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The hut of gl/doom: ttc with the emphasis on trying!

(976 Posts)
delilahbelle Thu 06-Sep-12 13:34:03

A supportive and slightly fluffy thread for those dealing with the issues of ttc longterm, whether with assisted fertility or not.

Mands81 Wed 19-Sep-12 16:40:26

Brilliant news summer and pink!!!! gringringringrin
Really gives me hope to hear good news for a change! x

flixy102 Wed 19-Sep-12 16:48:14

I love it when the hut is gringringrin!!

waitingtobeamummy Wed 19-Sep-12 17:40:03

Thanks all for your comments, that's exactly what my argument is about getting tests etc done. If that is their decision for ivf fine. But not for scans/clomid etc. I do feel so fed up of it. Just hoping that pals will help my fight a bit. X

queenrollo Wed 19-Sep-12 20:03:23

<<limps in>>

just popping in to see how my old Hut-mates are getting on. Looks like we have some smile stuff happening of late.

waiting welcome to the Hut, you will find this place very supportive and a great place to come and let it all out. I too had a nightmare with my PCT, though in a different way and so I can sympathise with the frustration that you feel. I found the things that got me through it were using my anger to keep fighting and pushing for what I was entitled to and coming in here and calling my Consultant lots of unsavoury names grin

welcome to anyone else who has become resident since I moved on to pastures new. For those of you despairing it took me two and a half years, lots of tests and some surgery to finally get pregnant - I am now 19 weeks, with a bad back and nausea which I am trying to be grateful for in an 'at least I am pregnant' way.

summerintherosegarden Thu 20-Sep-12 08:07:49

Oh pink you've made me feel so much more optimistic, the nurse that did my scan was a bit 50/50 about it. I'd be pushing for two as well if I were you, but then again I quite like the idea of twins smile

Queen thanks for popping in, it's always lovely to hear from graduates of the hut! 19 weeks, I guess that means you can tell everyone now too, how very very exciting it all must be!

ChairOfTheBored Thu 20-Sep-12 08:26:37

mornin' all. Can I be cheeky and ask a question? Oh, I just did. I'll ask another.

Following our first appointment, with startling efficiency I now have three seperate test dates booked (including one with the intimidating dildocam) and a follow up appointment in 7 weeks to discuss the results and agree the next steps. It's great that things are moving so quickly, though we're both a little surprised.

I was wondering if I should tell my boss - simply becuase I don't want them worrying I've got something dreadful, or that I'm using 'tests' as an excuse to go for interviews?

I'm fairly lucky in that I am pretty autonomous in terms of setting my own workload, and can work form home on the days of my appointments and fit work in around them, but still, I'd like to be honest if I can.

On the downside, I don't really want people knowing - we haven't even told the in-laws yet, or my Dad, so feels odd confiding in my boss.

So, the question: What did you all do about work and the time you needed for appointments?

summerintherosegarden Thu 20-Sep-12 09:10:35

I've been really lucky in that my appointments have been either first thing in the morning, or at lunchtime, or at the weekend so it hasn't caused any issues with work at all.

If you feel that you know and trust your boss enough to tell them what your appointments are for then by all means go for it. Alternatively you could fudge it and say something like you've got some hormonal problems, nothing serious, but the docs want to run a few tests to see what's going on.

If your boss is female she'll probably be very understanding, and if male the minute you bring up the words hormones or women's problems he probably won't want to know anything further! (Massive generalisation I know)

In terms of confiding in your boss before anyone else knows - I've told pretty much everyone except the in-laws blush

PS In ref to your post on the other thread about the dildocam - I've been asked to have an empty bladder twice, the other time nobody mentioned anything about the state of my bladder. I'd take a full one along if I were you; you can always empty it at the last minute smile

Devilforasideboard Thu 20-Sep-12 10:03:01

For the tests I just said I had hospital appointments which was all I needed to do to get the time off. When we got the go-ahead and dates for IVF I told my boss and HR (who have both been lovely). I figured that previous to that it might come to nothing and anyway was very straightforward in that I just needed the time for the appointments.

Once treatment started I wasn't sure how I would react and how much time I would need off so though it was only fair to tell them so they knew what was going on. Again they've been fantastic and it's lovely to know I don't have to worry about that side of things. My parents and inlaws don't know and we're planning on keeping it that way for the time being. The way I see it is this is a physically and emotionally demanding process and it's up to us to decide who we need to tell along the way.

Mands81 Thu 20-Sep-12 18:20:36

Chair - I was in your situation a while ago. I would definitely recommend telling work. If you're anything like me you'll start to feel bad taking time off / leaving early / coming in late (even though we shouldn't).
I felt a lot better after because then my colleagues understood if I wasn't myself etc. Also you may not know the side effects of treatment and how you may feel so similar to you I am able to work from home sometimes which helps.
I'm a little bit further down the road in terms of treatment, clomid doesn't seem to be working for me so will be trying something else soon.
For me the more people who knew the easier things have become. Most of our family and friends now know and I'm glad to be honest.
Your work have to allow and support fertility appointments, as they would and will when you're pregnant.
Good luck. Hope everyone else is well x

pinkapples Thu 20-Sep-12 20:21:41

Feeling good today still a bit woozy after the egg collection feel like my stomach is in knots still but the eggs were slightly larger so may have something to do with it.... No news from the clinic today so maybe all 8 are fighting on... Anyone know whether clinics tend to phone if we lose any?

