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Loosing the will to live

(9 Posts)
Threeschools Sun 26-Jun-16 10:40:28

Hi, DD8 is really slow at doing her homework and doesn't seem to know the topics, particularly in maths. I thought maybe she was dyslexic or something so got her assessed. The EP report says slow visual processing speed, bad enough to qualify for 25% extra time in exams but no other learning difficulty. I am seriously thinking of stopping doing the homework all together as it is ridiculously painful and I end up dictating the answers. What is the way out of this? She seems to have given up a together. If I don't help her it is not done. When my husband helps her he has the patience of a saint and he makes her doing it and thinking about all the answers herself and she ends up in a pile of despair and misery. And it takes 90 min. I think this is inappropriate. This has been going on all year. At Christmas and 3 times since I spoke to the teacher but she dismissed my concerns and does not listen. Her reply from the slow processing speed data was that she has kids that are much slower than DD. WTF?? I feel like going to the headmistress. It is a private school BTW if this makes any difference. Really fed up.

TheFirie Sun 26-Jun-16 17:33:31

Is it any type of homework or more specifically maths/english or something.

Are you able to identify why it takes so long? Does she get distracted? Is it too difficult for her?

Have you tried to change the timing and habits preceding the homework time? For us, it is homework as soon as we get home. A quick snack at the dining table if the DSs are hungry and after eating, they stay seated and start their homework.

When we have a lot, I use the Pomodoro Technique en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pomodoro_Technique and we do chunks of 25 mins followed by a 10 min break then back to homework. No screen at all during the week and at weekends no screens before homework are finished because it makes things a lot harder.

Threeschools Sun 26-Jun-16 20:46:53

Maths is definitely more difficult and it is way too hard. I work full time so we come back home at 6pm, so by the time dinner etc is over it is 7pm when we get down to homework, not ideal at all. So she basically needs to get on with it in after school care like her big sister but she hasn't got the discipline to do that when most other kids are playing. Today my husband helped her out and took his time, she really needs to be guided through the questions, worded problems are not getting through, she won't see the sums to do, let alone if it has multiple intermediate steps, her concentration is just not there.

TheFirie Mon 27-Jun-16 04:45:30

Worded problems take time to be understood. You need to do dozens and dozens to get the logic, at least for some kids. Can't she get some extra help at school on this topic?

And what about early morning? Put the alarm clock 30 min earlier and see if with a fresher mind she works better.

irvineoneohone Mon 27-Jun-16 15:56:19

My ds used to struggle with word problems. Somebody on MN gave me this link.

www.mathplayground.com/wordproblems.html

Getting used to them really help. Use RUCSAC.
R: read
U:underline/understand
C:choose operation
S:solve
A:answer
C:check

Threeschools Tue 28-Jun-16 09:58:33

C:chose operation is key here. She is not ready yet. We started extra maths tuition on Saturday mornings, just to build her confidence. I will also put my foot down at the beginning of next year (there are only 7 days left in this term and as I already mentioned her teacher is really stubborn) and if she still given this ridiculous Schofield and Sims homework I will refuse to do it and propose a Bond one instead that will at least cover what she sees in class. The Bond no nonsense one seems good.

JustRichmal Tue 28-Jun-16 11:18:40

I do agree with The Firie, getting up earlier could be the answer. Body clocks change as children grow and often the younger children are more awake in the mornings, whereas teenagers become lethargic in the morning and are most awake in the afternoon.

user1465823522 Tue 28-Jun-16 11:35:08

Don't stop her doing homework - it';s there for a reason.

Badbadbunny Wed 29-Jun-16 11:19:47

Won't she get a different teacher in September? It never ceases to amaze me how different teachers can get different results, especially in Maths. You may find that someone different can really improve your DD's skills and turn it around.

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