Struggling/Failing

(19 Posts)
OutnumberedBy2 Wed 24-Apr-19 18:22:02

I feel like im struggling and failing as a wife and a mum. I've recently gone back to work full time. My children are only one & two so when we get them from nursery around 5 we have lots of play time then it's supper bath & bed. Im getting downstairs around 8pm and have no energy to then cook tea for us so we're eating alot of fast food which I hate but don't have the motivation or energy. I know a semi solution is slow cooker but my husband doesn't really like anything you can make in a slow cooker. When my boys get older will this change/ get easier 😥

OP’s posts: |
EjectorCrab Wed 24-Apr-19 18:24:24

What is your husband doing?

OutnumberedBy2 Wed 24-Apr-19 18:25:30

Working too. We work for his business and he has a new huge contract which means he's working harder and longer

OP’s posts: |
EjectorCrab Wed 24-Apr-19 18:26:28

Sorry that was very abrupt. If he is also playing, bathing, reading to the kids and also putting them to bed. Then you need to take it in turns to deal with the children, and cook dinner.

Loopytiles Wed 24-Apr-19 18:27:35

Those ages and working FT must be hard. Is your H sharing the domestic work and parenting?

Dividing your efforts can be a good approach. Or reduce playtime / bedtime with the DCs in order for one of you to sort out a healthier meal.

OutnumberedBy2 Wed 24-Apr-19 18:29:18

We kinda do that But instead of tea we tend to get the housework washing ironing ect done

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EjectorCrab Wed 24-Apr-19 18:30:29

Okay, so you are both working hard in the workplace and full time. You need to be equal in the home too.
Maybe at the weekend you could both do some batch cooking. You can then reheat during the week, along with the odd ready meal, takeaway it’s fine, you do what you’ve got to do.

Tour children are too young to entertain themselves much, it’ll get easier when they’re older. But while they’re eating, can one of you be preparing dinner for the grown ups, while the other sits with the children?

Shrewbie Wed 24-Apr-19 18:31:32

Eat at the same time as the kids.

Shrewbie Wed 24-Apr-19 18:33:06

Kids should just have a smaller portion of what you eat then it's one job lot.

EjectorCrab Wed 24-Apr-19 18:33:19

Also, do they need a bath every night (never bathed mine daily)?
Ironing and cleaning aren’t as important as eating.
Leave ironing and cleaning until the weekend, consider employing someone to do it for you if finances allow.

OutnumberedBy2 Wed 24-Apr-19 18:36:45

The boys have tea in nursery. Before I went full time we were eating with the boys but as they've had a tea and only need a supper we aren't cooking half as much as we used to

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OutnumberedBy2 Wed 24-Apr-19 18:39:05

Ejectorcrab we are going to look at hiring a cleaner. we are just waiting to see what we have left over as our nursery fees have got a lot higher so just need a couple weeks to get used to it

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Mumof1andacat Wed 24-Apr-19 18:40:13

What is your dh doing while you are doing bedtime? Does he get home at 8pm?

Loopytiles Wed 24-Apr-19 18:41:25

Suggest prioritising food over cleaning. Definitely hire a cleaner.

We don’t iron anything but workwear (office jobs).

OutnumberedBy2 Wed 24-Apr-19 18:41:48

He cleans up makes lunches and does paperwork for the next day at work xx

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FindYourCentre Wed 24-Apr-19 18:43:44

Batch cooking! All the way! We have 4 different meals in our freezer (shepherds pie, chilli, meatballs & veggie stew) just made 5 (2 person) portions of tomato pasta sauce today, 4 of which will go in the freezer. If you can make a batch every weekend you'll start to build a variety in the freezer (as opposed to eating the same thing for 5 nights!) Also if your DH doesn't like slow cooker recipes, what's his suggestion? It doesn't just fall on you, you know

OutnumberedBy2 Wed 24-Apr-19 18:59:00

I will try batch cooking only problem is he prefers to eat chicken only

OP’s posts: |
EjectorCrab Wed 24-Apr-19 19:01:43

You can reheat chicken.

EjectorCrab Wed 24-Apr-19 19:04:50

Maybe meal planning would help? Chuck in some very quick simple meals like omelettes?

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