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40 Reasons not to have children - book

(59 Posts)
Judy1234 Sun 08-Jul-07 10:13:44

Description of a book in the Sunday Times from France which is interesting - 40 reasons not to have children.

Anna8888 Sun 08-Jul-07 10:33:03

Sure, there is much more pressure on women to have children here - if you get to thirty without children (as I did) you get harsh words from your gynaecologist, anyone interviewing you for a job etc. Women who reach 30 without children are considered very strange, and by 35 you are just extraterrestrial and ought to be on the psychoanalyst's couch.

So, yes, that much is true.

Author of book in question isn't much cop however

madamez Sun 08-Jul-07 21:36:26

Well, it's certainly possible to make a better moral and ethical case for not having children than it is for having them.

southeastastra Sun 08-Jul-07 21:44:43

from the link:
Just imagine. There’d be fewer of us around so rents would be cheaper, it would be easier to get a job and there’d be fewer traffic jams.

“And if people didn’t have to think about their kids all the time, they’d think about what they really want and just go out and do it.”

weird outlook on life

Anna8888 Mon 09-Jul-07 08:01:30

madamemez - really?

I can't think of any moral/ethical arguments for not having children, personally

Which doesn't mean I like the pressure on women to have children here in France - I think it leads to women having children out of a sense of duty, and then they don't enjoy them much

UnquietDad Mon 09-Jul-07 09:56:04

She sounds a bundle of laughs, doesn't she? I bet she loves going to see impenetrable arty black-and-white films and and discussing their philosophical ramifications with her lover in poncy cafes.

Where exactly is this "baby-mania" she speaks of? FFS, if you want to have children, have them, and if you don't, then don't.

FioFio Mon 09-Jul-07 09:57:38

Message withdrawn

edam Mon 09-Jul-07 09:58:56

Tricky to get an advance for a book saying 'Oh, I dunno, have them if you want them and don't if you don't' though, UD?

UnquietDad Mon 09-Jul-07 09:59:44

Well, quite... she even admits the book is 50% deliberate polemic!

UnquietDad Mon 09-Jul-07 10:01:38

Corinne Maier

eeek! scary!!!!

Kathyis6incheshigh Mon 09-Jul-07 10:03:48

Why scary? Because she wears glasses and not very much make up?

UnquietDad Mon 09-Jul-07 10:16:04

I was thinking more of the penetrating stare.

And the glasses are odd...

Anna8888 Mon 09-Jul-07 10:23:49

UnquietDad - "babymania" - in France you get medals and reductions on trains, in museums etc if you are a "famille nombreuse" (mother with three or more children).

UnquietDad Mon 09-Jul-07 11:03:37

Sounds a good idea!
Do you still get them if you are a father?

Anna8888 Mon 09-Jul-07 11:07:20


The medals are for mothers.

So, my partner who has 3 children but with two different mothers gets nothing.

Personally, I think that's the right idea in France given the average level of paternal involvement in childrearing .

UnquietDad Mon 09-Jul-07 11:09:39

Anna - or it could be that cause and effect are reversed....

UnquietDad Mon 09-Jul-07 11:11:49

So, let me get it right, if Pierre and Sabine have trois gosses, entitling sabine to a "famille nombreuse" reduction at the musee, and, say, Sabine has a lie-in one day while Pierre takes them out, he doesn't get the reduction on the door because they are avec Papa and not avec Maman?

Anna8888 Mon 09-Jul-07 11:13:41

Yes, it's famille nombreuse.

But Pierre doesn't get a medal .

UnquietDad Mon 09-Jul-07 11:16:39

If they introduced medals for fathers it might work quite well! So that if a dad changes a nappy and proudly goes on about it, when DW says "What do you want, a medal?", he can say, "Actually, yes!"

Anna8888 Mon 09-Jul-07 11:18:42

I think in France quite a lot of fathers already have a few children they don't own up to so I'm not sure that the country is in the business of encouraging fathers too much .

Oblomov Mon 09-Jul-07 11:32:18

Love UQD's Pierre and Sabine.

madamez Mon 09-Jul-07 15:19:48

Anna8888: in an overpopulated world, with many unwanted, homeless children starving, it would be more ethical to sterilise yourself and adopt, if you want to parent.

(THat's the ethical argument, BTW, not my personal case history)

Anna8888 Mon 09-Jul-07 15:22:54

madamez - I don't buy that argument

madamez Mon 09-Jul-07 15:26:44

Anna8888 fair enough. But what's the ethical argument for having one's own children?

expatinscotland Mon 09-Jul-07 15:28:20

Dear God, Corinne!

This doesn't happen often, but I agree w/UD, she's truly chilling.

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