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Son being bullied- thinking of HE

(4 Posts)
fraggle500 Mon 03-Oct-16 20:42:11

Hi
My now 15 year son, who has a physical disability has been persistently bullied since year 7. After many, many, phone calls, e mails, meetings and complaints I moved schools. At first all was good, and the school where and are brilliant. However, the bullying still goes on. Some low level name calling, some physical.
My son is now back again to feeling very low. It's so hard to build him back up and I just don't think I can put him through another few years of abuse.
Any way my question is- where do I start with HE when I work full time?
I've done a bit a digging and read up on these boards.
He's not overly academic, but does enjoy the social side of school ( but is sad as he's no friends)
He does volunteer at 3 different clubs, so does get social interaction and confidence from these activities.
Tia x

Cupcakesandscones Tue 04-Oct-16 12:48:16

Fraggle, I was most disturbed to read your message. Your poor son! And poor you! What your son is experiencing is not "bullying" it is hate crime and the school are failing to protect/safeguard him. From what you have written, it appears that your beloved son has a physical disability and because of that he is being targeted for both verbal abuse and physical abuse by other children. If I were in your shoes and the school had failed to stamp out the victimisation of my son, I would threatening the school with reporting the incidents "crimes" to the police. In fact, I would go straight to the police. Please google "hate crime."

My only experience re: home ed is that with a five yr old - flexi-schooling.

mary21 Tue 04-Oct-16 16:04:28

Have you looked at online schools such as inter high

Saracen Fri 07-Oct-16 07:38:18

Hi Fraggle,

Your poor son! As the school hasn't been effective at putting a stop to this, maybe it is time to give up on this school and move on. Does he want to leave school?

Is he Year 11? Academically, it's an awkward time to start home ed, as he'd have to shift over from GCSEs to IGCSEs and if he wants to do those this year then you'd have to scramble to get it all arranged. However, there's no requirement to do exams at all, and if he does do them he can do any number - kids who aren't aiming for uni will probably find 5-6 are enough - and it doesn't have to be this year.

Another alternative is college, either right away or next year after a year of home educating. Some colleges have dedicated full-time or part-time (vocational day release from school) 14-16 provision. Others will accept a home educated child to study part-time alongside older learners if they seem ready. There will be some courses he can begin at college next year without having done GCSEs, while working concurrently towards a few GCSEs at the college. He may not get bullied in the different environment of college, or the college may be more effective at dealing with it than his school was.

Despite you working full-time, you'll manage the academics he needs. It's a matter of helping him find the right resources for what he wants to do, helping him with his studies if he gets stuck, and providing reassurance and encouragement.

If I were in your shoes I would be a little concerned that your son might feel somewhat lonely and isolated if he can't get out of the house enough. He won't have you there to keep him company during the day. Many people spend all day alone, but if it isn't by choice then it feels different. Think what you can do to tackle this. Can he get out by himself; does he use buses? If so, you and he can think of some things to get him out of the house regularly - swimming, library trips, shopping, paid or voluntary work. Even if that isn't possible, he still might prefer the less-than-ideal situation to his current school life, especially since he has no friends at school. The fact that he has already established out-of-school clubs he can continue is a big bonus and that should keep him ticking over adequately. Maybe he'll want to start some extra hobbies in the evenings or weekends when you can take him.

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