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Young mum takes child from hospital

(44 Posts)

link to local news site

I'm confused by this? Police has said that they have no reason to believe they are in any danger. The post on their facebook says "we have no reason to believe they are higher risk than any mother and new baby"
So basically, the news is "woman takes own baby home from hospital"?
They havent been officially discharged, but this isnt breaking the law is it?
Yes shes 19, but last I checked, 19 is an adult!!

I had dreadful care after DS2 was born. Left in the same sheets i gave birth in, in a cold room, dithering my ass off, for well over an hour. Fortunately i was so wrapped up in DS that i gave not a single shit. DP changed and dressed DS and helped me into the shower. He was brilliant really.

I wouldn't want to give birth in that hospital again and this was in 2009 so its got worse, not better. The hospital i had DD and DS1 in had closed sad good care there, both clean and fresh and dressed quickly, they did keep me in for longer though whereas with DS2 i could have left quicker if DP had brought the car seat smile

Anyway..... the girl is not learning difficulty or the parents violent she is running as she does not want her child taken from her without even being given chance to show she can be a good mum

we need to really change how ss is run in this country. they are meant to support parents not frighten them.

I wasn't scared of them by the time DS2 came along, there were vague threats from their corner, nothing concrete. I think i rattled their cage so much during the case with DD that they didn't want to touch me with a bargepole. I feel so sorry for people who have babies taken from their arms .. That should not happen in a civilised country. I hope one day people look back in shock and say 'they used to do WHAT!?!?'

I hope mum and baby are well, and safe. If SS is involved or intending to be, i hope they have left this crappy country. Far behind. And go on to have a happy life, together, without having to prove themselves to people with expectaions that are too high and impossible to achieve.

edam Wed 26-Sep-12 23:22:21

Hope Mother and baby are both somewhere safe and doing well.

inthefamily Wed 26-Sep-12 16:44:55

terrifying edam and so much about forced adoption on the net not surprising if panic set in

edam Wed 26-Sep-12 14:47:18

Oh, sounds like a very sad situation, inthefamily.

margerykemp Wed 26-Sep-12 09:39:00

we need to really change how ss is run in this country. they are meant to support parents not frighten them.

inthefamily Wed 26-Sep-12 09:23:08

the girl is not learning difficulty or the parents violent she is running as she does not want her child taken from her without even being given chance to show she can be a good mum

It wasnt the most awful care for me, but I had no need to be there, second child, booked for a homebirth but had to be induced, he was born at 5.30am and I was told I could go home as soon as DS had been checked by the paediatrician. Except she was busy (obv not complaining about that, I guess she had more important things to do!), which meant I was on the ward for nearly 48hrs longer than I needed to be, and that must effect the care given to the women who do need it?

maxmillie Sun 23-Sep-12 18:02:33

boffin et al I did the same at 33! post natal care in most UK hospitals can be appalling from my experience and others - you basically have to threaten to leave, or actually do it, before anyone will pay you any attention. I too was warned of dire consequences, your baby might die etc, you must force feed him formula before you will be allowed to leave, you must endure days of sleep deprivation in a filthy ward with a mentally ill women screaming all night and other people's visitors spitting on the floor. Bastards!

I must stress this was at St Thomas' 2004 - sure the care has (must?!) have got better .....

second and third time at local hospital I was out of there like a shot and so never actually saw the PN ward.

If she does have special circumstances, as seems to be the case, I hope she wasn't treated as badly as I and others on this thread were otherwise no wonder she's done a runner.

edam Sun 23-Sep-12 15:00:03

That particular hospital, iam?

iamstitch Sat 22-Sep-12 17:36:27

I've walked out of there too and don't ever intend to return. The care there is the worst.

Birdsgottafly Sat 22-Sep-12 17:32:01

Do your local newspapers not have reports on missing vulnerable adults, then?

Every area has its own website.

They can be deemed as vulnerable, for a varity of reasons.

Birdsgottafly Sat 22-Sep-12 17:29:16

No, I disappeared off from the hospital before the relevant checks. Read da post

This mum has completely disappeared she hasn't gone home, read the report.

RabidCarrot Sat 22-Sep-12 17:21:40

I think there must be more then the police are saying, surly she is not the first person to leave a hospital without being discharged. They must have an address for her so it is worrying if she is not home but hardly news

edam Sat 22-Sep-12 17:07:27

This may be entirely irrelevant to the missing mother but since we've got onto hideous post-natal care...

I was soooo tempted to help my sister escape from the hideous bullying midwives in the post-natal ward. They were stupid bitches, who got all over-excited that she was on anti-depressants even though a. she'd taken medical advice about this and everything else throughout pregnancy and the doctors and every other midwife up to that point were happy and b. was a student nurse herself at the time.

