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Light bulb moment, need to be brave, where to start...

(56 Posts)
JuicyShops Thu 08-Aug-13 14:39:58

My DS has been unhappy in a school environment for 3 years and to cut a long story short is under the Mental Health team for a few reasons.

He Detests school. Lighbulb moment came when I realised how happy and unanxious he is now it is the school holidays, then today we had a long and sensible discussion about school. This ended in him desperate to go to secondary school (he has one more year at primary school). I have been so much happier and so has he.

It is an OK school, but I just think he would hate any school!! Any!! He is very bright, but hates work and being under pressure> He has been bullied and his teachers have tried to accommodate his needs but are failing.

My instinct tells me to take him out of school for the final year. I know we can do this. Where do I start and how do I explain it to everyone? Is it worth trying the final year? Loads more questions, I will read the forum later, and sorry for the rambling nature, just snatching a moment!

Also, I have 3 other children, who will all stay in school> Does anyone else have a similar situation?

morethanpotatoprints Thu 15-Aug-13 11:47:26

sorry to derail Toffee where have you been, I've missed you? Have you just been lurking? Hope you, dh and ds are doing well.

ToffeeWhirl Thu 15-Aug-13 12:42:24

Sorry, morethan, I vanished off the home ed boards for a bit because DS1 wanted to try school and so my focus was on that, rather than home ed, for a while. Not sure what's going to happen next, to be honest. Sounds as if your DD is doing well and enjoying her music still grin.

<apologies to op for hijack blush>

JuicyShops Sat 17-Aug-13 18:21:19

Sorry just logged on and seen the discussion. Reading this has actually got things clear in my mind!

Life is too short for your child not to be happy, We have agreed he will try the first term of school and see how things are going. If the anxiety and other problems begin to get worse I will take him out of school.

As for the methods of educating him, I was thinking the natural way would be 1 hour a day of focused learning which will be absolutely more effective than even a whole day of school.

I know him inside out and how he learns and his passions. I want to nurture his passions and who he is. He has already developed all the necessary social skills and does a lot of sport and we have a wide circle of friends and a good social life.

Anyway who says what kids have to learn, when you think about it who sets this rigid curriculum. Who is tell tell us what life our children will carve out? I hated Maths, still got an A at GCSE but hated it and never use anything more than the basic skills.

My son has high ambitions and knows what he wants to do, he can focus and develop that in a way he can't at school.

ommmward Sat 17-Aug-13 18:26:30

Well done you! I would just say: if he is hating it in the first couple of weeks, quietly revise "take him out at Christmas" to "take him out at half term". I don't think there's much point sticking with something you hate and you know you are going to escape soon, just for the sake of sticking with it (working out a month's notice at a job or something is a quite different kettle of fish).

morethanpotatoprints Sat 17-Aug-13 19:39:13

Well done OP, and Good luck to your ds at school.
If for some reason his anxiety returns and is unbearable remember you can deregister from immediate effect and not even have to go back the next day, no notice is required. I think this is useful for those with problems relating to being in school.

JuicyShops Sun 18-Aug-13 07:41:11

Thanks for the tips, it is so much easier now I know we have an option and I would have no hesitation in taking him out immediately!

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