what would you make of this?(5 Posts)
i spent about an hour arguing with dh over a possible new job last night but i am still convinced that i am right. just because he wouldnt be happy with a job doesnt mean its not for me <he shy of proper hard work if you ask me>
i went for a work trial last night at a pizza shop and got paid £20 but i worked about 6 hours so thats not a lot really but the manager did explain that would be what i would be getting as it was just a trial. if he had gone through the job center and got some one off new deal he wouldnt have pay them a penny for 15 days if he took them on a work trial.
i was extremely tired and havent worked in a pizza shop since i was a fit and active 17 year old so i wasnt on my best form. plus the manager had different expectations to what i thought. i thought i would be counter staff he would like me to be involved with everything i.e. making all the food etc.
we have agreed to another work trial next week for the same pay which dh is not happy about. he thinks the manager is taking the piss. im not stupid this is the last 'trial' shift i will do. id expect to be paid full wage after that if im offered the position. but thats not really the issue here.
dh is unhappy with the amount of work i would be doing there when i could get a 'nice' job in call center and work just four hours a night <i hate call center work> and the shop stays open untill it is not busy anymore so i could be working till early hours of the morning sometimes. which dh is not happy about as he thinks it will impact on our family life. its only weekends. it would be friday, staurday and sunday evenings.
i think i should be able to choose what job i work in myself without having to feel like dh is having a go at me because he doesnt like the job.
You seem to be giving two messages here. One, that your DH is not happy because he is concerned the job will impact in a bad way on your family life (which is a reasonable concern) and two, that he just doesnt like the job (which is unreasonable).
I think when you are part of a family, it's only fair to discuss the pros and cons. Friday Sat and Sundday evenings till the early hours may be the right thing for your family (I am assuming you want to work when your |DH is home to avoid childcare costs etc?) But for some families it would be disaster. I certainly would rather put my kids with a CM and work during 'normal' work hours than do what you are doing, but that's what suits my family, yours may be different.
Maybe your DH is worried that if he works during the week and you are doing 3 weekend nights, you'll end up knackered and never seeing eachother? Sounds like you need to talk to eachother. The money may be not great in the pizza shop, but as I said, if you were working conventional hours you would probably be paying childcare, so even if you were on a better wage, you might have less money after costs IYSWIM. My friend has just started some evening work which appears on the surface to pay a pissy wage, but she actually has more in her pocket than another friend of ours who has a daytime job and two kids at nursery!
yes im hoping to work while dh is off work to care for the children. i think its the hours and the job itself that is bothering him.
he was okay with the hours untill he found out how much work i would be doing there and then he started having a go at me and would not listen when i said "but just because you wouldnt like that doesnt mean i wont"
Agree with Janey68. My dh as been offered a new job, which could be better for him, but it's further away and potentially longer hours, so could impact on childcare etc (I work too).
If it's just that your dh doesn't like the actual job, then that's unreasonable. But if it's more to do with the potential longer hours and the impact of that, that's a different matter. It could work fine, try and talk about it again.
Join the discussion
Please login first.