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Higher education

Can't study/do coursework with 4 year old at home

22 replies

dottiesox · 23/03/2020 07:41

Any practical tips on how I can get work done now that schools and nurseries have closed?

Had DD at home for 1 week and it's been hell trying to watch her with cbeebies on and revise and do coursework at the same time. I'm not getting much information in with so many distractions.

I have 3/4 weeks left of this and 4 pieces of coursework to compete for university. I'm really determined not to fail as I've got this far now.

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aibutohavethisusername · 23/03/2020 08:13

Can you do the coursework when she is in bed?

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dottiesox · 23/03/2020 08:31

Good idea. I've tried before but exhausted and just want to sleep.

Guess I'll have to push myself at bed time. It would probably be worth it to run myself ragged for a few months

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toomuchfaster · 23/03/2020 08:37

Have you asked about changes to deadlines?

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Medievalist · 23/03/2020 08:39

Surely deadline extensions will be available given the extraordinary circumstances we're all in?

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Northernsoullover · 23/03/2020 08:39

Put in for mit circs. It would be really unlikely for them to be turned down.

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CandyLeBonBon · 23/03/2020 08:41

I'm in the same boat op although mine are older so less in need of supervision but it's still distracting and much harder to concentrate. But we will get extensions for mit circa and as we now have no access to resources I'm not sure how we are actually supposed to complete our final two modules.

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Hugsgalore · 23/03/2020 08:45

Hi @dottiesox currently in the same boat.
I've been able to do nothing the last week and am so exhausted by 8PM I cant do anything then either.
My plan today is to try do short bursts or study to try make up my 3/4 hours a day. So set a timer for her for 30 mins and tell her I cannot be disturbed until it goes off. So no asking for snacks or no random questions. I'm hoping she will look at her books or play in her room. Then when 30 mins is up give her lots of positive attention and try again after 45mins or so.

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LolaSmiles · 23/03/2020 08:46

You could apply for an extension under mitigating circumstances, or a few later evenings.
Can her dad take the load off a little?

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chilling19 · 23/03/2020 08:48

I found that going to bed early and getting up at 4am gave me at least 3 hours clear.

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ErrolTheDragon · 23/03/2020 08:55

Presumably your tutors know you have a small DD to care for? I'm sure that academics will be making all sorts of adjustments and allowances this year.

It's a long time since my DD was wee, I think I would have had to actively play with her for periods, and then either work or nap while she watched something or played alone. Do you have any favourite DVDs she can start herself?

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dottiesox · 23/03/2020 08:59

We get a 7 day extension, but I feel having DD at home eats in to my time. If DD were at nursery then the extension would give me sufficient time to complete all work to an acceptable standard.

I do have a partner who isn't helpful. He's asleep in bed whilst I'm doing breakfast, cleaning and cooking most days now. I'm doing it all whilst trying to study at the same time. He has urged me to keep DD away from his dad who agreed to watch DD for the day and is 60-something but won't step in to take his place.

I've tried to get up super early but it's tough. I'm still half asleep. DD still gets up at night asking for a cuddle to sleep, so my own sleep is disturbed.

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Medievalist · 23/03/2020 09:01

Wow op - can't you put your foot down with your partner and insist he does some activities with your dd?

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anothernotherone · 23/03/2020 09:11

I'm in a similar situation although my youngest is 8 but our schools have been closed a week now and we have to actually teach the material sent out as currently the primary is not relenting on keeping up with the syllabus but isn't online teaching. They send out all the materials but it needs loads of supervision. We have selective secondary/ middle school entry nrxt year so I'd be failing my dc3 if he didn't have the best chance due to my neglect - children whose parebts can't support their learning will seriously suffer for it Sad

I have loads of college work to do but its impossible to get a stretch of dedicated time. I just can't focus in ten minute bursts. I'm also doing one long shift plus sleep-in at work per week.

Nobody else on my course has children under 18 - most are young and childles and two have adult children. The couple with school kids dropped out in the first year. I'm also one of only 3 left not studying in my mother tongue. Everyone else has now got masses of time on their hands to revise and I feel at a huge disadvantage - actually I ferl tjat I'm stuffed, but that's life I guess. I have things in my life they don't, which is both a curse for passing the stupid exams and more generally a blessing!

We're still being told we're sitting the first of our finals exactly as normal in mid May...

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Radarred · 23/03/2020 09:17

I find myself only being able to concentrate when ds is in bed. It's not good.

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dottiesox · 23/03/2020 09:37

No partner won't help. I'm pretty assertive and I can't even get through to him. He's a child really. If I get this degree, it could open doors for me so I can leave the wanker.

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dottiesox · 23/03/2020 09:38

If you have primary aged children then I can see how it would be even more difficult to complete work if you have to teach your own children. It's a shit situation.

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dottiesox · 23/03/2020 09:41

Do you have any favourite DVDs she can start herself?

I've tried. She like to provide commentary. She still hasn't mastered playing/being on her own for long periods

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dreamingbohemian · 23/03/2020 09:46

I would definitely encourage you to ask for a longer extension -- I'm an academic and we are being extremely flexible with deadlines right now. Explain that you have a young child with no support (this is not.a lie, your partner is useless).

It might help to indicate a suggested timetable for all your assignments -- perhaps you can submit one on time, one with a short extension, the other two with longer extensions.

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ErrolTheDragon · 23/03/2020 11:33

Bloody hell, I'd assumed you were a single parent. Well, sounds like effectively you are.

Can't this useless man-child nap on a sofa and let your DD do his commentary to him at least?

Do you think she might (to some extent) respond to an idea such as she draws pictures of interesting bits and then tells you all about it later? That's her 'work' while you're doing yours, sort of thing.

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HugoSpritz · 24/03/2020 09:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dottiesox · 24/03/2020 12:13

If he won't step up to the plate to help out then let her Dad who is willing and able to

You haven't read properly. My partner doesn't want our DD around his dad

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HugoSpritz · 25/03/2020 15:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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