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Why can't I get my $hit together

(9 Posts)
jesstheworstmum Sun 19-May-13 10:16:27

I'm back
I'm doing crap
My house is a mess
I can't get it or keep it together
Why am I so lazy

27cats Sun 19-May-13 10:44:52

It's so hard isn't it? I'm in similar boat. Spend time on MN because I'm fed up using my free time on chores. Want to be doing something for me, even though the state of the house really gets me down. Lack of self-discipline in my case I reckon. Hope you find some encouragement and motivation Jess.

daisydalrymple Sun 19-May-13 23:29:12

Just try and make a list of one or two things that you can get done in each room. Do a couple of things each day. Then look back at the end of the week and see how much you've done. Start again next week. Doesn't matter if the first few weeks are lists of 'put washing away' 'hoover living room' 'clean bath' etc, you can add more stuff that makes more impact as the weeks go by and you get a routine going.
Oh, and make sure you put time in to sit on sofa and watch tv/read magazine/ eat chocolate/ listen to rock music etc.
What size is your house?
Do you have DCs?
Do you work f/t p/t?

HoneyStepMummy Mon 20-May-13 19:39:57

You're not crap. The reason you can't stay on top of things is because it's bloody hard work and overwhelming.
I find what really helps is thinking of getting organized as a two step plan;

1) Take 2 weeks to a month to get the house really sorted out
2) Create a plan on stay on top of things

I organize be breaking down each room shelf by shelf drawer by drawer. This way even if you only get a couple of drawers done in a day you are still working towards your goal. Use a timer if you feel like you get distracted. Do say 20 minutes of organizing then take a break and do some MN and have a cuppa. Be ruthless- throw out anything you haven't used in 12 months. Things that you want to keep like momentos, books etc that don't need to be out should be boxed up, labled and put in the attic (or store somewhere else).

Once you feel the place is sorted try to do a bit of cleaning every day, but keep it simple. For example I spray and wipe the counters, make the beds, spray and wipe the loo and take the rubbish out every day. All of this together takes about 20 minutes. Before bedtime we'll put empty tea mugs/wine glasses in sink, straighten sofa cushions and throw dog tools into their basket. Vacuum quickly every other day. On extra busy/tired nights we use paper plates.

When I'm filling/emptying washing machine/tumble dryer I read Mumsnet on my phone. I watch TV on demand when I'm cooking or doing dishes. Even on the busiest days I try to relax a bit with DH before bed, even if it's a glass of wine/cuppa/chocolate in front of 30 minutes TV.

Hope some of this helps ! flowers

HollaAtMeBaby Mon 20-May-13 23:04:13

You posted before and had loads of good advice! If you still can't keep on top of the house, you probably have too much stuff. Look at the decluttering threads on here and start minimalising!

AllRightSoFar Tue 21-May-13 00:08:48

I just think it's all pap, I have moments when it all comes together and stuff gets done but on average the house, car, finances, time keeping, meals ......yup thinking about it most things that distinguish me as the adult are in a pretty shitty state.
I blame pmt, dyslexia, tiredness, unrealistic ideas, lazy arsed husband and the unwillingness for me to take control and run the world oh, and boredom ....god housework is boring!
Does any that apply to you?
It all bugs me hugely but I've been trying to sort all of the above for 10 years - I think I just need to accept this is who I am or win pots loads of money and then it wouldn't matter -it would be other people's job to sort it. Come, share the fantasy.

Booyhoo Tue 21-May-13 00:18:52

right pet.

list your successes. what have you done so far. even if it's tiny. list it here and start feeling good about yourself. because this beating yourself up crap is what is holding you back. believe me- i've been there. you have to let go of the guilt you have over not coping. that's the secret. let go of the guilt. it is a weight around your arms and legs that keeps you from getting up and getting on. set that weight down and just get up and wash 5 dishes. you can keep going after that if you feel like it. but then go to bed and take some lovely long deep breathes and go to sleep. then get up tomorrow and start a new day. i'm not going to give you any more advice now because you need to go to bed and sleep. all the shit will be there tomorrow (and so will we) to be dealt with and you need energy to cope with it. so away you go.

Booyhoo Wed 22-May-13 14:36:56

hey jess. how you getting on? smile

SlatternismyMiddlename Wed 22-May-13 16:16:34

Lovely post Booyoo smile

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