Advanced search many of you parents out there are able to pay for this?

(68 Posts)
skyblue11 Wed 02-Oct-13 21:09:34

Most of my colleagues say they give their child the maintenance and pay the accommodation, there's no way we have a spare 5,100 or even 4,500! She will be struggling and have a huge overdraft and I'm scared for her.

Monty27 Wed 02-Oct-13 21:55:23

Noooo I couldn't very sadly. (Single parent). Dd wasn't sure whether she wanted to go to Uni and when her friends started applying she decided to do it too. I made it clear that 'I would help her as much as I could'. I did a standing order for her to cover her food. She had savings from her job, her grandma (her df's dm) gave her a 'few bob' and she worked a bar at uni.

Her df has never given her a penny for about 9 years.

So to sum up, you do what you can.


Monty27 Wed 02-Oct-13 21:58:52

DD got a very small grant, because I work on the cusp of her getting anywhere near a full grant. I'm paye and her wealthy friends' parents with their fancy accountants embroidering their finances were getting full grant and all sorts on top angry

But... Dd respects me and is very grateful for my support smile

YouveCatToBeKittenMe Wed 02-Oct-13 21:59:37

we did but only because my dad died last November and I used my inheritance to pay for the accomodation
Quite frankly I don't know how we would have been able to afford to send DS to uni without that money.
I hope DS gets a job soon though as we can't pay for everything, he will still have a mahoooosive loan bill after his 4 years of uni.

skyblue11 Wed 02-Oct-13 22:04:50

She can get a grant of 1800 but I think Ill be working to get her through it...hopefully shell get a job but will need time to study as it's not easy for her, she's currently allowed extra time for exams etc..

Monty27 Wed 02-Oct-13 22:33:41

Do what you can, and good luck. They have a ball as well as working hard. Dd is very happy. smile

Shootingatpigeons Thu 03-Oct-13 00:46:16

Regardless of what we can afford, we expected DD to take out the full maintenance and fee loan, and learn to live off it responsibly knowing she will have to pay off her debts. We do pay her rent, she was in self catered in the first year, because she could not have lived on what would have been left. She is on a degree with a very high workload, she has tried to keep up a couple of jobs but always ended up having to give them up when work started to pile up. This seems to be a common arrangement amongst those parents who can afford it and don't want to give their DCs an easy ride. She did come home from school one day and claim "everyone's" parents were going to pay for everything but when she realised it wasn't going to be for negotiation she gave up without much of a fight which suggests that "everyone" was a bit of an exaggeration.

What are these accountants doing to get DCs maintenance grants that are not justified? DDs friends who get maintenance grants all have single parents, parents in low paid jobs etc. on the whole they also get nurseries and scholarships from the uni as well.

Shootingatpigeons Thu 03-Oct-13 00:48:14


Monty27 Thu 03-Oct-13 00:53:33

I wish I knew Pigeons, I struggle (have a ds too coming up to 18, he's not going to Uni). Money is extremely tight and i work full time, commute, pay a mortgage, no maintenance.....

I have looked into bursaries and all sorts. i don't appear to qualify. I've asked dd to look into the welfare part of uni, I think she was too proud to do so. angry

Accountants embroider books to make the parents look poor. That I know sad

Monty27 Thu 03-Oct-13 00:55:01

Oops @ accountants and rich parents, not all, but some. I do apologise for getting my paint brush out. blush

Shootingatpigeons Thu 03-Oct-13 08:22:21

Monty Your DD has my sympathy. I didn't get a grant back in the distant past. People forget that even then the grant was means tested. My parents did what they could and with jobs in the holidays I managed though I was much worse off than those on full grant. It meant not having money to feed the meter in winter and having to work in the library to keep warm. Saving up pennies for shampoo. Still managed to budget for very cheap disgusting wine and cider and a curry each week wink It was easier because many of my peers were in the same boat and no one was out clubbing, had expensive electronics as default etc. and we could work in the summer, being expected to build up your CV with unpaid internships hadn't been conceived of. I did end up working at whatever I could get to pay off my overdraft before I embarked on a career though. I suppose the main legacy of this is that I am too mean to entertain completely funding my DD.

I think this generation have been shafted by government, especially those whose parents fall in the gap between having money to spare and qualifying for the grant. However from a parents point of view they will cope, as you say, do what you can but they are young adults and they do have to start taking some responsibility for their own lives.

DD does say that, even in London, her flatmates who are on full grant, with bursaries etc manage to save, sharing the same lifestyle as she and her friends who are coping on loans and what parents can do to help. They do seem to think a couple of nights a week clubbing and having a flat Xbox, telly etc are a minimum though..... hmm

skyblue11 Thu 03-Oct-13 17:07:47 you paid all her accommodation and gave her all the maintenance loan as food and other costs?
did this mean she had effectively about £100 per week for food and spends?
The accommodation is a staggering price I can't believe they can get away charging so much!

snowyowl70 Thu 03-Oct-13 18:08:34

Does anyone know if student loan company give a figure that parents are expected to contribute ? My DD1 will get about £4300 maintenance loan and no grants so this will barely cover her halls - we will give her what we can afford and try and work out a realistic budget but with 2 younger siblings still at home we wont be able to afford to pay her halls - am planning on letting her use her loan to cover most of halls then provide monthly amount to live off . Has anyone else taken this approach ?

