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In despair!!

(15 Posts)
TrinaJ Wed 23-Mar-05 21:48:49

My maternity leave ends next week after having my second. I'm a nursery nurse, and was hoping to return to work part time and take the children with me, problem began when they only offered me 10 hours (what I left on) or full time, discovered I can't afford to put them both in full time, so I've ended up having to go back full time taking the children 3 days, working with a group i don't like and having to rely on mother and mother-in-law ( smoker/alcoholic!)two days a week but can't afford not to!!!!
At my wits end!! moral support deserately needed, verging on depression here!!!!!!!!!!

zippy539 Wed 23-Mar-05 22:00:26

Eek. Sound like a horrible situation, Trina. Don't have any fantastic advice but bumping for you cause someone will know what to suggest .

nic2004dave Wed 23-Mar-05 22:03:41

hi im a nursery nurse too its not easy working in a nursery i am 5 months pregnant and off work on the sick with anxiety because of the harrassment i was suffering from work about my pregnancy i can symphathise with you i dont plan on going back to work my husband doesnt want me to but i think i might get a part time job in tesco far as yur work is concerned i would contact acas and find out about parental flexible hours on 0870 474747

TrinaJ Thu 24-Mar-05 22:14:54

Thanks for your support. I hadn't intended to go back to work either, but money situation left me no choice, as you say tesco isn't really inspiring!! Flexible hours won't help unfortunately they haven't got any other available hours/postitions due to funds!
Still I shall return and keep my eyes open for something else more suitable.

hatsoff Thu 24-Mar-05 22:28:03

This makes me cross. Presumably if they offered you 10 hours or full-time, that means they need 50-odd hours of cover a week, split between two people. What difference does it make to them if they split it 10-40 or 25-25? If you're returning from maternity leave it's honestly worth exploring the flexible working thing, despite what they've said. I'm not that familiar with the legislation but you have the right to ask and they have to justify (in writing) why not. just saying thses are the only positions available may well not be enough of a justification.

hatsoff Thu 24-Mar-05 22:33:55

TrinaJ - can i ask you a question? Do people who work in nurseries get a discount if they use them for their own kids? I just don't really understand how a nursery nurse with children can afford to go back to work and am worried about a friend who is kind of in that situation but single too, and I have no idea how she's going to manage

TrinaJ Thu 24-Mar-05 22:48:02

Yes I get a discount, varies depending on nursery but believe me it does not cover two children.
I appreciate your help about the flexible hours, but what you have to realise is the nursery needs a certain number of staff to cover certain shifts, and the shifts that i would like to do are already covered, they now need flexible staff that can work full time hours within the nursery opening hours. They don't actually need someone to do 10 hours, they are obliged by law to offer me at least that as that is what i was contracted to work when i left!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAArg!!!!!!!!!!! It's so complicated but no amount of flexibilty would help in the full time position only in the 10 hours which is no use to me!!!

hatsoff Thu 24-Mar-05 22:53:37

ah - I can see that the issue of staff numbers etc complicates things - But it still makes me cross. I'm worried about my friend - she's pg with her second so I really don't know what she'll do. I wondered if she would do child-minding, as at least that way there's no child-care outlay but she's not keen. I really do think she's going to be frighteningly skint

TrinaJ Fri 25-Mar-05 08:47:05

I tried childminding last year but found it hard work otherwise i would have gone back to it. I didn't like being on my own all day or dealing with the tax etc.. But it was definately finacially beneficial, and there are some excellent childminding networks to join if you have the enthusiasm.
Tell your friend to give it a go if she likes the idea, just grin and bear it through the registartion process, once that's done it's not so bad!

MaryP0p1 Fri 25-Mar-05 08:52:57

Just a suggestion. Have you thought about approaching a childminding friend and working together rather than seperating.

Having worked as a childminder I know it can be quite isolating but at least this would solve your problem of isolating and have the additional benefit of parent shaving sick cover for you/partner.

P.S. I decided to give up childminder when my second came alone and it has taken me 2 yrs to find a job I like that suits me and my children and I have no support other than friends and my husband.. I know where your coming from.


ssd Fri 25-Mar-05 11:58:07

MeryPOp1, just curious. What did you find to do that you like now?

MaryP0p1 Fri 25-Mar-05 21:53:57

I work mornings only in a small pre school. I find pre schools tend to have older staff and more family friendly and can therefore understand your position better. The owners tend also to be less money orientated (IMHO).

I work five mornings but only pay for my DS1 (now 3) for 2 mornings. It works out about £16pw.

When I worked elsewhere I have paid my entire wages out. I have never had a discount from fees from anywhere I have worked. Plus I had the additional problems that if DS or DD (7) was sick knowing looks hinting I was skiving.

NannyJo Fri 25-Mar-05 21:58:06

Trina, what about looking at nannying doing after school care and taking children with you. You get much more money per hour so would have to do less hours than nursery and don't pay out for child care.

ssd Sat 26-Mar-05 10:33:32

MaryPop1, I didn't know you could do a job like that part days. Is it a teachers assistant or a playgroup leader?

ssd Sun 27-Mar-05 17:56:08


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