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where do i start

(104 Posts)
jesstheworstmum Mon 07-Jan-13 09:22:51

i just need to get this all out. i need to know where to start.
im a single mum and im in a mess. especially in my house
so much so that when i had to have a paramedic in my house recently they reported me to social services cos my house is a tip sad((
social services just wrote me a letter telling me to get family to help but i dont have any family local
i had a poor upbringing and i just feel like i dont know how to run a house
this morning my son was late for school cos i hadnt dried his clothes in time and i had no dishes clean etc
i know im awful
but where do i start
can anyone help ?

SlatternismyMiddlename Sun 24-Mar-13 23:01:46

Good luck this week Jess. I think everyone goes through fits and starts of being more organised -I know I certainly do.

twinklesparkles Sun 24-Mar-13 13:18:33

Hey jess smile how's it going? Hope you don't mind me joining on your thread

Well done on ss, you clearly aren't a bad mum if they are saying your son is fine smile shows you are a good mum

I hate the spare rooms full of junk, I used to have 2 ... I think I just filled them with crap over the years and never emptied them or even went in them until the day I moved out

One of my secrets for urgent declutterings or tidying is the song technique smile the song technique is awesome, this is what you do .. Get yourself a black bag and choose a song, put the song on and for the duration of the song go MENTAL!! Just run around the room grabbing every bit of rubbish or random junk you can find, at the end of the song, go make a cuppa tea and then chuck the bag out smile

Noticed you said you have only 1 wheely bin to last a fortnight, do you have a place outside you can keep the rubbish until the rubbish men show up? This used to be my biggest problem too. Had nowhere to put the rubbish and I didn't drive or have any family/friends that could take me to the rubbish tip. Can you arrange one day where you could load everything up into your car go to the dump and then maybe go for lunch after? Or for a day out? Thatll give you something to look forward to and a way to get rid of rubbish also.

Another thing could be 30 a day challenge, basically same as the song challenge. Just pick up 30 bits of rubbish everyday and chuck out. Even if its just tiny pieces of paper. Every bit counts, so its easy and quick to get to 30 things smile

Hope you are doing ok today, chin up smile smile smile


jesstheworstmum Sun 24-Mar-13 09:42:05

Thanks jam ;) I guess the lounge
The lounge is better since the social services debacle but there's a corner of doom !
One of my bedrooms I don't even go in its just black bags of crap etc as well

goodjambadjar Sun 24-Mar-13 06:55:32

Hi guys, you can just call me Jam if it's easier. grin

I just wanted to say that I am by no means a naturally tidy person. Our house gets messy and I have to work to keep it tidy. It is not a show home by any stretch of the imagination. but it is clean and homely and that's how I like it.

My philosophy is that it's OK if a few toys are on the floor as long as the floor has been hoovered (which I do once a week)

I used to live in a flat and i only did the washing up when i needed to and i used to hoard all sorts of crap. One day I'd just had enough. I started slowly. Doing the washing up and cleaning the kitchen every day made a huge difference. it made me want to get the other rooms looking as nice. So i got a bin bag for rubbish and a box for the charity shop and i cleared out the spare room. it probably took a couple of weeks because there were days i would look at it and my heart would sink with the amount i had to do. But it got done, sometimes just in 5 minute bursts, sometimes in 30 minutes. But i ended up with an empty spare room which i then painted with some cheap magnolia paint to brighten it up. It made a difference to my thinking, just doing that one small room. So it can be done.

Jess, that's why I've asked you which room you want to do the most. We might be able to help you and even doing one room, or half a room, or a quarter of a room, could give you the motivation to carry on when you see the difference you could make. Failing that, I might have to drive to you with my Black Bin Bag of Doom! wink

Chin up Jess, you can do it. X

cakesaregood Sat 23-Mar-13 20:44:13

Agree with good jam, not that I would know how...

I was always told I was untidy, guess what I became! No one ever thought to tell me how to be tidy. MN has really filled that gap!

goodjambadjar Sat 23-Mar-13 16:47:46

Hi Jess.

Don't lose heart, you'll get there. Are there any of DSs toys he doesn't play with anymore? maybe you can go through them when he's at school or in bed so you can throw or charity shop them. Same goes for his clothes (and yours!)

