Oxford anyone?

[littleraysofsunshine]

I gave 4.5yo, 3yo and 17mo!

[Saracen]

Yes, there are loads of HE kids sloshing about here, including plenty of little ones.

Join groups.yahoo.com/neo/groups/OxonHE/info or the Facebook group "Oxfordshire home educators". You can join the Yahoo one just by writing an introduction, and it's open to everyone with a direct personal interest in home ed such as current or prospective home ed parents - not journalists or other professionals. To join the FB group you have to have met someone already in the group, which can easily be arranged.

Some of us are going to Hinksey Pool tomorrow (Tues) from about 10:45 for a few hours; do you want to join us? There will be small people there. I'll send a PM with the info you'll need if you want to do that.

[littleraysofsunshine]

Not sure what to do as my 4yo is eager to Learn all the time and worried I won't be able to match this. She also likes to go to preschool. So I sit selfish of me for wanting to home school or at least part HE.

[Saracen]

Nobody can match the enthusiasm of a four year old on a mission to learn, LOL! Not you, not me, not a school.

This is why I think it's important to give them direct access to the world and help them find out what they want to know. In many ways an adult with an agenda can be a hindrance to the child's learning.

If your daughter likes preschool then she might like school, at least for the first year when school resembles preschool more. Or she might not. Do you feel it's appropriate to let her choose? Some parents do. Other parents believe that a very young child doesn't have the perspective to make such a decision, and parents should go with whatever seems best to them. However, I've hardly ever met a home educating parent who didn't let their older child make the choice for herself about whether to go to school.

My older daughter had the choice. Because she was already well stuck in to HE friends and activities, she didn't want to give that up, so she started off with home ed. For your dd it might be the other way round, since she already knows she likes being at preschool (and that school is sort of like preschool) but doesn't know what home ed might involve. When my dd was nine she tried school, with my encouragement, and came out again after a term. It was a very useful experience for her, but I don't think it is an experience which all children need.

My younger dd was different. I never even suggested to her that school was a thing she could do, nor did anyone else, and it never occurred to her. I am firmly convinced it would be harmful for her, then and now. Because she was brought up surrounded by many home educated kids and only a few who went to school, HE was her "normal". She was eight years old before the concept of being at school herself even crossed her mind. It didn't appeal to her.

Of course it isn't wrong of you to want to home educate or flexischool. (IMO it would be wrong of you to persist with it if you try it and your daughter hates it.) Contrary to popular belief, I think parents usually have an instinct about what's right for their child. I suspect that home education appeals to you not just because you think it could be fun for you, but because on some level you feel it could be what your daughter needs.

[littleraysofsunshine]

She loves one to one time, but also very outgoing and independent. I have a just three and 17mo too so one to one time can be short.

The thing is with us is that everyone around us is very .. "Mainstream?" So it's the 'school' talk a lot. And 'HE, what's that?' Or ' you can't do that you'll be holding her back. You won't have a life etc.

I feel so alone in my thoughts and even their daddy isn't so keen.

Trying to follow my heart and head but can't make it work. :(

[Saracen]

Come and spend some time with us! Really, it makes a huge difference to be with people whose views are similar to yours and who are supportive of what you want to do.

Come to the park or the sports sessions or the parents' evening at the pub, and you'll hear (and see) parents enjoying being with their kids, parents struggling to get by, parents wanting to give their children a happy childhood. You'll see and hear kids who are free to be themselves, kids who disappear up trees, kids who want to be at their parents' side for a number of sessions before they'll talk to anyone, kids who learn to read at the age of seven because that's when they're able and ready and who haven't been given the message that that means they are stupid. It will give you faith.

Monday adventure playground 12:30-2:30, enjoyed by kids of all ages. You may only be able to snatch a brief conversation here and there, as the equipment is big and your 3yo may be wanting help often.

Alternate Monday evenings, parents' pub night. If you are happy to leave your children with their dad you can have a good long talk with other parents. Topics range from home education to novels to science to launching teenagers into the world. I like it because it brings me together with people I wouldn't otherwise see due to our children being different ages or having different interests. There are usually only a few people there, so post to the list if you are thinking of going in order to make sure somebody is definitely going to be there and they can look out for you.

Wednesday drop-in sports session, 10:30 for ages 3-7ish. Bring a picnic blanket and sit and chat. It lasts 45 minutes but some people stay after and play until nearly 1pm so you could bring a picnic.

Thursday park play from about 1-3:30pm. There are little people there. Usually just a few families, so it is easy to get to know everybody.

Friday afternoon at the pub with children's play area from 12:30-2:30ish. Mostly older kids, but they find a way to include the little ones in their games if they want to join in.

Ah go on go on go on go on.