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Oxbridge Applications 2019 (Part Three)

(1000 Posts)
windowframe Wed 09-Jan-19 13:16:35

Today is a big day for many... time for a new thread too

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windowframe Wed 09-Jan-19 13:18:45

Link to part two

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Coleoptera Wed 09-Jan-19 13:43:09

Hope this is the right thread? Many congratulations to those whose DCs have had good news today and massive commiserations for those who haven't. I still don't know!

DT2 is at school and had warned me he might not open his emails till he's back home tonight and it looks as if so far, that's what he sticking to. The waiting is awful! He did the same thing when waiting to hear about interview offers and only finally opened the email right in the middle of a very busy Parents' Evening - much to our joy - at that point.

I think, like then, he's assuming it'll be bad news and so wants to wait till he's home but he could also - knowing him - check his emails just before he cycles home tonight. So I did remind him to cycle safely no matter what. His twin has a longer day today and so won't be there when DT2 gets back.

I'm sort of preparing for the worst, really and feeling sick on his behalf, as I know he really, really wants this. Hopefully, this will kick start my New Year diet!

I feel so sorry for those of you on here who have been disappointed today. It's gutting when you see your DCs upset and you just can't make it all right for them. It's much worse than when anything challenging happens for yourself.

I'll update when I have any news - good or bad....

Coleoptera Wed 09-Jan-19 13:44:27

Does no letter today probably indicate it'll be a rejection email? I'm working from home and checking not only my phone but also looking out for any post through the door - and nothing so far....

Coleoptera Wed 09-Jan-19 14:02:07

Justanothermile, Lumpy, Spiral, Questioner and anyone else I've missed out, whilst I'm still in a place of unknowing, I just wanted to say look after yourselves today too. We are the foundations from which our DCs spring and to be there for them, we have to look after ourselves too.

I may be joining you a little later today. Every one of us has our own story and our own reasons for wanting our DCs to succeed in whatever way they want to. While I'm still in limbo, I've got the energy to say to those who got a 'no' today - in the end, it'll all be fine and I know so so many people who are extremely happy and successful who didn't go to Oxbridge (in our extended family). That's what I'll remind my DTs about if they don't get through to the next round.

I'd better get back to work and stop thinking about it and just wait until DT2 tells me his news. Congratulations again to those who have had the offers they wanted today.

Coleoptera Wed 09-Jan-19 15:03:13

DT2 didn't get an offer. So so sad for him. Apparently no one got in for History at their school, at all and one of the cleverest of his peers, applying for a different subject, also didn't get an offer. So at least he's in 'good company'.

He said he'd wanted time to process it before telling me and that he's OK about it. I doubt he really is but I'm there for him no matter what.

I wish he was young enough for me to scoop up in my arms and cuddle away the pain - but obviously he's a bit too old for that now.

ErrolTheDragon Wed 09-Jan-19 15:25:29

Sorry to hear that - but yes, he'll be in good company, and I'm sure he'll fly wherever he does go (unless he decides on the reapplication route).

As someone who didn't get a Cambridge offer 40 years ago (crikey... actually must be 41 now) it absolutely did not blight my life.

Justanothermile Wed 09-Jan-19 16:10:05

Thanks coleoptera - I was so hoping your DT would have good news. He seems a little like my DD, a really diligent worker, a 'proper grafter'. It's really hard to see students like this not get a break sometimes. My other dc has all the brains and none of the work ethic....

Your are totally correct in your words below too.

I agree Errol - wherever they land, I'm sure this will feel like home by the end of the first few days.

ShalomJackie Wed 09-Jan-19 16:37:04

Remember it is not a rejection of them but an over-subscription for the course/college/uni.

They may have been small fish there but they will certainly be the big fish where they end up which I am sure will also be a prestigious uni.

Congrats to those who have offers (next step - meet the grades) and commiserations with those that don't.

I will be going through all this in 12 months time.

(Aurea - pm'd you)

Lililili Wed 09-Jan-19 16:52:08

Oh I am sorry all who didn’t get good news. It makes me feel so nervous for Monday! They will do well wherever as everyone says though! Coleoptera I’m very sorry, I know this is now a very difficult position for you and DT1 to be in as well as the disappointment for DT2. All the best.

BasiliskStare Wed 09-Jan-19 17:17:00

I followed this equivalent thread 4 years ago ( almost to the day ) re DS.

Just to say , congratulations with those who have places , and for those who don't, DS's friends who went elsewhere are very very happy and doing well. Once the day is over , things can go perfectly well. A particular friend of his is doing fabulously at another university. As are others. I hope that does not sound trite. & yes too many very good applicants for too few places - but also true of the likes of Durham, LSE , Edinburgh etc etc ( insert very good university of your choice to my list)

All best to all DCs

Runzilla Wed 09-Jan-19 17:47:53

No good news here either. It's been a long day waiting to give him a hug! I think it will take a while to sink in, though at the moment he seems okay. He says that only one of the group of friends he made at interviews got in, so at least doesn't feel left out. Congratulations and commiserations to all. I think that those who are disappointed now will still have learnt a lot from the experience xx

BasiliskStare Wed 09-Jan-19 17:54:25

Make it a big hug Runzilla - He will be fine I am sure. Lovely to get an offer ( an to be clear DS would have been disappointed not to ) but over the last 3 or 4 years with his friends , it is not a disaster not to. So many do so well at other universities. DS and his friends meet up from many universities - all doing well , all happy. All best to your DS

Spagyetti Wed 09-Jan-19 17:54:48

Nerve wracking for you all (not as nerve wracking as those of us waiting for Monday though).

