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DD so upset at uni it's breaking my heart

(156 Posts)
amumthatcares Thu 03-Oct-13 08:33:40

Just to re-cap: For those of you that read my previous posts, DD was torn between a uni for the city and it's vibrant nightlife and the top uni for her course in a quieter city. She firmed the top uni. On getting her results she had a complete melt down and said she'd made a terrible mistake with both the course and the uni. She wanted to be in the vibrant city and do a course that had a wider career path choice. We discussed everything, pointing out all of the possible pitfalls if she changed (ie, strong possibility of not getting campus accommodation, etc.,) She was still sure she wanted to change, saying that she would make friends with house mates and on her course etc., and so we did everything we could to help her swap through clearing.

She got allocated an off campus house (5 sharing). It started off badly when we took her down and nobody else moved in that day and so she spent the first night alone. The next day two lads moved in who she has got on well with. That was 3 weeks ago. This week 2 international students have moved in that obviously have completely different cultures and do not share similar personalities to my DD. She has been unable to meet anyone at the Uni as she has to travel by train for a one hour lecture of 100+ students and then 5 hours later (too long to spend hanging around on campus with nothing to do) go back for another lecture. Everyone just leaves the lectures and goes their own way and so she goes back to her house. She sees all her school friends on FB that are in uni halls, posting pics of Freshers flat parties and clubbing.

She is quite a strong, outgoing girl and very sociable and is in absolute bits that she is finding it so hard to make friends and have that uni Freshers experience. We have looked at the societies that the uni has to offer and there is literally nothing that would remotely interest her. Apart from feeling very lonely and isolated, her big concern now is that students start sorting out next years house shares shortly after Christmas and she is panicking about what she will do. I know she made the decision to swap and go there, I know she has to live with it, I know there is little we can do to help change the situation but it hurts like fucking hell to see your DC so distraught sad

MABS Sun 13-Oct-13 09:51:55

Thanks for asking, she really is fine, very happy and settled there again, pretty sure she telling truth! we off to Oz on wed so she needs to be fine is you see what i mean!!??

ajandjjmum Sun 13-Oct-13 10:36:04


Just returned from my first visit to Oz - loved it! Hope you have a great time.

MABS Sun 13-Oct-13 11:49:32

great AJ, where were you? I have been couple times now smile

ajandjjmum Sun 13-Oct-13 12:37:39

We spent some time in Sydney (DH's sister lives near there), and we went up to Port Douglas for a week and Uluru for a couple of days. Realised just how much more there is to see - might have to start thinking about another visit in a few years!

Where are you off to?

MABS Sun 13-Oct-13 12:53:04

nice smile we have friends in Gold coast so there, Byron Bay and few days Sydney..

ajandjjmum Sun 13-Oct-13 16:59:30

It'll be brilliant - have fun!

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