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Anxiety going through the roof!!!

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Emmalou90 Wed 19-Feb-20 19:16:21

Hi, i have a 10 year old daughter and I have an almost 9 month old daughter. My anxiety is through the roof at the moment and I honestly don't know what to do. My doctor has prescribed me some anti depression tablets but I've done that before and had CBT and Im not sure it's what's for the best. Basically I've been in the same job for almost 13 years and the people I worked with I had considered to be my second family. Baby was due in May 2018 and i had the most horrific back pain, I was signed off work in February 2019 and have been off ever since. I haven't heard from one person in my team. I didn't even get invited to the Christmas do even though I know that a lady I work with invited her daughter who doesn't even work there. I know it sounds silly but it's hurtful when I've not heard anything to ask how I am etc. I always struggle anyway to make the first move and I'm stuck in a loop of the longer it goes on the worse it gets. I had a letter from my manager when baby was 7 months old to congratulate me on her birth and to make contact to arrange a return date. I called and they asked me to go in for a meeting which I did, got my return date of 19th March with 2 days prior to get back in the swing of it. It was just awful getting in the bus on my own, I've not been anywhere on my own in the whole year I've had off. There's several new faces in the office and the people I knew now seem like strangers. My moods are really bad at the moment and I don't know what to do other than cry. I've not got the guilt of leaving my daughter to go back to work so it's not that holding me back it's just how I feel about myself and I guess I feel hurt and not good enough for anyone. I just need some help

OP’s posts: |
Black77Bird Fri 28-Feb-20 03:17:59

How long have you been on the anti-depressants? I ask, because they can sometimes take a few weeks to work, and can make you feel worse before you start to feel better. If you've been on them for more than a month and they're not working, ask to try something else. If you've been taking them for less than a couple of weeks, persevere ... and do not stop taking them.

It's hard going back to something that was so familiar, only to find that it's changed; what you're feeling is completely normal so don't beat yourself up about it.

With regard to the Christmas party, it could be that the other person was in frequent contact with people in the office, hence why they received an invite - if you're away, you're out of sight, out of mind for most. And maybe they assumed you wouldn't want to go?

Maybe you could consider a career change? Thirteen years is a long time to be in a job, and a change might be just what you need to get a new perspective on things?

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