Graduate gifts

(22 Posts)
blueskypink Fri 06-Jul-18 08:19:39

Done every year I know. But can't decide whether to go for something significant for ds (if so what?). Or give him a few hundred quid towards the two holidays he has planned over the summer. Or maybe a bit of both.

DDs must be so much easier - a nice piece of jewellery for example. But what are people doing for their sons graduating this summer?

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titchy Fri 06-Jul-18 09:10:05

Gosh do people do this? <takes mental note>

Given that they'll have had the best part of £20k in maintenance from me, a hearty congratulations and dinner in a nice restaurant was my plan!

blueskypink Fri 06-Jul-18 13:50:22

gringringrin I'm sure you're right Titchy! But graduation is next week and I suddenly remembered threads in previous years about what to buy to mark the occasion.

I'm sure he's not expecting anything and, like you we've spent the best part of £20k on rent etc. I'll bung him a few quid before he sets off to Spain the following day.

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MadeinBelfast Fri 06-Jul-18 14:04:43

Would he appreciate something like this as a momento?

Xenia Sat 07-Jul-18 12:18:47

No way. Nothing at all. I think I paid for the graduation photo and gown hire but that's it. Mind you the fact I am / have funded all 5 without a single bit of any student loan or debt is a massive gift and they are jolly lucky I work full time and can fund it.

goodbyestranger Sun 08-Jul-18 21:58:05

I've never given anything at all, even for a First. I stand everyone in the family who can make it a celebration meal at a decent restaurant the night before and pay for the gowns and lunch tickets and I send flowers to the girls and chocolates to the boys during the third year revision period but it's not occurred to me to buy a graduation gift as such.

Needmoresleep Mon 09-Jul-18 07:23:40

A nice dinner out after the ceremony, plus we paid for the photos and would have paid for the gown etc had we been asked. I did look at a small momento (lots on the University website) but did not like any.

Truth is that going forward will be expensive. If they have a graduate job they may need suitable work-wear, a flat deposit, a car or a season ticket. And if they don't have a graduate job there may be costs associated with interviews, or indeed help with living. Plus interest suddenly becomes payable on student overdrafts.

If you want to give something I would focus on a constructive gift that will help with the next stage of life. A new suit or similar? And if they go travelling, perhaps hold that gift in reserve.

Second graduation this week. This time Masters. Not thought to offer the meal, and suspect he might prefer the local curry house. Last time though, somewhere far smarter, was nice and a real sign-off to his hard work.


Needmoresleep Mon 09-Jul-18 07:41:53

My mother, quite untypically, sent me the money for a holiday. I was working through the summer to pay the rent, before starting a graduate traineeship, and had realised I was exhausted. I was in the process of trying to borrow from a friend, or rather her slightly older, and so more monied, boyfriend, so I could have a week in Majorca, when this cheque turned up. Yes....a good graduation present.

TinklyLittleLaugh Mon 09-Jul-18 09:06:11

Um, we gave DS a grand and a pair of tickets for The Who. The money was for launching himself into the adult world; rental deposit, interview expenses etc. It's how we tend to organise finances in our family rather than dripping money over a longer time.

DD just graduated and we will do the same. However she is in America at the moment so we are waiting until she gets back so that she doesn't spend it all travelling. Don't get me wrong; I don't have a problem with my kids travelling but they can fund that themselves.

goodbyestranger Mon 09-Jul-18 09:20:02

I hadn't really considered those sort of things gifts as such Needmoresleep, more just seeing that the DC have what they need - celebration meal, interview clothes, support to move to London etc etc. I'm feeling less mean smile

Needmoresleep Mon 09-Jul-18 12:41:16

The point was not that these are particularly gifts, but that all sorts of stuff comes up. It seems better to suggest that, say, driving lessons are a graduation gift, than simply hand it out. This branch of the Bank of Mum and Dad is slowly closing its branches and cash points, though an on-line department may still be open for assistance with house deposits.

(Well throw in a bit of Brexit uncertainty, plus the likelihood that both DC will be students for another five years. By then it wil be us going out to celebrate, without them, and them owing us graduation gifts.)

mumeeee Mon 09-Jul-18 18:51:27

We just gave each DD a small gift and card to mark the occasion. That was the same for most of their friends.
They were just happy to Graduate and their degree was enough to celebrate their achievements

BasiliskStare Tue 10-Jul-18 16:47:49

DS had his results yesterday and we went out for a nice meal in the evening to celebrate. We will probably do something nice in the evening after his graduation. It hadn't even crossed my mind to buy him a present as well. I think he is happy enough that even if we did buy him something it wouldn't be more meaningful than just having got through well.
I am rather embarrassed to say - it had not even occurred to me we could be being mean by not buying a present. blush

kaykay72 Wed 11-Jul-18 01:09:58

Mine is getting a card and his flat deposit too - no point in a posh watch (do they even bother with watches much these days?) if he’s on a park bench!!

wentmadinthecountry Thu 12-Jul-18 23:24:33

Dd2's graduation was earlier this week - a nice meal out at a lovely restaurant for all of us. Dd1 got a pen she chose - eventually - vintage 50s Parker unused. Not expensive.

As pp have said, two first degrees and one masters down the line so far, I've spent quite a lot already. No point spending money on unwanted tat. Ds hasn't been to university but we still have dd3 to go in a few years - at some point my money is going to be spent solely on me!

Ocies Fri 13-Jul-18 07:09:45

I bought ds a new suit when he graduated two years ago and we went out for dinner. He had just turned 21 and we had bought him a new camera for that so it didn’t seem necessary to buy more gifts.

meditrina Fri 13-Jul-18 07:12:10

A good interview suit (good for both sexes), or a watch, or other posh accessories (bag, wallet, cufflinks, Mont Blanc pen)

Or university plaque plus contribution to holiday fund?

Serin Sat 14-Jul-18 08:31:06

We commissioned a local artist to do a picture of DD's uni. She loves it and hopefully it may go up in value.

blueskypink Sat 14-Jul-18 09:36:34

Some nice ideas here. But I'm going to give him money for his holiday. He's worked hard and deserves it!

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scaryteacher Fri 20-Jul-18 13:14:47

We bought ds cufflinks last year, and a Leavers hoodie. Not sure what to get him for his MA graduation in December.

BackforGood Fri 20-Jul-18 23:11:35

We paid for his gown hire, and took him out for a nice meal.
Am NOT going down the route of 'significant gifts' either.

blueskypink Sat 21-Jul-18 06:59:54

Graduation done and dusted. I think we fully acquitted ourselves on the gift front as we -

- put some money in his account the day of his last exam with strict instructions that it had to be spent celebrating
- took him and his gf out for a meal the evening before graduation
- took him, his gf and their 6 housemates out for lunch the day of graduation
- paid for his gown hire and grad ball ticket

The only keep-sake type thing I bought was a ridiculously over-priced certificate holder tube - though that was mainly for practical reasons to protect it from prosecco spillage etc!

And finally, we are going to put together a little album of photos for him from graduation day.

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