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Run out of tears. Positive stories & UnMN hug DESPERATELY needed please

(107 Posts)
ilikecooking Sat 30-Mar-13 06:44:44

Does anyone have a positive story to share with me please?

Battled with & overcome eating disorder of 32 years to be fit enough to have a happy healthy pregnancy which on its own took all my strength, willpower & every ounce of emotion out of me.

I've left it so late that the ultrasound for IVF egg collection has showed I only have one follicle. As if that isn't bad enough, it's so small that they think it doesn't contain any eggs.

I'm so stupid. If I'd have dealt with the eating disorder sooner rather than bury it I would have been ok. Previous tests from a decade showed that.

Does anyone have any experience of conceiving via egg donation? Or do you have any positive stories about conception from only one follicle?

Or even if you have a spare unMN hug going. Every time I think I've run out of tears, the waterfalls start again.

Hope you are having a happy Easter with lots of good eggs.xx

ilikecooking Sat 06-Jul-13 23:02:50

Thankyou for your support....just to let you know I produced no follies and therefore no eggs this time.

There won't be any more times.

resipsa Thu 13-Jun-13 07:43:15

Everything crossed for you. If babies were awarded for tenacity, you'd be next in line. Very best of luck .

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 06-Jun-13 14:50:35

Best of luck for this cycle. I hope it works out for you x

FeatherFeather11 Wed 05-Jun-13 21:16:08

Having just read through hs thread, and being very new to the site, I just wanted to wish you all the best in this next phase of your IVF. You've had to go though so much, and your strength throughout has been really inspiring.
Sending you all the baby dust I got.

ilikecooking Wed 05-Jun-13 20:45:04

Not sure if any of you are keen enough to know (I know we all live such busy lives) but in case you're reading this & would like an update....

Ding ding, round 2.

Hospital have done a u-turn. They asked me several times throughout my last attempt at IVF to cancel due to statistical 97% chance of retrieving no eggs. I proved them wrong, got my BFP then miscarried BUT they're now willing to let us try again because we did so amazingly well last time, exceeding all expectations.

Not only that, I explained that psychologically it was doing more harm than good making me wait a few months so as of yesterday, we're now in another cycle (smile)

<<Repeat to myself....Eating disorder is at bay, eating disorder is at bay, eating disorder is at bay...>>

Andcake Tue 30-Apr-13 19:48:31

Just read what happened - I am so v v v sorry. Look after yourself.

ilikecooking Fri 26-Apr-13 13:13:46

Thankyou xx

GP completely understands why I don't want to do more blood & urine preg tests. He agrees that it will physically & mentally hurt me & there is nothing to be gained from re-testing.

The one saving grace (looking on the + side) is that as s/he was so small, there are no loose floaty bits that need surgically removing.

The one bit of the cycle that didn't use drugs, the only part of the whole conception that happened naturally. I can't even get that right. sad

Have to attend an obligatory grievance counselling session....I'm right back at where I was all those years ago with the grieving. Ugh.

Hence the title of the thread.....

Thankyou once again for your support.

PacificDogwood Thu 25-Apr-13 22:32:34

Still thinking of you x.

I hope you are, at least physically, recovering.

QOD Wed 24-Apr-13 08:00:10

Oh how horrible. You poor thing

ilikecooking Wed 24-Apr-13 07:41:10

Incredibly traumatic few days. 4 doctors all at the same time trying to get blood from me to test, in the end they took it without the usual plastic canuler (sp) & went into my wrist with a 2inch needle. Took them so long to withdraw blood that the top bod told us to tell the parking attendant his name so we didn't have to pay any more for the space. The NHS really did look after me very well.

I couldn't leave the toilet without having a mop & bucket to hand, it was a real haemorrhage, pouring black clots.

I have to take a preg test tomorrow to confirm its negative.

My parents are away for a fortnight so are oblivious and they will just be so distraught when they find out they weren't here for me. BUT they always, always made it known they never wanted to know of any negative situation as there's nothing they can do.

Such a mess......literally.

lozster Sun 21-Apr-13 22:46:05

It is so unfair for you. So sad. There is a part of me that is always angry when i hear of what some women go through. There is mo justice in any of this. Keep on posting here - it may be the end of this cycle but you will find the strength to go on.

QOD Sun 21-Apr-13 20:35:03

Sorry, so infar

essexmumma Sun 21-Apr-13 19:49:50

I'm so sorrysad how devastating for you. Virtual hugs xx

DomesticCEO Sun 21-Apr-13 19:45:17

Oh, ilike, that is tooo cruel sad.

Also sending you virtual hugs xxx

Happiestinwellybobs Sun 21-Apr-13 19:44:55

I am so sorry - sending you lots of love and strength to get through this sad

rabbitonthemoon Sun 21-Apr-13 19:43:23

sad hang in there cooking. I'm sorry you're going through this and I hope it has a good outcome. Hug to you.

PacificDogwood Sun 21-Apr-13 18:34:38

Oh no, ilikecooking, I am so sorry to read this sad.
I hope you have good RL support, but here is a virtual [hug] anyway.
Much love and strength.

ilikecooking Sun 21-Apr-13 18:27:50

Just to let you know the doctors think I am miscarrying. Heavy blood loss & blood tests results have 95% confirmed it.

ilikecooking Sat 20-Apr-13 19:18:14

Thankyou all for your kind words. I KNEW MN was the place to come to for help smile

Despite saying the words "I am expecting a baby" it's not ringing true at all. Due to have ultrasound in 2 weeks to see if baby has moved & to see & hear heartbeat. I suddenly feel incredibly grown up.....and incredibly privileged.

I wish everyone that struggles could have a happy ending. Life is cruel sometimes.

Happiestinwellybobs Fri 19-Apr-13 13:17:05

Congratulations - that is amazing news smile

SoulTrain Fri 19-Apr-13 06:51:02

Congratulations cooking! Wishing you all the very best for your pregnancy xxxx

Andcake Thu 18-Apr-13 22:24:44

That's amazing! Congratulations heres is to a happy and healthy 9 months. So v happy or you

essexmumma Thu 18-Apr-13 22:18:07

Massive congrats!!! You DID itgringrin

OpheliasWeepingWillow Thu 18-Apr-13 22:00:16


PacificDogwood Thu 18-Apr-13 21:38:24

Congratulations! grin
I am so pleased for you.

Very, very best of luck for the rest of your pregnancy x.

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