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Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Higher education

Trans parents

35 replies

Bakeo · 31/10/2019 18:29

MNHQ you are failing those of us with trans children. I don't want to go anywhere else, I've been here for a decade. I appreciate both sides of the argument but this is Mumsnet not feministnet.

OP posts:
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PixieDustt · 31/10/2019 18:32

Were you meant to send this to MNHQ?

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MrsMaiselsMuff · 31/10/2019 18:35

Wrong place to post it Bakeo, but you're not wrong in what you say. MN has gained a terrible reputation for transphobia (though I do believe the MN team are doing their best to resolve it).

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Moominfan · 31/10/2019 18:40

Not a parent but a sibling. There's a trans widow thread that's thriving. I'm sure a trans parent thread could do well x

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Wheat2Harvest · 31/10/2019 18:50

So those of us who don't want men in women's changing rooms and toilets are 'transphobic'? I'm not a feminist, by the way - I just wouldn't want my children (if they were still young) encountering penises and the possibility that a man is not trans at all but is taking advantage of current legislation for nefarious purposes.

What is wrong with not wanting men in these places if they 'identify' as women but haven't had the surgery? Many of them don't want to use the changing rooms and toilets put aside for 'trans' - they insist on using the women's facilities.

Are we not allowed to have a view that is at odds with yours?

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HugoSpritz · 31/10/2019 19:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Quetiapina · 31/10/2019 19:33

I don't see that wheat2harvest has said anything transphobic. People are allowed opinions.

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wilma12 · 31/10/2019 19:37

Quetiapina. Yes, people are allowed opinions. And Wheat2Harvest's opinion was transphobic. Are you saying that racists aren't racist, just having a different opinion to non-racists?

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Moominfan · 31/10/2019 19:42

I don't think any of what wheatharvest said was transphobic but I'm guessing this is what the op isn't wanting to discuss

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NewNameGuy · 31/10/2019 19:45

Hugo I think you've made your drinking of the cool aid pretty clear here.

I'm a bit tired of seeing teams stuff everywhere online but it's necessary until the country/ world snaps out of this madness

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AnxiousandExcited · 31/10/2019 20:23

I guess if someone would start a thread about the challenges of being a trans parent, and not just against transphobia, it might work.

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PixieDustt · 31/10/2019 20:50

@Wheat2Harvest I agree and that certainly doesn't make me transphobic. In fact I couldn't put it better myself.
Why should we be silenced all the time because we have an opinion which clearly stands for nothing anymore.

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Gingerkittykat · 31/10/2019 21:00

People on the feminist boards are concerned about the transing of children, the health effects of puberty blockers and then making kids sterile with cross sex hormones.

They are also concerned about Mermaids charity.

There is at least one parent of a trans child who posts regularly on the feminist boards who is deeply concerned about their child. My own child identified as non binary for a while but luckily had no intention of hormones or surgery.

Mumsnet is a lot more than parenting, I suppose you want to shut down the litter tray board because it's not catsnet, or is it just people who you don't agree with that you want to silence?

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ArtieFufkinPolymerRecords · 31/10/2019 23:18

Is there a reason this was put on the Higher Education board, because you haven't asked about anything to do with it?

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ErrolTheDragon · 01/11/2019 00:24

HE board seems a bit random...

Maybe the LGBT children board might be what you want (I don't know, it's not somewhere I have cause to go)


www.mumsnet.com/Talk/lgbt_children

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ErrolTheDragon · 01/11/2019 00:28

There is at least one parent of a trans child who posts regularly on the feminist boards who is deeply concerned about their child.

There are quite a few. It seems like for them it's not so much that they don't want to go anywhere else, it's that there's nowhere else they can go. Other platforms don't seem to 'allow both side sides of the argument'.

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MrsTerryPratchett · 01/11/2019 00:31

Is there a reason this was put on the Higher Education board, because you haven't asked about anything to do with it?

Been here a decade, doesn't know how to post? Hmm

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Whatwouldbigfatfannydo · 01/11/2019 00:32

I hope you've no intention of lying that they can change sex, medicating your child, failing to protect them from effectively being sterilised or advocating for the lifelong trauma caused by the 'transition' process advocated by toxic organisations like Stonewall or Mermaids.
Mumsnet would be failing children by removing the discussion about this abuse.

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slipperywhensparticus · 01/11/2019 00:36

I do not wish sex offenders to gain access to vulnerable people by pretending to be trans I do not wish vulnerable women put away from safe spaces because they are better than natel women that's just the start of things

It's not transphobic its perfectly reasonable to not want that and many trans REAL trans who want the surgery who GET the surgery understand

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Ereshkigal · 01/11/2019 00:39

Wheat2Harvest - in answer to your question - yes you are indeed transphobic.

Then the term is utterly meaningless. Well done 👍🏻

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Birdsfoottrefoil · 01/11/2019 01:02

It is transphobic to not want my 12 year old daughter to get changed in a communal changing room alone with a man who may have done nothing to change his appearance as that man may or may not be transgender and it is transphobic to ask.

My daughter is a bigot if she expresses concern at getting undressed in front of this man

My daughter must be taught that if a man wishes to get undressed in a changing room with her, including exposing his penis, then she is not allowed any boundaries and must get undressed in front of him

If anyone suggests that this opens the door to abuse then you are being transphobic. And anyway men will always abuse women and girls.

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OneHanded · 01/11/2019 01:03

This thread is so needed, thank you!

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Birdsfoottrefoil · 01/11/2019 01:06

onehanded can you confirm that you agree with my post?

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Coyoacan · 01/11/2019 04:02

I'm still waiting to see what the OP wants to talk about? Do you have any specific worry or concern, OP. that you cannot post in the LGBT parents forum?

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slipperywhensparticus · 01/11/2019 07:15

Drop and run hoping for a load of transphobic comments unfortunately it's the wrong board

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Needmoresleep · 01/11/2019 09:45

Can't resist
Quote from Barack Obama yesterday.

“Like if I tweet or hashtag about how you didn’t do something right, or used the wrong verb, then I can sit back and feel pretty good about myself because: ‘Man, did you see how woke I was? I called you out,’” he said. “That is not activism.”

For the subject, just look at the debate. OP "mums should stick to being mums" PP "but there are some important issues that affect women" PP "that is hate"

und so weiter. Whatever happened to informed and respectful debate?

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