Advanced search

so unhappy - returning to work next week.

(12 Posts)
Nanoon Wed 10-Sep-08 09:54:57

I am really struggling with the thought of returning to work next Tuesday. I am going back three days a week and DS2 is now 9 months old and I am returning for the first time since his birth.

I am so sad - I feel like i am greiving for the lovely 9 months that we have had, i feel like i have blinked and the time has gone. Every day i reminded myself to appricate the time as i know how quickly it goes and i really have but i am so sad that the time is over.

Every time someone mentions me returning to work i have to fight back the tears. I know that i am going to be in prices next week. I have to take DS2 for settling in sessions at nursery, sort out my work wardrobe (!!), prepare DS1 birthday party all in the next couple of weeks and i fell i just can't cope.

I know i will have 2 days a week at home with both my sons but this is just not the same as i find looking after them both quite hard work as DS1 wants me to play with him all the time andcan be quite demanding and i feel i have so little time to give DS2. I am ashamed to say it but i do resent DS1 a little for this. DS1 behavour isn't the best at the minute as i know he is picking up on my sadness and anxiety and it is making me a horrible shouty mummy sad.

I like the people i work with but don't really enjoy my job and i am not that good at it either and feel i just bluff my way through. Good everything is such a mess.

Thank you for reading and sorry it is such a ramble, I can't even string a sentence together at the minute.

Please tell me i won't feel like this forever.

paow Wed 10-Sep-08 16:15:01

Hi there,
Just think how lucky yo are to be able to work part time and also think how much your ds2 will gain from going to nursery.
Even if you don't enjoy your job greatly, I'm sure eventually you will enjoy socialising with others and of course you will need to be very organised re: running the house, etc.
It's very normal to feel sad, give it a couple of months to get into swing.
For the first few weeks, I suggest lots of simple meals, etc to make it a bit easier.

Good luck!

Mine Thu 11-Sep-08 12:30:54

Nanoon i'm in the same boat, the only difference is that i only have 1 baby to leave behind.

I'm trying to be organised to make things less stressful for next week, but no matter how much i do, i still have to sit at a desk for 8 hours whilst i could be home playing with my beautiful boy.

The only thing that keeps me thinking positive thoughts is the extra money we will have so i can afford to do a lot more things with him on 'our' days together.

Do you work close to his nursery?? Will you be able to pop in to see him during the day..?

sparkletoes Thu 11-Sep-08 12:48:55

Oh Nanoon I was EXACTLY the same this time last year.

It DID pass, my DS loves his nursery (even asks to go on my non-working days!). It CAN work out just fine. Take it one day at a time and it might just surprise you. Nursery has been so good for my DS he has really come on leaps and bounds.

IF it doesn't work you may have consider other options but for now just enjoy the time you have left on maternity and wait and see how it goes... The first week is always going to be hardest but it won't always be like that.

OrangeKnickers Thu 11-Sep-08 13:06:55

good luck Nanoon. Getting super organised really helped me go back to work, but I was quite looking forward to it. I work four days a week.

Ds likes going to our cm and has really enjoyed being with the other children she has. My friend's kids are at the local nursery and after two weeks the kids are fine, and they enjoy it and learn loads from each other.

Treat the first two weeks that you are back at work like the first two weeks of having the baby! Lots of food in the freezer, meals planned, online shopping down, clothes ready and grab any help you can. I have a checklist for sunday evenings which helps.

You don't often hear it but it can be good! And it's good for your ds to see you working and bringing in the dosh (IMO)

sparkletoes Thu 11-Sep-08 13:17:32

Completely agree OrangeKnickers and treating it like the first 2 weeks with a baby is a really good way of handling it!

Good luck!

Nanoon Thu 11-Sep-08 13:47:30

thank you all so much for your lovely supportive messages. I know DS2 will be fine at nursery and DS1 is an outgoing, confident and bright little boy and i put alot of that down to the fact that he has been at nursery for 2 days a week since he was 6 months.

Its almost the waiting for next week to arrive which is the hardest part, i'm just going to miss our lovely time together so much aaagggggrrrrr sad

MINE - it makes me feel abit better knowing someone else is in the same boat, good luck to you for next week. We'll just have to look forward to their lovely smiley faces when we pick them up.


JuneBugJen Thu 11-Sep-08 13:50:57

Nanoon, good luck for next week.

I had this 4 weeks ago, back part time but still miss being part of the mummy loop and spening time with DCs even when they drove me mad.

My job is ok, but dont get that hurray I am at work feeling. Would love to be a SAHM but cant afford due to mortgage. It is getting better, I just shut off thoughts of DCs during day. which is probably what you will be able to do too.

Best wishes.

Nanoon Thu 11-Sep-08 13:56:22

thanks JBJ. Before i went on maternity leave i used ot joke that i went to work for a break from DS1!! i think during this 9 months off i have realised how lovely and easy (i am v lucky i know) having a young baby is and i have enjoyed every minute of it. As they get older it gets harder ime.

take care.

malu Thu 11-Sep-08 14:01:23

i did have a hard time when i got back to work 4 days a week, but to be honest it has worked out really well. My little girl goes to nursery and she loves it, shes come a long way and she is becoming more and more confident ( she is 21 months now) and me, i like the people i work with ( which always helps) and the job is easy enought not to get me stressed out which i dont need right now.

what im trying to say is that, even though i miss her loads, working has its possitive sides as well, appart from the money, little one gets to interact ans socialise on her own and i do get time to myself in a way.

every week i look forward to our monday together of mother and daugther and i love it!!

Feature Thu 11-Sep-08 14:03:14

I work the same hours as you and it is fine. Honestly!

Dc do make me feel a little guilty from time to time mostly the 4 year old one....

anniemac Thu 11-Sep-08 15:02:15

Message withdrawn

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now