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Sentimental hoarding- how to help friend. Advice needed

(9 Posts)
Purpleraindrops Mon 24-Mar-14 22:22:43

I have a friend who is a bit of a hoarder. She knows it's an issue and doesn't know what to do. The latest problem is that she has a car and hardly drives it as she prefers smaller cars. However, she cannot bear to part with it for sentimental reasons. She hates the car because she finds it difficult to drive yet cannot bear to part with it because of the sentimental reasons.

I'm at a loss how to help her. Any advice?

silversmith Mon 24-Mar-14 22:39:55

I'm a hoarder too - mostly kept in check these days by a husband and a series of burglaries! Since your friend sounds like the lovely, sentimental type of hoarder (would she feel sorry for the car, or as if she'd let it down if she got rid of it), could you (or even better, she) find a family who really NEED a bigger car, and sell it to them for a cheap price? I found it much easier to give stuff away to a pathetically grateful person than to throw stuff away. Win-win, stuff gone, fuzzy glow from helping someone in need.

Purpleraindrops Mon 24-Mar-14 22:58:20

Hi silversmith

Oh no sorry to hear that about the burglaries.

I have talked to her in the past about selling it to someone in need as there was someone I knew. Although she felt terrible for them she said she was worried about how she would feel at the loss of the car and the sentiments attached. She felt that the loss of car/sentiments would be too overwhelming . Any other thoughts, ideas?

silversmith Mon 24-Mar-14 23:07:24

Some people find that taking a photo of things they're going to let go of helps. Not sure that would have worked for me - I'd end up with a hoard of dusty photos, but might be worth a shot. Give the car a blog maybe? Photos & memories recorded for posterity?

silversmith Mon 24-Mar-14 23:12:21

Also - it depends what her sentimental reasons actually are. If she shared the car with someone who's no longer around, that could be a tricksy one...

Purpleraindrops Mon 24-Mar-14 23:23:28

That sounds like my friend too. She would end up with a hoard of photos. However in her case it would be because she would be worried about losing one photo that she would have multiple backups.

Didn't think of that, will suggest the blog idea to her tomorrow and report back.

Maisie0 Fri 11-Apr-14 15:31:46

Gosh .. you guys are good... This is me.
It is quite cute how you guys suggest to take a photo to replace the item. smile

homeaway Sat 12-Apr-14 14:22:34

I think you will only be able to help her when she opens up as to why she feels she has to keep it( what does she think will happen when she gets rid of it ?). Another solution to photos is to make a photo book of memories that way they are all in one place. I have just made a photo book of some artwork which my ds did which i have no space to keep anymore .

Meglet Sat 12-Apr-14 14:31:05

I've got a pile of my ancient soft toys in the loft, can't bear to part with them and they're too scruffy to pass on. The only way I think I can deal with it is by cutting them up to make a patchwork cushion hmm and recycle the rest.

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