I first became passionate about writing books for children after becoming a mum for the first time. Just over two years ago, I began to feel an overwhelming sense of responsibility to teach my son to believe in equality, and to ensure I instill in him an understanding that regardless of race, religion, gender or class, everyone should have access to the same opportunities. Then, earlier this year, another experience shook me to my core - the tragic suicide of my younger sister, who suffered from mental illness, at the age of 28. Together, these two personal experiences are the impetus for my Sophie Says book series.
My sister Rebecca was the most kind and beautiful soul that anyone has ever met. Always thinking of others - an exceptionally talented artist, and extremely intelligent to boot. She qualified as a doctor even while going through internal turmoil and suffering with bipolar disorder. Her life for the six years before we lost her consisted of periodical stints in NHS mental health hospitals. Throughout those stays, the NHS staff were phenomenal. Mental health wards can be harrowing places. I say that from personal experience (after spending so much time there with my sister). On the face of it, the wards are scary. There are constant screams and sobbing. There is also an element of danger, as you do not know when a patient will suddenly lose control and what they might do. But when you spend so much time in these wards you get to know the patients in there for who they really are - and they are wonderful people, scared and vulnerable, and trying to make their way through deep pain and suffering.
When I took my sister to A&E for the first time, they explained that as I lived in a different area to my parents, they couldn’t admit Rebecca, because the hospital Trust was not the nearest to the address on her notes. This angered me so much - would any other acute medical condition get treated like this? It took me five days (and it would have been longer If I didn’t call multiple times a day) to get Rebecca into a hospital so she could receive the care she needed. During those five days at home with me she was in an extremely fragile state, going through a psychotic episode, something a family member can never prepare themselves to watch while being the one responsible to administer her incredibly strong medication. It has been an incredibly steep learning curve for me and I know that for the rest of my life I will spend every day trying to eradicate the stigma of mental illness and teaching children from a young age the importance of paying attention to mental health.
A recent study* found that 80% of parents believe that mental health is an important topic that should be addressed in children’s books, and yet two-thirds of parents do not own a book which does. Children’s social awareness and emotions develop from as early as 18 months. Many people are not comfortable with speaking about their emotions, so many parents will naturally be worried or anxious about bringing this topic up with their children. They will be worried about whether talking about mental health may make their child more upset or anxious. That is why it's vitally important that there are children’s books which provide a toolkit for parents. Books that can be read with children to help create a safe environment talk about their feelings. If parents can talk to children about this and get their children to talk openly and honestly it will help them build resilience, build self-confidence, make relationships stronger, help them learn about other people and in the long run with more people talking about feelings it will help reduce the stigma.
There has never been a more important time to speak to our children about feelings and the importance of mental health. With the effects of COVID not fully known anxiety and worry has increased in the overall population. If we are not speaking to our children about their worries and reiterating the message that it is okay to have worries and speak about them openly, I fear it will have a detrimental effect on the next generation’s mental health. If we are not careful, mental illness will be the next pandemic we will be trying to combat.
You can buy Sophie Says Series here and follow Sophie Says on Instagram @sophiesaysofficial
*Survey of 1,000 UK parents conducted independently by Snap Consulting
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Guest post: “There has never been a more important time to speak to our children about feelings and the importance of mental health”
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MumsnetGuestPosts · 08/12/2020 11:22
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