Way too invested - vetmed

(8 Posts)
Figmentofmyimagination Thu 29-Nov-18 12:16:46

Is anyone else suffering from parental anxiety in the wait for interviews etc? The build up - work experience, chasing references, special forms and essays etc - has dominated our conversation for so long now, and I’m way too invested in the outcome. Can’t bear to think of DD being disappointed after all this effort. Doing my best to be jolly while secretly stalking student room forums to see whose heard from where and then keeping my knowledge to myself. Honestly I sometimes think social media is a curse. Anyway, just reaching out really! I see there are lots of oxbridge threads here but nothing for us poor vetmed mums.

OP’s posts: |
3catsandadog Thu 29-Nov-18 13:34:33

Hi my DS applied to medicine last year and my DD is applying to Vet med next year.
I am sure you will be more than welcome to join the current Medicine thread as vets seem a little thin on the ground in Mumsnet smile

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Thu 29-Nov-18 14:31:17

😊 Haha, I think you are in good company in the Mumsnet higher education threads. There are lots and lots of 'over-invested' parents on here. I think I know the A level results of some posters kids better than my own kids.
I was definitely over invested with my kids. I think it's ok as long as nobody knows. Most importantly your kids mustn't know. It's their lives and they need to be thinking and doing things for themselves......even if you are quietly helping them. I never let on to my kids how nervous I was for them.

I tended to help them with other things such as letting them do fewer chores, making nice food or providing a taxi service rather than getting involved in the actual application process.

olliepolly Thu 29-Nov-18 17:13:40

This was me in 2016/17 .Was all geared up for it to be a possible 2 year process and with a few challenges along the way dd1 is now a 2nd year vet student. She is settled and working hard on the right course in the right uni for her. Whew.
However am now in the middle of Cambridge application /interviews with dd2 and it is even worse........
Mumsnet has been invaluable as a source of information and to manage my stress while trying to keep calm and let dd make the right choices for her.

Figmentofmyimagination Fri 30-Nov-18 16:56:29

olliepolly it's awful isn't it. I just wish I could wave a magic wand and fix it all.

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RedHelenB Fri 30-Nov-18 20:52:51

Been through it with dentistry a couple of years ago as it was all new to me. I know of someone that got onto the kings 6 year programme for vet science.

teta Mon 03-Dec-18 19:17:59

I was very over-invested too when Dd applied to Vet school and Dd knew it!
But it was such a stressful time for her applying and for me too. The worse thing happened that she didn’t get a A in Chemistry and had to repeat. The application process really badly affected her as her offers came in so late, by which time she was pretty demoralised. However this actually turned into a really good year of doing a real job and retaking. She’s now flying and very happy in Vet school.
Things don’t always go to plan and that’s a good lesson in life. Sometimes you appreciate things more if you have to strive for them.


IwishIcoulddecide Fri 07-Dec-18 08:43:24

I feel your pain and I’ve had a sneaky look on a forum myself. It’s the lack of transparency in the process that’s hard to live with - leading to a fair amount of conjecture. Luckily my DD doesn’t have a favourite amongst the Unis she’s applied to so any offer is great and more than one a bonus.

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