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Strictly Votes - When a person is genuinely sorry for the hurtful words they have said should they be forgiven?

(5 Posts)
seekinginspiration Sat 10-Oct-09 09:41:46

Last summer I took an 82 year old great aunt along with my the kids to the Imperial War Museum. We got the bus back from the museum to the oval tube station and my aunt insulted 95% of bus passengers. She was in front of the children and as she left the bus turned back to me and said 'I've left my head scarf over there next to the coloured man in blue coat'.
She said this very loudly as she is almost deaf. I know this is an insulting term for black people turned back to retrieve the scarf I blushed bright red. The black man, by the way he had an Australian accent, said 'No worries GING", but then instantly seeing my reaction turning to anger he apologised to me. I hate being called GING. I don't mind red head or ginger, although I'm not keen on carrot top, but I accept that people do not realise they are hurting me by using these terms and if they apologise I accept it.
Anton comes across as a very nice man and when my children or people in general are genuinely apologetic for the hurt they cause we encourage them to learn by their mistakes and move on. So I will be voting for Anton and Laila Rouass today, but please don?t call me GING!

OurLadyOfPerpetualSupper Sat 10-Oct-09 09:51:54

What??
Couldn't you have just shrugged and said 'one-all' to the bloke?
He was clearly making light of an awkward sotuation - no need to get on your high horse.
And I speak as the mother of a redhead, and equally hate the g-word.
I haven't seen any of the footage of Anton's apology or subsequent discussion of the matter, but imo saying sorry doesn't change the fact he casually let slip a racist comment - and if I voted at all on Strictly I'd vote on the basis of who was the best dancer - which she is patently not.
Seems a warped reason for voting to me.

seekinginspiration Sat 10-Oct-09 10:12:23

Yes, you are right I should have been able to laugh about it - but you've missed the main point which is about genuine apologies.
I loath being called ging but I would not want someone's career to end because someone called me that name. If the pair go out tonight the Kick 'em in balls British gutter press will make out that the good old british public have declared him a racist and kicked him off the show. No one was voting for Sargeant for the quality of the dancing or for Todd Carty's cartoon-like attempts at ice skating. Sometimes in TV It's not just about the dancing.

OurLadyOfPerpetualSupper Sat 10-Oct-09 10:32:30

I think you'll find his career doesn't end over this - wouldn't surprise me if the Great British Public got right behind him spurred on by the DM - 'PC Gone Mad' type headlines.

Nancy66 Sat 10-Oct-09 10:56:14

I think the guy calling you a 'ginge' is far worse. That was deliberate and spiteful. Your great aunt is from a generation that were taught to use the word 'coloured' and told that 'black' was offensive and insulting.

If you listen to some Stevie Wonder or Marvin Gaye songs and you'll hear plenty of references to the 'coloured' man.

I heard Anton's apology on TV yesterday, it sounded heartfelt. I don't think he should lose his job and I doubt he will.

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