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DD9 asking to be Home educated again.

(3 Posts)
homeeddilemma Mon 16-Jan-17 22:49:00

I have name changed for this.
DD 9, my youngest dc is constantly asking to be Home Educated again. She started school in Y3 and was pretty much instantly disappointed as it wasn't how she'd imagined it. (I tried explaining it wasn't at all like school was depicted on TV, but she felt she was really missing out, so I let her go).
Fast forward to Y5. She comes up with various ailments and reasons as to why she can't go. It is a struggle getting her to go in some days and the school make a big deal about attendance.
She is anxious and really misses me. She enjoys English, is a super reader, speller and story writer. She really struggles with maths, which is hardly surprising as they have implemented Singapore maths throughout the school with no build up. So dd is doing Y5 work with inadequate background in the methods used. So she hates it and thinks she is rubbish at maths, which she isn't, but she's switching off as it is too hard for her.
I have home educated and flexi schooled my four dcs.
I'm just not sure what to do. She has got lovely friends, enjoys playtime, going to parties and lots of school events.
I worry she will be lonely. I also have commitments looking after my Mum and a family member with dementia.
One part of me really wants to embrace this and go for it. Another part doesn't. When I sounded DH out about it, he said he was actually thinking of suggesting it anyway, as he knows she isn't happy in school.
We have a low income and I have got to the stage where I was thinking about looking for flexible work, but obviously that would no longer be an option.
Any opinions would be really appreciated.

bojorojo Tue 17-Jan-17 01:00:53

Singapore Maths is still the national curriculum - just using different methods!

If she is already behind in maths, how do you propose that she catches up if you home school again? How well will she be prepared for secondary school, or are you continuing beyond primary with home ed if she starts again?

I would ask the school what they are doing to prep her for the maths lessons - ie working out what background teaching she is missing and trying to reinforce the basics ready for each new topic. So if children are doing factors - make sure that times tables are secure.

I would also consider whether she can have what she wants every time something gets a bit tough. If you are not up for it, say so. I get the slight impression that she is tugging at your heart strings. Would she keep her friends if she left school? Unlikely. Think of all the good things about school she would miss and try harder to help with the maths. You could try and learn what Singapore maths is all about - has the school not had an explanation evening? We did (where I am a governor). Nothing that magic about it!

homeeddilemma Tue 17-Jan-17 10:36:29

Thanks for your response bojorojo.

She is probably pulling at my heart strings, although my response to her requests are no, it's not an option and I haven't given her any indication I am even considering it. Yet still she asks.

I am a trained primary school teacher and know if I taught her one to one, she would meet the demands of the harder National Curriculum. She went into school in Y3 at the appropriate level in the old curriculum, but then things got harder. IMHO schools should have rolled out the harder curriculum and implemented Singapore Maths more slowly. We have not had any information meetings about S. Maths. From my own research it looks good and teaching children multiple methods seems sensible, as children learn in different ways. I do help her at home and am seeing her teacher tonight to discuss her maths.

I would ideally only home ed her for Y5 and 6. We live in a Grammar School area and I am tutoring her for the entrance exam. She is doing well and I am reasonably confident at this stage that she will pass.

I take your point about not getting what she wants when things get tough, but this has been going on for a long time now and she is unhappy.

Older DC's all did well with a mixture of school and home education. One went to Cambridge and one is at Medical School. DD14 was home edded in Y6-Y8 and slotted back into Y9 and is achieving top grades and enjoying school, although she finds it stressful.

I'm not going to rush to a decision.

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