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Help!! Advice on whether to homeschool in year 10

(7 Posts)
feeling133 Thu 19-Nov-15 09:28:36

Hi I was wondering if any of you guys have any advice for me, im at my wits end at the moment!
My daughter suffered a break down of sorts a year ago, self harming extreme anxiety and it's all school related. I've followed school, GP advice and she has been on part time timetable. Since September was told she is in full time now or she has to go to a separate building in the school which is used as a special needs prevision and for children with behavioural problems. She is adamant to not go there as its everything about school that she finds difficult in a confined space!
She has basically suffered from social anxiety which led to panic attacks and vomiting in school as they became so severe (she kept this all a secret from me initially) this has then progressed into a phobia. The phobia involves working in silence in classrooms as she is scared to make a noise which can draw attention to herself. She now is school avoidant. She enjoys a few lessons and these allow her to be a 'teenager' she enjoys talking to classmates in these lessons (media) and I'm afraid if I pull her out she will miss out on this small experience which is positive to her. She wants to pursue this in college and uni (and she is very good at it!) She is a bright button, was predicted all As and Bs when she returned in September and I don't want to hinder her any more by pulling her out but at the same time living like this is not easy for any of us! The lessons she attends are the only sociallising she actually does with people, she never has any interest to go out and claims has no 'real friends' (she used to be such a confident popular girl up until year 8, it's heartbreaking to see).
We have a CAMHs appointment next week and she has been seeing a counsellor for the past 5 weeks which is helping her self esteem and I can see a difference in her at home now which is amazing to see! She only has 2 more seasons left though so nervous about what will happen after!
Has any other parents home schooled especially this age group? (Especially in the Bristol area?) I've looked at inter high but not sure we have the money to stretch that far, I haven't be able to return to work after having my son due to these circumstances!
Thanks for any advice!!!

ommmward Thu 19-Nov-15 10:06:15

Have you joined the Bristol home education facebook group yet? Very active, very supportive. Loads of teens in the area are home educated. Once she's begun to get her confidence back, there will be others to make friends with and study with too maybe.
Why not think in terms of delaying everything for one year? Life is not a race. Take a year out to recover, build her confidence, let her develop her interests? There are so many media companies in Bristol - maybe try to arrange some work experience? Volunteer in an old folks home? Go along as a helper to home ed groups for younger children? Once she's got her confidence back, she'll sail through the academic stuff x x

feeling133 Thu 19-Nov-15 11:33:59

No I haven't, I've had a search online but i can't seem to find any groups for her age, they're all for little ones! Thanks i will have a search on Facebook, good old Facebook ay!
Yeah I have asked her to email some film/tv company's to arrange some work experience but she seems to of shut down to anything at the moment.
Thanks for replying, my mind is thinking remove remove remove but all professionals say keep at it keep at it so I'm torn. Guess sometimes it really is a case of mum knows best! X

Saracen Thu 19-Nov-15 23:56:25

You might be interested in Mike Fortune-Wood's book "Can't Go Won't Go: An Alternative Approach to School Refusal".

The author observed that many education and healthcare professionals recommend against home education for young people like yours on the grounds that if they leave school, they will become even more isolated and unhappy than they already are. He surveyed the scientific literature on the subject and could find no reputable studies at all to support this view. His conclusion was that it appears to be an old wives' tale. If you probe the professionals involved with your daughter about the basis for their recommendations, I think you will find it comes down to "everyone knows" or "common sense tells me". It's obvious to me that the earth is flat.

While Fortune-Wood found no sound evidence that HE is harmful to young people who suffer anxiety and phobias surrounding school attendance, he also found no scientific evidence that it's helpful. In the absence of such evidence, he turned to anecdotal evidence, interviewing several dozen families who had removed their children from school.

In some cases, children's problems had disappeared entirely when school was out of the picture. In other cases, problems didn't disappear, but did become more manageable. Some of the children later returned to school after a break. However, all of the families reported that their child's time out of school had been helpful. None regretted their period of home education.

ILoveMyCaravan Wed 02-Dec-15 19:44:42

Hi, I have been home educating my two DSs for the last five years. My eldest is now 14, nearly 15 (so year 10) and has just started attending a 'studio school'. It specialises in media/photography, which are his passions and something which he wants to do for a career. He is absolutely loving it. It is NOT like school! They concentrate on the subjects he is interested in.

I have just done a very quick Google and see that there is a similar one in Bristol:

I know nothing about this particular school, but it does look like a similar set up to the one which my DS goes to. Perhaps this is something that your DD would like as you say she enjoys the media classes at school?

Please feel free to pm me if you would like any further info.

feeling133 Wed 02-Dec-15 23:00:33

Wow! Thank you so much! Xxx

MariscallRoad Thu 03-Dec-15 22:11:05

I dont see any problem. I home educated my son all his primary and secondary years. He made many friends and still keeps them. When he became 16 he attended some classes on line and he did his independent study He is now in his 4th year (Masters) at Uni. Omm and Saracen have very good advice. Join a local group. Take time. I have not read the Fortune-Wood book and would like to do so. smile

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