Difficult situation returning to work

(5 Posts)
Mitropa44 Sun 13-Dec-20 20:11:34

Hello, I need some advice. I recently went back to work. I’m a senior manager and I thought we had a very close team. Everything seemed to have changed and I felt that my team didn’t want me back. I had conversations with people to find out what happened but didn’t get anywhere. They all seem very close still but I feel excluded.

On my very first call back to work people didn’t even acknowledged that I returned after several months mat leave.

Ive been feeling rubbish every day and lost all my self confidence because of this.

Last week i couldn’t hold in any longer when 2 team members were obviously private messaging, grinning and nodding at each other during a team video call while I was talking.

I’d said that it made me feel uncomfortable. But now others also think they made me feel uncomfortable too.

Not sure how to move forward from here. I’m embarrassed that I snapped and don’t want to go to work on Monday at all.

Any useful advice please?

OP’s posts: |
Lurkingforawhile Sun 13-Dec-20 20:13:26

Sorry to hear that - have you been off for a while? I'm wondering whether covid has changed everything. Is everyone wfh now?

Mitropa44 Sun 13-Dec-20 20:15:38

Hi yes I’ve been off for 7 months and then covid happened. Wfh makes it even more difficult.
I also thought whether I’m being too sensitive... sad

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Lurkingforawhile Mon 14-Dec-20 08:19:38

I don’t think you are - sounds awful. I had a colleague return recently after a few months in a different team and welcomed them back on our team VC. It’s just polite. Maybe give it a couple of weeks to see if it settles down. Is it possible that something happened in the team while you were away (like a big row) and you don’t know about it. Is there anyone who was covering for you?

Mitropa44 Mon 14-Dec-20 08:54:45

Thank you, lurkingforawhile. I recruited a mat cover before I left and encouraged the team to learn as much as possible from this new person. My boss seems to think she has something to do with the change but I don’t want to speculate.. it would make the situation worse.

I did notice they found it hard to let her go.

I’ve lead this team for over 10 years and feel very upset how a few months can change years of trust and relationship.

I think I’m ready to look for a new opportunity elsewhere.

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