Finally losing the sentimentality...(10 Posts)
I'm in the process (it's a long slow one) of getting rid of "stuff" out of the house. So far I've done my and his wardrobes, and have been totally ruthless and not regretted it. I think there were about 10 black bags between us!
Clothes are easy, but this morning I've managed to finally liberate 3 drawers of my dressing table by getting rid of all my jewellery boxes-the little ones which you get jewellery in when you're buying it. I have a beautiful big Stackers jewellery box which all my jewellery is in, so why was I hanging on to those generic little boxes? Even the ones my engagement and wedding rings came in have been chucked!
I've even managed to throw out a pair of size 14 "one day I'll get back into them" jeans-they've been in my wardrobe unworn for the best part of 25 years, amd have moved house twice!!
I've always been ridiculously sentimental about "stuff", but it's like someone's flicked a switch this stuff isn't making me happy, but all the "stuff" in the house has been making me very unhappy....A friend of mine has nothing in her attic, when something's finished with, it goes, I don't know that I'll ever get to that stage, but somewhere close to it would be good.
Has anyone else switched off their sentimentality with "stuff"? Did you regret it?
I'm trying my best! I've posted on here before about my spare room which is filled with 'stuff'! Like you I'm amazed at what I've been hanging onto. I'm finding it liberating getting rid of things but despite taking so much to the tip I still have lots to go. How is this possible?!
I'm the same, the house doesn't actually look any different yet!
I've done that with baby things. I had a suitcase full of "stuff" from ds1 that ended up all over the floor one day and as the suitcase zip had broken I had nowhere to keep everything so I decided it all had to go (I've kept hair and hospital bracelets for all 3 dc.
I've also had a clear out of pictures that they've drawn and only keep certain ones.
I can be ruthless with other stuff as I don't really have anything sentimental apart from the dc's bits and bobs but dp can be a hoarder so that's how my house always end up a shit tip and always feel I suffer from CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome)
In fact I've just done a couple of tip runs today of cardboard (dp prolific online shopper!) and old toys - got lots more stuff to shift but I feel better already!
I'm ruthless with clothes. I always end up looking for something a month later only to remember I chucked it!
Still very sentimental about other things though, like old concert tickets/travel passes/leaflets from holidays etc
I'm pretty ruthless and have got much better at chucking as I go. For example, I read 3 books on holiday (just returned yesterday and on mammoth laundry mission...urgh!) and I gave them to the kids club reps to read as I knew that I wouldn't read them again. Also, I've lost a lot of weight in tha last year so loads of clothes have gone to charity. I tend to have a huge clear-out every summer and have just been buying some storage bags and vac bags for the ottoman storage bed in our DD's room which, by the end of this weekend, will house all spare duvets, holiday stuff such as bikinis and beach towels and Halloween, Easter and Christmas decs as well as a few bits and bobs.
I have a smallish memory box with DD's things in, a special box with acid free paper for my wedding dress- I'll never part with that and, to be fair, DD does sometimes persuade me to play dress up with her so on that goes. I've also a storage box in the living room with photos, race medals and other sentimental bits but I do 'cull' this from time to time.
The things I'm stuck with are baby clothes. I've got this down to two bags. We have one DD and are in the process of trying to adopt a second child and I know, realistically, that we won't have a baby placed with us but it makes me feel physically sick thinking about putting these clothes to charity. Not so much sentimentality I suppose but more wistfulness at what never was and almost closing a door to a dream. We've the space for them but I don't think it actually does my state of mind much good.
Our house is pretty clutter free if you disregard DD's huge collection of pink and purple glittery obnoxious Barbie/pony/Littlest Pet Shop characters but it'd be good to have some advice re the baby stuff. Sigh.
I'm getting better at being ruthless, especially with books-they're just taking up space we don't really have. We have a couple of kindles in the house, and whilst there are some books which will be kept, there's no reason to keep generic paperbacks in the way we have.
I've listed a few things on gumtree and yesterday I managed to sell a lamp I'd bought 18 years ago for the price I bought it for!
Sage I wouldn't know what would be the best thing for you to do with these clothes, but I don't know if you're ready to pass them on just yet, but then it's a difficult balance to find if you feel by hanging onto them they're almost taunting you.
Memory boxes are great, I have one for dd and one for ds-they're not huge-probably slightly bigger than a large shoe box, but that means that it really is only the significant things that go in them
sage I've just had a cull of baby clothes (ds1-9, dd-7, ds2-21mo). I actually found it easier getting rid of dc3's clothes first, as soon as he's grown out of an age stage, I choose my favourites to keep, then wash and sell the other stuff on eBay.
It made it easier to go through the other baby stuff then from ds1 and dd and do the same. I started last Christmas as we really needed some extra cash, and I've found it helps to think I'm letting go of it to help make new memories. I still have a way to go as still cling onto a fair bit and I've had the odd pang of regret (over selling a stash of dd's babygros! - 6-7 years old babygros I should add!) but whenever I feel sad I ask myself well if I had them would I actually get them out and do something with them??
I'm just wondering if you might be able to sell some of your dd's stuff and either use the money for something special for her, or donate to a charity close to your heart?
Getting everything out though and looking through. I really thought hard about 'what here do I love now (as opposed to having loved when I bought it, so looking objectively)?' and 'if I had a new baby would I want to put him/her in these?' Also, 'would not having these stop me from having a third baby if it was possible/appropriate to do so?'
I was surprised at how aged the clothes were - things I remembered having loved were stained/worn and everything was very musty from being stored! I've put this on another thread so sorry for repeating, but looking at some baby things also brought up a feeling of stress in me, as I was stressed/worried when I bought them, so it was a relief to let them go.
I kept a few very special bits and a few that had made me smile to see them (probably 1%). Everything else has gone.
I also have got rid of older dc's clothes that I saved for future children. When toddler dc was born I loved bringing her home in a babygro that had been older dc's. It gave me a feeling of continuity. But now I love shopping for the little one and somehow the older one's outgrown clothes don't look right - perhaps my tastes, or what's available etc have changed?
So, in true Marie Kondo style, I'm thanking all of those old clothes for clothing /protecting my dc when they were tiny and hoping that other people's dc have the same pleasure in the future.
It makes me smile now to think of the tiny amount of very special things that are stored now, as I know looking at them will give me pleasure in the future. I hadn't realised that the huge sacks of stuff stored (in vacuum sacks in the loft, so not exactly impacting on my life I'd have thought) were weighing me down, but they definitely were.
I definitely think you have to be in the right frame of mind to do this though, I couldn't have done it 6/12 months ago.
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