Shootingatpigeons Thu 03-Oct-13 18:10:06

skyblue Pay, she is still there with a fourth year next year, and planning PhD the year after that. Thankfully she has a fees remission for the Master's and hopefully, well, will have to, get funding for PhD. DD2 starts next year, hopefully. Yes, we pay the rent, and the maintenance loan, bit more than that as she is in London, is for everything else, clothes, food, travel etc. The idea is that she saves a little, we sat down with her to do the budget and it should be possible, but what she has she spends. She is however good about watching the pennies, and spending judiciously on food, heating etc. but only so she has money to go out and for clothes. hmm It does seem a very common arrangement.

Shootingatpigeons Thu 03-Oct-13 18:28:05

Her hall fees, self catered were only about £50 a month more than the going rate for private student flats, which given the security, cleaning, heating and that it was infinitely more salubrious isn't so bad,

snowy I think it would be more normal to give them a termly amount so they learn to budget alongside each other but my parents gave me a monthly allowance.

mumeeee Thu 03-Oct-13 21:57:16

We are paying for DD3's accommodation and she is using her maintenance loan for all other living and uni costs, We did the same for her older sisters. The maintenance loan is hers not ours.

mumeeee Thu 03-Oct-13 21:58:30

I forgot to say that DD3's will have around £64 a week for food and all other costs.

eatyourveg Thu 03-Oct-13 22:03:57

snowyowl70 We calculated the amount we would be expected to contribute was the difference between the amount of loan ds gets and the total amount available ie loan and grant for a student whose parents have no income. You can find the figures on the loan calculator thingy - just put in an income of £0 the figures don't start changing until you get to £15K iirc

Doilooklikeatourist Thu 03-Oct-13 22:09:53

DS has the maintenance loan , and a small grant ( £700 )
He pays his accommodation from that , his Grandparents gave him £250 , and we have saved £1200 for each year
He has done himself a budget , and has asked if we can send him £20 a week ( phone bill , oyster card , food ) as he thinks he then has £58 a week to live on
Considering how our food bills have gone down since he's moved out , this is a bargain !

madeofkent Thu 03-Oct-13 22:33:52

My son applied late and we had to make him apply for as much as he could get. He ended up at Cambridge where the living costs are dreadful, he had to go into private halls costing literally twice as much as anywhere else. At one point because we were going to have to pay about £300 a month of his rent we thought he was going to have to busk to eat! He got a bursary last week which pays for all his books, and his grandparents have kindly set up £15 a week to be paid into his account and I am giving him £100 a month. For the next few years all birthday and xmas presents will be cash and all his clothes will come from Ebay. He manages to go out by going without meat, he can cook and loves meat but knows how to make lentils appetising, so he won't starve.

I agree about the food bills going down, I am thinking I could probably give him more money from the household food allowance. I don't think i fully appreciated how much he ate before.

LetsFaceTheMusicAndDance Thu 03-Oct-13 22:34:10

eatyourveg did you also add in the bursaries that most unis seem to give students who qualify for the maximum maintainance loan?

mumeeee Thu 03-Oct-13 22:50:35

We put money into ISA's when the girls were still young especially to use for their university costs. So that's how we could pay for accommodation. DD3's halls are actually cheaper than DD2's were but she is in Bolton and DD2 was in Kingston.

eatyourveg Fri 04-Oct-13 08:04:45

letsfacethemusic No I didn't as they vary so much - just factored in what sfe would pay out. Like others on here ds has been lucky that his grandparents are helping out and are paying 80% of his accommodation costs

Notsoskinnyminny Fri 04-Oct-13 18:57:30

I changed jobs last year when I knew DD would have to go away to do the course she wanted so I could afford to pay her accommodation as I stupidly remarried a lovely man who will continue to pay maintenance until his son graduates. Unfortunately for my DCs this isn't taken into consideration by the SLC when calculating their entitlement and they only get the minimum loan.

Annoyingly his Ex-W earns considerably more than me but tells everyone she's getting part of her salary as a cash payment so DSS is entitled to a grant and bursary on top of the £500 DH now pays directly to him as he's living in uni halls.

Thankfully DS is a homebird and lived at home and DD is sensible with money but with hindsight I should've stayed single until they'd both graduated.

Chopchopbusybusy Fri 04-Oct-13 19:13:40

DD has the minimum maintenance loan. Her halls are relatively cheap at £3700 so the loan just covers that. We have given her an allowance of £400 per month to pay for everything else. She worked during the summer and saved most of what she earned. Her course has a heavy workload but I have suggested that she try to get some occasional casual work. I'll be expecting her to work next summer.
I'm not looking forward to the two year overlap when DD2 starts!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now