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What to do with self when HE ends ?

(5 Posts)
fastweb Tue 19-Jul-11 08:16:34

My son (almost 11) has decided he wants to go to middle school with his friends in September.

Obviously he waited till I planned the whole of next year and ordered all the books before making up his mind - please note the gritted teeth behind the smile.

How do you transition yourself, the parent, to such a huge "lifestyle" change ?

I have no idea how I am going to fill my days.

I could go back to working full time, but then what if he changes his mind and wants to come out again after the first year ? It would take me at least one academic year to build up my business to a full time level again and if I chuck it all in at the end of that build up, that is a load of clients who will be unhappy and communicate their unhappiness to other potential future clients.

Am I going to end up being a pushy school mamma because I over achieve on the "involved parent" stakes in order to fill a void ? (eyes self suspitiously for helicopter blades sprouting out of spine)

And while I know that his motivation to choose school really was a case of choosing school rather than having a dim view of HE, is it normal to feel a bit...well....rejected ?

Anybody BTDT have some pearls of wisdom for a somebody who considered herself a reluctant HEer out of necessity, but in the space of 2 short years appears to have become more attached to the option than perhaps she realized ?

Is it just a case of keeping busy and letting a new lifestyle evolve naturally ?

I hope not, cos given the limited options in my neck of the woods keeping busy will probably mean doing lots of housework.


LastSummer Tue 19-Jul-11 09:36:47

I'm home educating my lovely daughter until she goes to boarding school, probably next year at 13+. I'll greatly regret the loss of intimacy this will bring but, yes, we must do what's best for our kids.

fastweb Tue 19-Jul-11 09:41:14

I'll greatly regret the loss of intimacy this will bring

I don't think I had even allowed that to form in my head yet.

Oh bugger...gone all leaky again.

I honestly did not expect to feel like this.

FionaJNicholson Tue 19-Jul-11 10:52:58

have you thought about volunteering for something where you can use the 1 to 1 skills from home education eg homestart? (specifically volunteering rather than self-employment because of being able to pick it up and put it down)

fastweb Tue 19-Jul-11 11:34:04

I think volunteering is a really good idea. I think I'm going to have to carve out something by myself though. All the organized volunteer stuff out here in rural Italy is through the church and while I'm not an "allergic" atheist, I think I'd find the conflict on several points wearing after a while.

Mind you I really like the young Don at the youth club, maybe I should ask him if he needs an extra pair of hands. Since my son spends half his life in that place probably is the least I could do given that I'm going to have loads of free time.

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