Her baby was fine wrt diabetes, thankfully, but the 'care' of my sister was awful, leaving her extremely stressed (midwives wouldn't let her rest with her baby). I did wonder if they'd read the wrong notes and got her confused with someone who was known to social services, they were so hostile. The only reason my sister didn't discharge herself was their attitude was so bizarre she worried that they'd contact social services with some invented concern if she did.

Those bitches of midwives did everything they could to make b/f fail, while nagging and criticizing my sister and bossing her about the importance of b/f (which she was perfectly happy to try). Bitches. If the ward this woman left is anything like that, I have ever sympathy with her.

BoffinMum Sat 22-Sep-12 16:44:46

No, I disappeared off from the hospital before the relevant checks. Read da post.

Birdsgottafly Sat 22-Sep-12 15:44:09

I did exactly the same thing at 19

So you never returned home, or told anyone where you where?

I then phoned the midwife and GP and asked them to do the checks at my home.

So you didn't do the same thing, then?

SchrodingersMew Sat 22-Sep-12 15:37:03

Boffin Almost identical to what happened to me.

If hospitals don't want incidents like this then post-natal care needs vastlt improved. As it is just now I am sure prison inmates get better care.

BoffinMum Sat 22-Sep-12 15:32:17

I did exactly the same thing at 19 after being completely ignored in hospital for about 12 hours apart from when staff members told me off for various 'infractions' (one of the crimes being taking my baby with me to the breakfast room with me, as apparently babies were not allowed in there hmm and realising there was little in the way of care, and that the place was filthy. I asked to have the final checks done and they kept coming up with excuses for me to carry on hanging around and hanging around, so in the end I called a taxi and got myself home. I then phoned the midwife and GP and asked them to do the checks at my home.

LemarchandsBox Sat 22-Sep-12 15:31:00

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Birdsgottafly Sat 22-Sep-12 15:24:55

It sounds as though the mum hasn't returned to her home and she hasn't contacted the hospital or police, to say that she is well, so that should be a concern.

There could be numerous reasons, she may have come from a shelter for DV victims, for example.

Police (and services) obviously don't want to cause her distress, but need to know that her and the baby is well. The baby has that right of protection, as well as mum, whomay be vulnerable for other reasons.

Without knowing the circumstances, the police cannot be criticised at this stage.

Confusion can follow blood loss etc.

It shouldn't be needed to tell the world her business/past, at this stage.

Her picture has been released.

SchrodingersMew Sat 22-Sep-12 15:23:51

Thanks for the hug. smile Just saying that there might be reasons she left that hospital, for all we know she might have feared for her own safety or her childs, we don't know what the conditions were like (and they can be disgraceful sometimes).

It says she "discharged herself" before health checks were done, well that's not just running away from the hospital, that is signing discharge forms. If they were really that worried they could have arranged the checks at that time or if they knew she was leaving and it was a child protection problem, called security.

Something about this story is strange and just smacks of 'we own you and your child and you can't have them unless we say so.'

LemarchandsBox Sat 22-Sep-12 15:15:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SchrodingersMew Sat 22-Sep-12 14:57:46

They let me leave on the premise that DS would stay in SCBU until morning (8am) as they thought he possibly had withdrawl from the painkillers I was given during pg, they let him out nearly 3 days later saying that he had never shown any signs at all, I had to agree to BF before they would let me take him as they wanted to keep him in longer, I ended up crying, begging saying I wasn't able to bond, all it took was me bloody agreeing to bf..


Sorry, went off on a bit of an emotional tangent there but this news story has hit a nerve.

SchrodingersMew Sat 22-Sep-12 14:54:22

So basically a "Woman" has left the hospital with her baby. You only have to stay something like 3 hours don't you?

I remember when I had DS a few of us almost felt imprisoned as we weren't allowed to leave before checks but they kept saying that it would be done soon and it never happened when they said it would.

I was left in the same sheets from right after I had DS, covered in blood etc, wasn't given Ibuprofen even after asking (episiotomy, forceps, ruptured stitches and haematoma), I have a crazy phobia of hospitals and was having panic attacks because of it and was in so much pain it was murder to get up to DS with no help around. I ended up begging for him to be checked at 1am after being told all day it would happen, they checked him and wouldn't let me leave with him saying he was "jittery" of course he bloody was, this happened when she had stripped him down in a cold room!

I don't blame her if she left if the hospital was even nearly the same as the one I was at.

edam Sat 22-Sep-12 14:35:19

Or an over-zealous social worker, or genuine fears for the wellbeing of a woman who is vulnerable in some way that we don't know about (beyond the normal for a new Mother).

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