Before Workfest 2015, I was angry and unhappy at work. I'd worked for 14 years as a senior sexual abuse counsellor for children and young people. The job was comfortable, until the work demands created an environment of discontent. My moods were so bad my daughters began to complain about the eggshell atmosphere; my husband was so worried about my health and emotional wellbeing he told me to quit. In the end, work became so stressful I was hospitalised. I was burnt out.
The risk of leaving seemed overwhelming. I craved something new, but I feared losing my steady income. In the back of my mind I kept thinking, "Who wants what I have to offer?" I was scared of not being good enough. At 55, I'd spent so many years hiding behind my children or filling my time investing in others. I'd served the needs of young people seeking counsel, support or a place of refuge for 20 years.
I think there is a battle between the desire to fully invest in your children, and to pursue your career goals. When I was working while my children were young, I desperately wanted to be a stay-at-home mum. I hated someone else telling me about my daughter's first steps; I didn't enjoy waking my children up early to take them to nursery; I dreaded hearing my youngest scream as I left. I feared the prospect of taking time off when my children were ill and resented the fact my employers didn't appear to care about my children’s welfare. I would have preferred to be my own boss, but I was paralysed. I hid my dreams, and focused on my children’s instead. I dodged opportunities, my fear of getting it wrong preventing me from taking risks at all. As time passed I started using my age as another excuse.
It wasn't until I attended Workfest, purely by chance, that I realised the extent of my hidden ambitions. I considered myself a good counsellor, one passionate about empowering others but, somehow, I'd never managed to empower myself to follow my dreams. From the outset, I was blown away and greatly inspired. The dreams I'd been too afraid the act on started to surface.
I had no more excuses. There I was, sitting in a room filled with energetic entrepreneurial mums, many doing what I wanted to do - being their own boss - and enjoying the journey. I felt encouraged and uplifted as I realised that it's never too late to start. I remember lifting up my hand, and stating that by Workfest 2016, my business would be up and running. I left buzzing, and felt that finally I had goals I wanted to achieve for myself.
After Workfest, I left my job, becoming a private practitioner so I could set up my business, Luminous Counselling. I continued my community work as both a mental health advocate and mentor. I enrolled on business training, found a business mentor, searched for an artist to develop some characters I'd created and established a focus group to gather feedback. I've been learning to network with likeminded people and re-vamped my workshop, 'Exploring Your Creativity Through Poetry'. I wrote a children's story and have many ideas for more. With a new lease of life, I also decluttered my house, lost weight and embraced a healthier approach towards my future.
The best thing is the knock-on effect: our family started a working group that meets monthly to share ideas, advice and support for each of our businesses. A number of women, inspired by my decision to give up a salary and branch out alone, are now moving toward fulfilling their goals.
I believe some women, including myself, suppress their potential to invest in their children. We don't realise we can have both. Workfest helps women figure out how you can balance children with your professional ambitions. It helped me to value myself and realise that I am good enough, I can do this, there is room for me. My goals to set up my own counselling service, develop a parenting safety teaching pack and become a writer are all achievable. I'm now my own boss – and I have no regrets.
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Guest posts
Guest post: "I spent decades dodging opportunities – now, I'm my own boss"
12 replies
MumsnetGuestPosts · 04/04/2016 15:21
OP posts:
SpaceKablooie ·
04/04/2016 18:27
I really enjoyed reading this. I'd love to work for myself, but my job (which I love) is only possible within a large organisation. Who knows what the future will bring though 
.
SpaceKablooie ·
05/04/2016 19:08
It doesn't say that the OP worked for the NHS, then started her own company offering services to the NHS though, does it 
? And even if she did, why is that specifically wrong?
I also don't see how every blog or whatever can be inspirational to every person in different circumstances 
.
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