What room would you most like to get sorted?

jesstheworstmum Sat 23-Mar-13 14:23:37

Just have a few days when I try an try then it all gets bad again sad I don't know if its cos I've got too much stuff or what but its just too damn hard to keep on top of

cakesaregood Fri 22-Mar-13 14:59:42

How are things, Jess? Are you feeling any better?

First day of the hols here. Uniforms washed, just need to dry them...

jesstheworstmum Wed 20-Mar-13 20:55:29

Thanks so much good jam smile)

goodjambadjar Wed 20-Mar-13 14:20:21

Fair enough Jess, at least you're doing something! Hope you feel better soon. thanks

jesstheworstmum Wed 20-Mar-13 13:58:04

No progress on the tip run in all honesty
Of cold and sinusitis this week so just trying to keep up with rubbish dishes and washing really

goodjambadjar Wed 20-Mar-13 07:19:40

Well done Raspberry! it always looks awful when you first start, doesn't it! but so much better when its done.
Well done Jess for getting stuck in when you got home. Are you any closer to doing a tip run?

RaspberryRuffle Tue 19-Mar-13 23:34:06

Jess, good luck and keep it up. I decided to tackle my house this week, I took so much out to clear it looked like a hurricane had hit! But I will get there and so will you!

SlatternismyMiddlename Tue 19-Mar-13 19:34:37

Mmmmmmm, dairylea on toast, that plus pickled onion monster munch got me through my finals.

You are sounding more positive Jess. Every bit, no matter how small, helps.

jesstheworstmum Tue 19-Mar-13 12:54:33

Thanks so much for checking in with me guys
Wasn't home much yesterday so didn't get much done but just got home put a load of washing on and put most the dry dishes awaysmile
Will attack something else after my dairy lea on toast smile

goodjambadjar Tue 19-Mar-13 08:58:10

Hi Jess, how are you today? x

SlatternismyMiddlename Mon 18-Mar-13 09:11:10

Good morning Jess, hope you are feeling good today.

I have posted my list on the spring thread which has continued on from the Autumn slattern thread. I hope to do some damage to the mess today. My DC's are at school and child care so I am on my own.

I intend to embrace the 15 minute blitz then take a break approach.

FreakoidOrganisoid Sun 17-Mar-13 13:28:19

It's a start. That's the main thing. Once you cross something off it motivates you to get the next thing done smile

jesstheworstmum Sun 17-Mar-13 13:26:00

Well done you freakoid smile good job!
I've washed some of the dishes lol and started to hang the first wash ! Laaaaaaaame !

FreakoidOrganisoid Sun 17-Mar-13 13:23:52

How are you getting on?
1st load is drying
2nd load washing
School work is done
We've had lunch and I have tidied after
I have hoovered downstairs
Kids are tidying their room

Its lovely and sunny here today so feel guilty for using the dryer instead of hanging it out but I need it done with zero effort today

jesstheworstmum Sun 17-Mar-13 12:25:19

I need to get a couple if loads of washing done minimum
Do the mountain of dishes
Tidy around
And I guess I could get away with just that :/

FreakoidOrganisoid Sun 17-Mar-13 10:37:34

(Ive just had a shower and am lying down again a bit dizzy so actually need to start by putting some clothes on.)

FreakoidOrganisoid Sun 17-Mar-13 10:32:22

Jess I have a horrible cold today too and am having to lie down in between bursts of energy.

I need to
Put wash on
Wash up from breakfast
Help dd with craft project for school tomorrow
Listen to ds read
Dry load of washing
Put another load on
Dry second load
Put both loads away
Cook dinner
Wash up and tidy round before bed.

What do you need to do?

goodjambadjar Sun 17-Mar-13 10:11:00

Hi Jess, sorry you're feeling poorly. I hope you feel better soon.
Why don't you give yourself a bit if a break today and instead of going at it all guns blazing, do your daily important jobs, like the washing up, bleaching the loo and making sure DSs uniform is ready for the morning and whatever else he needs for school this week.
Then give yourself 15 minutes in either the worst or best room. Whether that's going round it with a black sack and binning loads or having a general pick up and put away session. At least you'll have done something. If its the worst room, you'll have made a dent, if its the least messy room it'll look loads better after 15 minutes. And try the working round the room clockwise thing, I find it really works for me.

Good luck!

jesstheworstmum Sun 17-Mar-13 03:29:23

Thanks everyone
I've got a horrible
Cold but I have to really make myself get up in a few hours and sort this place out. Sunday is really
My only
Day to do stuff so i need to get some shit done !

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