Well done those who got in and commiserations to those who didn't. As PP said, I'm sure it's a good learning experience all round.

zxcv123 Wed 09-Jan-19 17:58:28

Good news here - Maths. So sorry for those who were disappointed today. It really is a bit of a lottery once they get to interview stage.

Rianna Wed 09-Jan-19 18:20:59

Big hug Runzilla - and everyone else.
So far none of the other children we know got accepted- and they’re all extremely bright :-(

Tinseltrauma Wed 09-Jan-19 18:44:04

Congratulations to those with offers, commiserations to those without. No offer here sadly. DS is sanguine about it, though obviously a bit disappointed. Nobody else in his school got an offer either (out of the three who got to interview), nor did anyone he met at interview, so that's made it a bit easier I suppose. He has an offer for Durham which he has accepted today and is already getting excited about the offer holders visit and the college allocation (fingers crossed he gets his choice!). As for me, though there is disappointment obviously, the overwhelming feeling is relief that the process is over. I've found it long and stressful - pleased he's my youngest and I won't have to do it again! Good luck to everyone going forward, they are all clearly very bright kids to have got to this stage - I'm sure they'll do well wherever they end up smile

3nationsfamily Wed 09-Jan-19 19:00:50

Good news and huge relief here as DS got offer for Engineering, but standard offer is brutal at A*A*A with stars in 2 out of Maths/physics /FM, so far from a slam dunk. Now to see if he is sufficiently motivated to get stuck in and make the grades.

bevelino Wed 09-Jan-19 19:13:02

I am still waiting for dd to come home to let me know as she has been away for a couple of days. Hurry up girl.

bevelino Wed 09-Jan-19 19:50:59

Good news here and commiserations to those who were not lucky,; and there is a big luck element to the selection process.

DrMadelineMaxwell Wed 09-Jan-19 20:37:57

Congratulations to the lucky ones and commiserato for the unlucky ones. And with the number of applicants for the much smaller number of places it is lucky to get through all the hoops and hurdles to get an offer.

Dds friend didn't get an interview for Oxford. Dd did for Cambridge so now she waits for Monday. She has a mock on Mon so that should help her keep her mind off it.

She's realistic and is very happy with her 2nd choice and a third if she doesn't get an offer but I'm dreading a disappointed dd.

Coleoptera Wed 09-Jan-19 21:06:45

Further congratulations and commiserations to everyone else who's now had news. DT2 is being very brave but I think is gutted.

What seems to be helping him most is that so so many of his peers at school who had interviews, also haven't been made offers. I think out of the 60 or so who got Oxford interviews (as opposed to others who've applied to Cambridge like DT1), we've only heard of 8 so far who've been made offers. This is much much lower than last year and includes several mega clever candidates - think 13A*s at GCSE, national top level in their subject, a whole school career as highest achievers at a very academic school.

So DT2 feels 'in good company', although with some of the students, I really really can't see how they'd not get an offer. Also, only one of the whole chat group of fellow candidates at DT2's college has got an offer. That's helping too, as it means he won't at all be the only one not meeting up with them again at Oxford.

I feel so so sorry for all those without offers like DT2 of course but seeing the calibre of candidate who didn't get an offer is also helping him through this.

DT1 is now torn between still hoping he might get an offer for Cambridge next week and worrying about his twin's potential reaction, although DT2 is saying all the right encouraging things to DT1 and vice versa actually. They're being very kind to each other. DT1 has also told me he feels relief as he can now feel less 'pressure' to get an offer, given his more conscientious twin hasn't got one. So maybe that's good too.

Neither DT has got an offer from what would have been their second choice - Durham - the only uni from which they've not had an offer. It would help if they did get offers there as their other choices are much lower down in what they desire (Bristol, Warwick, York, for DT2 and Exeter, Warwick, York for DT1).

I guess I need to help them get all enthusiastic about two of these standing offers now, as these may be their final possible pool of choices.

Wow to all those whose DCs got offers today, especially in light of the calibre of candidate I've heard about who didn't make it. Not including DT2 in that as he was never as high achieving as many of his very academic peers - but he was passionate about his subject and had spent the entire summer preparing for his application. I keep telling him 'it's their loss' and hope in the coming days it'll get easier.

Bowchicawowow Wed 09-Jan-19 21:45:43

Perhaps they didn’t interview well?

Bowchicawowow Wed 09-Jan-19 21:46:28

I hope your DT2 is OK though.

Ontopofthesunset Wed 09-Jan-19 22:08:52

I've also been lurking on the thread, and want to send commiserations and congratulations in equal measure. I'm so sorry for those who have been very disappointed - as parents, we, with our experience of various setbacks and disappointments, know they will be fine, whether they choose another university now, or reapply next year, but it is very hard for them now and hard for them to understand how fine it will all be.

Remarkably DS2 has an offer to read one of the modern languages joint schools - I say remarkably as he was very matter of fact about his chances and very surprised that he was successful. In fact his message to me with the screenshot of the UCAS update was HOLY FUCK. His school has loads of applicants and there seems to be a great deal of luck in who squeaks in and who doesn't - there are some very strong candidates who haven't got an offer and some less likely candidates (DS2) who have.

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