Mands81 Thu 20-Sep-12 21:00:42

Hope you get good news soon pink smile x

summerintherosegarden Thu 20-Sep-12 21:15:06

Sorry pink no idea sad Assume they would phone if you lost enough for them to be worried about this cycle though? When does implantation happen?
Totally natural for your stomach to be in knots, I'd be nervous and excited as anything in your shoes.

pinkapples Thu 20-Sep-12 21:36:08

They plan the transfer for 10am on Sunday and said they'd phone if they identified the best embryo before then. I'm hoping they all get to Sunday then we can pick the best and freeze the rest. I just wondered if they would phone and say however many have arrested or not developed. I don't know no news is good news I guess so hopefully theyre all still there like you say I think theyd fine if they had to move the transfer forward

pinkapples Thu 20-Sep-12 21:36:40

That was meant to say they'd fone

SecretCermonials Thu 20-Sep-12 22:31:30

Hi all

Just popping back to say a huge woooo for pink smile And say i am still thinking of you all, and good luck one an all!

Its really nice to see some grin in the hut, it supported me for a long time While I lurked, and when i eventually got around to posting, simply by telling me i was not alone.

Good luck one and all (I used to post under BBwolefs btw) smile

infamousmrsjones Fri 21-Sep-12 07:26:42

Hi everyone, not been on here since I was going in for egg collection. Just been catching up on how you're all doing. Congrats Pink!!!!!! 8 fertilised is amazing! We have 7 eggs from the egg collection and 3 of them were fertilised at grade 1 so we didn't make it to Blastocyst stage but were very happy with 3 good eggs. Had 2 put back in so very very excited now. Currently playing the waiting game now. 6 days and counting until the preg test nervous and excited at the same time. Will be at work when we can phone for the results so going to wait until I get home before we phone, as doubt will be able to concentrate at work whatever the news! We had out treatment at Manchester and we cannot praise them enough they were fantastic. We've had the rest of the treatment through Halifax and have been disappointed with the customer care there, however Manchester were perfect with every step of the way and very sensitive about the parts of the treatment I was struggling with. Such lovely staff. The embryo transfer went so smoothly and was over and done with in around 5 minutes, again fantastic staff so kind and caring, and was lovely to see our two little embryos on the scan screen smile.

Needing to wee more than usual and when I need to go I feel ready to burst, not sure if this is due to the pessaries. Also woke up feeling nauseous today for about an hour and couldn't bear to eat anything so had some milk instead. Anyone else found this too? Is this a good sign or simply side effects? I think the hospital said that if I have any side effects not to see them as pregnancy signs as it's probably too early for that yet?

Apologies for the long message it's been a while! Hope everyone is OK grin x

ChairOfTheBored Fri 21-Sep-12 08:06:43

So great to have some grin inducing news in the hut.

Thanks for everyone's advice about work - I think I will tell my boss, as my appointments will require some re-jigging of work stuff, and want her to know I'm not being slack. Just have to pluck up the courage...

Still, its Friday, I've got the day off, so it's the weekend already! What is everyone up to?

summerintherosegarden Fri 21-Sep-12 08:32:19

Day off here too! grin But we've got relatives staying this weekend and I have a list as long as my arm of things to get done around the house and garden, so I should probably stop slacking off on the internet and get to it...

Pink, I think you're right, no news is good news. Hopefully sunday morning comes round quickly for you!

Mrs Jones, such an exciting time for you as well! I really, really hope that your needing to wee and nausea are symptoms of a baby/ies (!) on board!

Hope everyone else is well and looking forward to a couple of relaxing days smile

flixy102 Fri 21-Sep-12 10:45:21

Happy Friday everyone! Am on my phone so can't see posts to reply to everyone but its great seeing everyone being positive and happy grin. I'm doubling my medication from next week as my consultant told me to after 4 months if i had no AF. Was hoping it wouldn't get to this bit alas it has!

pinkapples Sat 22-Sep-12 15:47:49

No news from the hospital still must b good then smile should have the pick of all 8 then hopefully grin

Devilforasideboard Sat 22-Sep-12 16:07:05

I was just popping in here to see if you'd heard anything pink smile. Hope all goes smoothly tomorrow.

Hopefully the extra drugs will do the trick Flixy!

wave to everybody else, hope you're having good weekends in the sunshine.

No more nasty side-effects here so far, just a dry mouth and a bit tired. Had a very good day at work yesterday and off out for a curry with DH this evening. Sat here looking v glam with my hair in a clingfilm turban at the moment in preparation grin

pinkapples Sat 22-Sep-12 16:31:16

Awww have fun devil
No, no news
I'm still hurting though so an going to speak to the clinic tomorrow when I go its a really weird sensation like a really bad ache I'm still going to the toilet I think it's cuz the follies were bigger this time that's all I'm hoping it is grin

summerintherosegarden Sun 23-Sep-12 08:59:37

Just popping in to say good luck today pink. I really hope it all goes well, and for you too, devil - love the clingfilm turban smile

pinkapples Sun 23-Sep-12 11:49:08

Morning ladies
On the way back from the clinic now with a 4AA blastocyst on board grin embryologist and nurses were very positive and have 6 blastocyst frosties smile so fingers crossed

Any advice though from those ivf ers on the 2ww clinic said resume normal activities but Internet and others say no driving/sex/orgasms/baths/hard work strenuous activity?? Any ideas? I plan a chilled week anyway since I have it off work I might as well use it I just wondered

HaveALittleFaith Sun 23-Sep-12 12:53:53

Ooh pink, hoping for a sticky blastocyst or two! smile I guess I'd be careful but not overly cautious. Give it a few days to settle, especially since you've had pain.

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