told me she would refer me.

Equally told her I would pay to go private if needed.

I just cannot understand why my GP would not do the test nor why I am waiting and waiting for a referral.... what is the point in even going to my gp

HoopHopes Wed 30-Oct-13 23:06:41

NHS tests can take months, without the wait to see a specialist. Only consultants will do the AMH tests. If you have the money with your age I would immediately find a place that is private and get an appointment ASAP.6-9 months of NHS tests is a long wait at your age.

Mouldypineapple Wed 30-Oct-13 23:15:40

Some clinics only do the AMH test privately and if you are considering IVF. my Consultant is reluctant to let me have one for our circumstances (I'm 40 with secondary infertility). I think he said it costs about £300 to do the test (but I may be wrong!). But yes get seen sooner rather than later definitely. If you see someone privately for an initial consultation you may still be able to access some NHS care but it is a much quicker path.

Irishmammybread Wed 30-Oct-13 23:35:42

Hi Convoy .
I have three DCs but had an unexpected pregnancy at 44 last year which I sadly lost at 11wks. We then decided to actively ttc, not to replace the baby we'd lost, but we now felt our family was incomplete.
When googling I came across the "Duo fertility" monitor, a device you wear which continually checks your temperature so you can monitor your cycle and see exactly when you ovulate. It then starts to predict your fertile window. When you subscribe they offer a service where you can phone or email their fertility experts for advice on any aspect of fertility.
I phoned the people who make it just to see if I was suitable to use it. They suggested doing an AMH test. I was able to order the sampling kit from them on line(without any commitment to use the monitor) and brought it to my GP surgery where the nurse took the blood for me, I sent off the sample and results came directly back to me. Cost was about £50 and it took about a week!
My result was low but good for someone my age. On that basis I was told I was eligible for the 12 mth guarantee Duofertility offer, if you're not pregnant in 12 mths you get a full refund.Unfortunately I went on to miscarry again at 6 weeks and then lost a third baby despite a few scans showing a heart beat and growth. I was told at my age any pregnancy had a 50% chance of ending in miscarriage.
This year we decided to stop trying so I stopped using OPKs ,charting my temp and timing dtd. We hadn't actually got around to actively preventing and I conceived again. I'm now 45 years old and 14w4d pregnant.
I was scanned weekly from 7 weeks till my 12 week scan and everything is progressing normally so far, so even in your 40s it can sometimes happen, when you least expect it!
There is a thread on the Conception site for over 40s if you want to join. There are quite a few success stories and a lot of good advice and support along the way.
Btw, if you want to see a consultant privately I think you can just self refer, you don't need to wait for the Gp to refer you.
Good luck x

Dragini Thu 31-Oct-13 09:59:37

You can definately self-refer to a private clinic: I paid £500 for a "fertility MOT" which did all the tests for myself and husband (including AMH to test egg reserve), and included a consultation to look at next steps. If you can afford it, a private clinic will be a very different experience and should give you a very different outlook on the challenges involved. Unfotunately time isn't on your side, so start making some calls and Good Luck! thanks

hawkeye21 Thu 31-Oct-13 10:14:40

Get the AMH and other tests done privately. You should be able to self refer to a private clinic for this.

And telling you that, at 43, egg donation is your only option with NO tests to support this is bollocks. Time is not on your side, but everyone's fertility drops off at different times and different rates. You need the tests to know where you stand and what options are right for you.

Toptack Thu 31-Oct-13 10:16:58

I too did the Duofertility AMH test, then self-referred to a private clinic, when trying to conceive DS2. This was after I had an awful experience with the NHS when trying to conceive DS1 - GP seemed
to be actively trying to stop me from being referred! When I finally rang a private clinic, in floods of tears, the specialist agreed to keep his evening clinic open an extra half hour that day and saw me at nine o'clock at night. If you can afford to go private I would definitely recommend it, if only to avoid weeks of frustrated waiting.

AttilaTheMeerkat Thu 31-Oct-13 13:38:37

You may be 43 and healthy in body but the ovaries will not be as healthy now.

As a woman ages, her supply of eggs gradually declines over time until the eggs are depleted at menopause. The term "ovarian reserve" refers to a woman's current supply of eggs, and is closely associated with reproductive potential. In general, the greater the number of remaining eggs, the better the chance for conception. Conversely, low ovarian reserve greatly diminishes a patient's chances for conception.

Since a woman's chronological age is the single most important factor in predicting a couple's reproductive potential, age has often guided infertility treatment choices. However, age alone doesn't tell the whole story. Consequently, researchers have developed (and are continuing to develop) more refined methods of predicting a couple's response to infertility treatment. Some of the more sophisticated tools for assessing fertility potential include the measurement of FSH, LH, estradiol, and inhibin-B. Additionally, because patients should not be subjected to all tests, decisions regarding which method(s) to use are guided by practitioner experience.

Even though several sophisticated tools exist for measuring ovarian reserve, most fall short of what we consider ideal sensitivity and specificity. Also, how best to interpret ovarian reserve tests is controversial, since clinical experience with these tests is still evolving. Even so, most infertility patients should be periodically evaluated for the possibility of impaired ovarian reserve before pursuing any advanced fertility treatment.

Even before birth, a woman's eggs begin to diminish in number. During the 20th gestation week, a female embryo contains about seven million eggs. At birth, the number of eggs has already dropped to about 200,000. The number of eggs continues to decline as the woman ages, until no eggs remain (menopause).

Fortunately, women are naturally equipped with an ample supply of extra eggs. The number of eggs a woman has at birth far exceeds the average number of menstrual cycles she will have during her lifetime. Therefore, when women undergo fertility treatment to boost egg production, the risk for premature menopause is no different than it would be for other women.

I would pay and go private in your particular circumstances. Do your researches however very carefully before parting with your hard earned cash as it is fair to say some clinics are far better than others. Private treatment can be poor as well as expensive so be careful and ask lots of questions.

lozster Sat 02-Nov-13 00:34:40

Consider taking dhea. Order from the USA as it is not licensed in the uk. My consultant says that it helps with the egg quality. I had a successful round of ivf at 40 after taking this for 3 months. Three previous attempts had failed. It may help with natural conception too.

eurochick Thu 07-Nov-13 13:44:26

TBH I'd stop messing around with the GP and NHS waiting times and self-refer to a private clinic as you say you ar willing to pay. Most clinics will take self-referring patients.

Bombjack Tue 12-Nov-13 22:45:49

I second Lozster's point about DHEA. We used it after being advised against ICSI due to v. low AMH. We went on to have a natural BFP after 3 months of taking DHEA.

Best to do your own reading & research, and make up your own mind. Feel free to PM if you'd like more info on what we did.

Pocket1 Sat 23-Nov-13 20:10:09

Hi Convoy please call/go see Dr Venkat here

I was about your age when i first decided to seriously try for a LO. Got checked out and found out i had a low AMH and needed donor egg IVF. Found Dr Venkat who helped us... we have the most beautiful DD now....

Dont wast time with your GP (they know so little about fertility). Go to someone who can help.

Please at least give them a call. if you dont like them there are loads of other clinics you can try smile

Good luck whatever you do.

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