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Returning to work soon ANY tips on dealing with the seperation factor??!!

(5 Posts)
wendi33 Wed 20-Aug-08 11:45:32

i return to full time work in october. we have found a great CM already. Does anyone have any tips or proven methods of dealing with the sepearation with the time comes?? how many weeks in advance should we start taking him to her to familiarise himself with her & vice versa?? anything I can do to make it easier for him?/ is he going to miss me or me miss him more??!
we have spent the last 10 months of each day together so I am really hoping it will be a easy and not to painful transition!!

madeindevon2 Wed 20-Aug-08 12:35:22

i started sending my son to nursery 1 day a week quite a while before i started work. (mainly because i went back to work quite a few months later than planned in the end)
i started full time work last week and so hes in nursery full time now. The transition from one day to 5 days a week seems to be easy for him. We havent had any tears yet. He waves and says byee sometimes and othertimes he looks a little confused when i drop him off(hes 14 months old) but im assured he settles straight away and is happy all day (he eats well which is a good sign)
its going to be YOU missing HIM far more than the other way around i suspect!

blueshoes Wed 20-Aug-08 13:10:53

My nursery has an 8 week settling in period, about 3 sessions per week, for babies who start fulltime. My ds, exclusively bf and poor sleeper, was around also around the same age as your dd when he started.

It started with an hour with me in the room. Then extended to 2 hours, then 3 hours. Then I would leave the room but hover out of sight in the waiting room. I had to back track at this point, was called back and had to re-start.

After about 2 weeks, ds could be left reliably without being upset for too long. And they upped the hours apart to around 5-6 hours. By the time he started, the transition was seamless.

The only thing the nursery had to work on, which was not sorted by the time ds started, was naps. The girls cuddled him and held him for the whole nap time until about 2 months down the road when he finally allowed himself to be put down for naps without waking and crying.

The CM would probably have her own ideas about the settling in period so do check with her. 8 weeks was great for ds but I suspect a bit too long for most CMs (the settling in sessions were free for me, BTW). If you feel the settling in period is too short, you can always pay her the full rate before you start work and use Sept and Oct as settling in period.

I did not miss ds much or dd for that matter (year long maternity leave in both cases). It was a relief to finally go back to pt work - difficult babies.

wendi33 Wed 20-Aug-08 20:50:52

Thanks we saw CM today & agreed on a 3 week settling in period. So I'm hoping he will be fine & feeling secure by then!
fingers crossed..

frazzledgirl Thu 21-Aug-08 08:30:39

We only had two settle sessions at DS's nursery, and then went to three half days a week.

He LOVES it. Cried the first day, but stopped considerably before I did and hasn't done so since.

He was 8 months, BTW, and the nursery is outstanding.

If you've found a great CM/nursery, then I think that counts for more than anything. It will be fine - good luck!

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