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England rugby players and lewd comments to hotel worker

(53 Posts)
Gigondas Sun 02-Oct-11 11:09:34

Link here apology for lewd comments

Assuming this is true (assumption here I know) , the elements of bullying , sexual harassment are really unpleasant. Thought about posting this in feminism but something about this makes me feel deeply depressed as a rugby fan.

GypsyMoth Sun 02-Oct-11 11:13:55

Rugby? Well makes a change, its usually football!

Scootergrrrl Sun 02-Oct-11 11:24:08

Horrid behaviour.
Although if she was so concerned the incident would be made public, why has she talked to the Mirror hmm?

CogitoErgoSometimes Sun 02-Oct-11 11:28:01

Sports team larks about in puerile fashion on tour and goes too far... is a hardy perennial. They've got egg on their faces and apologised. She's embarassed but OK with all the details being in the national press. I think you'd struggle to interpret this as bullying.

Maryz Sun 02-Oct-11 11:44:28

I think the sentence "her lawyer entered into talks with the England legal team" has hidden meaning.

Either their behaviour was so inappropriate that she felt frightened, believes they are guilty of a criminal offense - in which case why didn't she call the police.

Or she is looking for money [cynical].

Over the top juvenile behaviour, probably. And definitely not very nice. But why does she have to leave her job - presumably they are no longer staying there confused.

EdithWeston Sun 02-Oct-11 11:46:04

Actually, I think the duty manager is also at fault for sending her into the room in the first place.

Of course this doesn't absolve the players. But intelligent management action could have avoided the whole incident.

SoupDragon Sun 02-Oct-11 11:53:48

I think it was just stupid juvenile behaviour on the part of the players. it appears it was only verbal banter, albeit crude, and no one tried to force her to do anything or physically harass her.

Personally I would have left the radio and got my manager to retrieve it and tel the players to back off.

Not entirely sure why lawyers were involved.

Maryz Sun 02-Oct-11 12:07:13

I presume that when at something like a world cup there is hours and hours of hanging around between training sessions/meals/journeys/matches.

Overgrown children get bored and entertain themselves with pranks hmm. The sensible option is to tell them to grow up and find themselves something else to do. The modern alternative is to sue them.

CogitoErgoSometimes Sun 02-Oct-11 12:09:17

"why does she have to leave her job".. reading the article it looks as though the hotel wanted her to accept the apology from the team and moved her onto other duties, she doesn't think an apology is adequate compensation (mentions that the England team has plenty of money), and that she doesn't think her employer has been on her side. If she goes after the hotel for constructive dismissal, I wouldn't be surprised.

Maryz Sun 02-Oct-11 12:19:19

I suppose my sympathy tends to go from people once they start looking for money [sceptical]. Had she written to the rugby union stating that their behaviour was over the top and offensive, and asking for an official written apology (but not mentioned anything about money) I would be much more sympathetic.

It must be a nightmare keeping all those guys occupied (not excusing their behaviour by the way - they really need to grow up).

ImpYCelyn Sun 02-Oct-11 12:23:21

I don't understand why people look for money in these instances. If it was me I would want a proper apology and ideally an indication that the players had been disciplined and something was being done to ensure it doesn't happen again.

What possible good can getting cash off them do, except be an easy way to make cash? I think you lose the moral high ground a bit at that point.

purits Sun 02-Oct-11 12:29:02

Why has it only come to light now, just when we have qualified from the Group stage. It's the NZ press trying to derail us.

It was silly banter and she should have been able to cope with tricky customers - that's her job.

scarlettsmummy2 Sun 02-Oct-11 12:32:19

Hardly surprising in light of their captains recent behaviour.

MmeLindor. Sun 02-Oct-11 12:38:14

It is not her job to cope with behaviour like that.

It is her job to serve snacks and assist the team.

Not to spend time tracking down her walkie talkie, because the oh-so-hilarious childish players kept stealing it.

Saying that, she should have went to her boss the first time it happened, and they should have been told to lay off. It seems like it was tolerated for too long.

The hotel should have dealt with it better.

Gigondas Sun 02-Oct-11 12:39:45

I think if it was just banter when she was out and about in reception, restaurant etc , I'd agree that it would be complain and be done with it (if you work in a hotel/hospitality , they can't be the first drunken twits you have come across).

However allegedly she was invited/told to go to their room to pick up the missing radio was the issue (Agree edith, soupdragon that prob shouldnt have gone)-that was the bit I found ott (ie it was beyond stupid banter) .

yes -the press is going to town on england (I do wonder how interesting to the press the tindall thing would be if his wife wasn't related to the queen).

TeamDamon Sun 02-Oct-11 12:42:13

A very odd story: she definitely seems to be after something. What on earth did she involve a lawyer for? - massive overreaction. I can't help feeling that had this just been a group of anonymous men on a conference or something, she wouldn't have made so much of it. It seems that she is looking for more than an apology (the reference to how much money England has left a bad taste in my mouth).

TBH, I would have either left the walkie-talkie where it was or - since it was so obviously taken to lure the woman up to the room, simply sent a male colleague up to get it for me.

Honeydragon Sun 02-Oct-11 12:51:35

This depresses me. How will people learn that this sort of behaviour is not on unless it is across the board, the cynic in me says that if it was last year and a generic Rugby team on a lads holiday and this had happened as reported a lawyer would not have been involved.

They should have been told off and made to apologise, and if they didn't mean it reprimanded.

CogitoErgoSometimes Sun 02-Oct-11 15:43:15

As an aside... does anyone actually use the word 'lewd' in regular conversation or, like 'tryst' and 'boffin', is it one only used in newspaper articles?

Gigondas Sun 02-Oct-11 15:44:02

No

Gigondas Sun 02-Oct-11 15:44:44

I think it is mainly tabloid speak

Runoutofideas Sun 02-Oct-11 19:42:38

If she was genuinely upset by the initial banter she would not have gone to the room herself to retrieve the walkie-talkie. She should have reported the fact that they had taken it to the manager and got him/her to retrieve it and give the guys a warning about their behaviour. The fact that she did go and get it herself shows to me that she didn't feel the slightest bit intimidated and is now after whatever she can get from the incident. Their behaviour was abhorrent but my sympathy for the girl involved is nil.

StewieGriffinsMom Sun 02-Oct-11 21:18:29

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

slug Sun 02-Oct-11 21:36:42

See, this is NZ. The first place in the world to give women the vote. The country with the longest serving female head of state in the Western world. Despite the blokey sterotype, NZ is a good place to be a woman. Your average kiwi woman will put up with a lot less of the sort of sexist shit than is the norm in the UK. She may have refused to show she was intimidated, but that does not mean she should have to, nor would she expect to have to put up with that sort of behaviour.

I find her reaction entirely consistent with someone who has been brought up to expect to be treated with respect. I also find her behavior consistent with someone who had a job to do and needed a vital piece of equipment to do it.

I suspect the money comment was about the disparity between professional sports players and a lowly paid hotel worker who couldn't afford to lose her job because the guests were making it impossible to do it.

begonyabampot Mon 03-Oct-11 00:12:12

Reading many of these comments, what hope have women got not to be treated like this as part of their everyday life - if even women stick the boot in, never mind the idiot guys that act like this. Wouldn't it be nice if your daughters didn't have to put up with this crap now and in the future. Or, should we just be expected to deal with it and toughen up.

JimmyS Mon 03-Oct-11 02:55:14

So their response to a formal demand for an apology was to buy some flowers and start sniffing her?

If their decision making on the field is half this bad they're coming home next weekend.

"The country with the longest serving female head of state in the Western world."

I think we're familiar with her.

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