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5 yr old girl "snatched" in Wales

(535 Posts)
mumblechum1 Tue 02-Oct-12 04:38:29

Let's all keep our eyes peeled sad

usualsuspect3 Tue 02-Oct-12 17:37:22

To say 'I hope the learned their lesson' is a disgusting thing to say.

OhSoSimple Tue 02-Oct-12 17:38:19

Nobody said that!!!!!

usualsuspect3 Tue 02-Oct-12 17:40:24

That poor poor child and her parents, and all you can do is sit in judgment. Makes me sick to read crap like that on a parenting site.

OhSoSimple Tue 02-Oct-12 17:43:00

Who has say in judgement?!?! I certainly haven't and to quote something that hasn't been said is nuts. Someone used the term "a lesson learnt" but in a very specific context.

Everyone on here has expressed how much they hope that poor little girl is returned promptly and safely to her parents. Goodness knows what they must be feeling. Please stop trying to insinuate anyone has said otherwise.

CheerfulYank Tue 02-Oct-12 17:44:55

My DS is five and plays alone in our backyard all the time. I can see him if I look out the window, but...if he wanted to play with older children nearby, would I let him? Maybe.

This is not her parents fault. Elizabeth Smart was snatched from her own bed, for crying out loud. Was that her parents' fault?

Poor, poor little girl and her poor family. They must be in agony. I hope she is found.

usualsuspect3 Tue 02-Oct-12 17:45:51

Oh FGS, 'Another one in the eye for lax parenting'

Explain that then?

DisappointedHorse Tue 02-Oct-12 17:46:54

OhSoSimple, yes they did. Cazboldy said it on the first page.

Poor little girl, praying for her safe return. After growing up in a small village, now a small town I had ridiculous amounts of freedom from a very young age so I feel for her parents.

People have very different levels of comfort depending on personal circumstances and experiences. Blaming them only tries serves to reassure the blamers it will never happen to them. No, but something else might.

OhSoSimple Tue 02-Oct-12 17:50:17

I agree cheerfulYank, there are lots of examples of children being abducted from their homes/gardens/hotel rooms. we live rurally in a village and children do not play out as such here, however we lived in a cul-de-sac in a large town a few years ago and all the children, some younger than 5, used to play outside.

Unfortunately there was a spate of attempted abductions. Disgusting that there are people who will think nothing of using an opportunity to snatch an innocent child.

OhSoSimple Tue 02-Oct-12 17:52:13

disappointedhorse she did not say "I hope they learn their lesson" she said she hoped the child would return safe and sound and it would be a "lesson learnt". They intimate totally different things! She clearly meant that hopefully it will all end well. It's cruel to try and twist her wording.

usualsuspect3 Tue 02-Oct-12 17:52:52

No it was cruel for her to say it in the first place.

OhSoSimple Tue 02-Oct-12 17:53:13

usualsuspect I can't comment about that as I don't even understand what it means!!!!!!!

Chubfuddler Tue 02-Oct-12 17:53:52

I can't see any difference between the two actually. And I'm probably the most tiresome pedant on MN.

OhSoSimple Tue 02-Oct-12 17:53:56

Xost meant that thing bout lax parenting whatever that is/meant.

Chubfuddler Tue 02-Oct-12 17:55:45

No, I meant I can't see any difference between "hope its a lesson learned" and "hope they learn their lesson".

Narked Tue 02-Oct-12 17:56:22

Why does this always happen? The thing that every parent dreads happens to some poor people and fuckwits start picking them apart.

Fobwatch Tue 02-Oct-12 17:57:36

It's called the "Just World Hypothesis".

It's a form of cognitive dissonance that people engage it..."I would never let my children play out alone / play out that late / in the dark / wear such a short skirt / walk down a dark alley [insert perceived risky behaviour] so I / my child will be safe and nothing bad will happen".

It's a way of trying to convincing oneself that one can exert control over events such that determined criminals / rapists / paedophiles are responsible for by suggesting the victim or victims families just did not do enough.

OhSoSimple Tue 02-Oct-12 17:58:00

Well perhaps cazbody was being heartless and cruel. I didn't read it like that and get all hysterical about it. What she said was badly worded but I think being called heartless, cruel eyc etc is a huge overreaction. It seemed pretty clear she was trying to say she hoped that the girl came back safely and the parents could put it down to experience. Whichever way you look at it that is the best outcome. They certainly wouldnt let her out to play again would they as they would be too petrified.

It's a horrible thing to happen to a family, and ultimately they have been very very unlucky.

DisappointedHorse Tue 02-Oct-12 17:59:37

"hard not to judge..... a 5yo playing out unsupervised at that time" and "they have a chance to learn their lesson" So who is they? I'm not trying to twist her wording but honestly? Come on!

Sorry to use you an example cazboldy but let's face it. You did judge.

Victim blaming right royally pisses me off.

OhSoSimple Tue 02-Oct-12 18:02:56

The girl is the victim she didn't blame her.

You missed out where she said she hoped the girl was returned safely.

Chubfuddler Tue 02-Oct-12 18:03:58

Oh shut up all of you.

They've got the coastguard searching a river now.

OhSoSimple Tue 02-Oct-12 18:04:13

You have picked out the bits to suit your outrage just as some posters are focused on the fact she was playing out alone at 7pm.

EdMcDunnough Tue 02-Oct-12 18:05:38

I read somewhere that they had all just returned from a parents' evening at school about 10 minutes earlier.

It looks like a very quiet estate, there were other children with her. It doesn't sound beyond the realms of 'safe' to me at all.

And bad things happen to children who are in 'safe' environments - depending on who is around and decides to do something disruptive.

I don't think these poor parents did ANYthing wrong, and yes I have a 5yo myself, and I don't live somewhere that it would be very safe to let him out at 7pm but from the looks of it they made a rational and competent decision and it wasn't their fault anything went wrong sad

MrFlibble Tue 02-Oct-12 18:05:45

What lesson's are there to be learnt? A child was playing with friends outside her own house. It was not her or her parents fault that she was abducted.

And why are people banging on about 7pm being too late for her to be out? Is there some rule saying people of a dodgy character and inclination to abduct children are not allowed out before evening time that I don't know about? confused

RubixCube Tue 02-Oct-12 18:09:34

FGS she was late out because she had gone to a parent conference and her mum let her out to play with friends for a few minutes.She wasnt left out all night.Im sure the poor parents feel alot of guilt.But no ones to blame exept the disgusting scum that took her

Posterofapombear Tue 02-Oct-12 18:14:18

I live about 15 miles away and to say it is a quiet safe area is an understatement. People leave their keys in cars, doors unlocked and children play out.

It's normally like living in the '50's.

But even if it wasn't it is only the perpetrators fault.

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