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Pregnant while on mat leave- apparently I "have some nerve"

(197 Posts)
thiskittenbarks Sat 23-Sep-17 09:03:38

Coming to end of my year of Mat leave and will be going back 3 days p/w. Have recently found out I am pregnant again. Wonderful news and couldn't be happier. Brought baby to see my parents this weekend and told them we are (fingers crossed) expecting no2. They are pleased but when discussing going back to work etc my mum dropped in that I "have some nerve" do go back from mat leave pregnant. Is it really that bad? Surely lots of people do it? I want to be prepared for telling work as I'm now not sure if I am telling them something terrible and shocking. My boss was actually pretty unpleasant to me while I was pregnant (just rude comments and questioning the regularity of antenatal appts etc) so I am fully prepared for that again - but I would like to know if I'm actually being crazy or unreasonable.
My mum was then questioning me about what work can do and whether they have to give me mat leave for this baby or if they can get out of it on account me be just being on mat leave. She's in her 70s and I know things were unfortunately different for her generation. But she's made me doubt whether I will even get mat leave, which I know is stupid.

headintheproverbial Sat 23-Sep-17 09:08:46

The important thing to remember is that you are lawfully entitled to do this and that your boss should NOT treat you less fairly as a result.

But as a human being and a manager yes I think I would secretly be a bit irritated by an employee for doing this. Of course wouldn't say anything or act out. It's not that common for people to have such a small age gap between kids either.

TittyGolightly Sat 23-Sep-17 09:13:03

Depending on your wages your 3 days per week may not be enough to entitle you to maternity pay/maternity allowance.

Trollspoopglitter Sat 23-Sep-17 09:14:11

Did you negotiate going to work part time or were you always part time? Because if you negotiated it, you do the job part time and then take another maternity leave, I'd be concerned you've made your position redundant. (And no, it's not illegal at all and most workplaces will be very careful doing it by the book because they know most people will run to tribunal)

thiskittenbarks Sat 23-Sep-17 09:16:09

Tittygo - I worked it out and it will, thankfully.

beekeeper17 Sat 23-Sep-17 09:16:17

I went back to work pregnant after mat leave a couple of months ago. Someone else in our company did the same thing last year so it's not that uncommon.

If you get enhanced maternity pay from your employer there may be a clause that you're only eligible for it if you're back for a certain length of time. If you're on SMP, just check if you'll earn enough in the qualifying weeks to get SMP again (if some of the qualifying weeks fall when you're on the unpaid bit of mat leave you may not be, but I think you could possibly apply for maternity allowance if that's the case).

Congratulations! What's your age gap going to be?

Moreisnnogedag Sat 23-Sep-17 09:16:21

As above legally you're entitled to do it but surely you can appreciate from a business point of view it is frustrating? I would be prepared for your boss to be less than thrilled and I certainly wouldn't go in there bouncing expecting smiles and congratulations.

GlitterGlue Sat 23-Sep-17 09:17:54

You're entitled to do it, and entitled to maternity leave, but I think you have to accept that it will cause additional disruption (and potentially expense) to your place of work and they will be (quietly) disgruntled by it.

You may not be entitled to anything above the statutory minimum pay or leave wise so will need to check your contract.

arsenalwatford Sat 23-Sep-17 09:18:56

It would irritate me to be honest. But I would be all smiles and ensure you had all your rights.

Josieannathe2nd Sat 23-Sep-17 09:19:11

From a business point of view I think it depends how many babies you are going to have, as to how annoying it is- obv legally you can. Sometimes if you're just having two then to have them close gets it over & done with. Either theyve hired someone to cover you and can just keep them on or they've got used to you not being there...

Bluntness100 Sat 23-Sep-17 09:19:55

Of course you can do it legally, from an employers perspective it's shit, they just have to keep on keeping on covering you and keep your role open for what can be up to two years. so two sides to this.

Afreshstartplease Sat 23-Sep-17 09:21:25

I know two people who have been pregnant at the end of mat leave and taken sick leave between to mat leave so didnt actually go back in work!

Only1scoop Sat 23-Sep-17 09:21:57

Legally it's all good

Potentially a real PITA for others

MaisyPops Sat 23-Sep-17 09:22:32

Like other posters I can see why they might be less than thrilled, but they should make sure you have your employment rights.

Your eligability for maternity pay may be affected.

Zebrasinpyjamas Sat 23-Sep-17 09:23:45

Some employers will be annoyed but others fine, ie the same as they can with first time mat leave. If you are going to be back for a very short time, it might even be easier as they can continue whatever cover arrangements they had the first time. (worth pointing out to them if it's helpful).
Ime returning from mat leave is just as disruptive as leaving. In a team environment they have to get used to the change both ways. If you are only going back 'temporarily' you might find it hard going through that process too. I found myself a bit excluded from mgmt conversations once they knew I was going on mat leave (but my boss was an idiot).
Is it worth going back full time for better mat pay too?
I don't think you are being unfair or immoral. Even a life long employee doesn't plan their family around work.

mintbiscuit Sat 23-Sep-17 09:24:29

But as a human being and a manager yes I think I would secretly be a bit irritated by an employee for doing this. Of course wouldn't say anything or act out.

This. I wanted a small gap between my last 2 dcs. I was back for 10 months at work between mat leaves (full time) but I still felt like I was taking the piss a bit.

Sallycinnamum Sat 23-Sep-17 09:25:27

I'd be prepared to get a less than happy reaction from your employers tbh.

This has happened a few times in various workplaces and it's always been viewed rightly or wrongly very negatively by managers.

BikeRunSki Sat 23-Sep-17 09:25:45

As a manager, people coming back from ML pg again didn't really bother me, particularly if they were only going to be back for a short time, as I could just extend their mat cover. One girl came back for 8 weeks.

thiskittenbarks Sat 23-Sep-17 09:25:47

Trollspoop, I negotiated it - I wouldn't have gone back at all if it had to be full time. Im not bothered at all if I am made redundant after baby 2. My commute is an hour and a half each way and my train costs me £550 per month and when you factor in nursery costs £600 p/m for just one baby - when there are two it will be totally unviable. Not to mention that going to work before baby wakes and getting home after baby is in bed it's really not that appealing long term.

trilbydoll Sat 23-Sep-17 09:26:53

In my experience, it doesn't matter how long you go back for, the second pregnancy is always greeted with 'X is pregnant AGAIN' so tbh you're better off getting it over and done with quickly!

Niccelia Sat 23-Sep-17 09:27:00

Legally it's fines

Morally....not so much

Niccelia Sat 23-Sep-17 09:27:52

Thiskitten, it doesn't sound like you plan to even go back? So why not just resign?

AgentProvocateur Sat 23-Sep-17 09:30:50

I agree that the morally correct thing to do would be resign if you e no intention of going back after no 2.

CalmanOnSpeeddial Sat 23-Sep-17 09:32:41

But if you're going to be back a work for 6 months or so, that will be a PITA because it would be ridiculously expensive to keep your maternity cover on - even if they haven't already found another job to go to, so employer will have to find another cover, in the strong suspicion that you won't come back at all after the second ML. It's a fact of life, but it's nobody's ideal situation.

Gorgosparta Sat 23-Sep-17 09:33:48

You still have all the legal protections and benefits.

But yes, in most places it pisses people off. You are still accruing holiday so unlikley to be back for long. As you will want to use those days and mat leave.

It can impact your working wgen you are back. You will be back 6-7 months and have all your holidays. I work in project managent and most of the big projects are 9-12 months. So you probably would not be given the lead on those as its eaiser, where possible, to give someone it who can take the lead for the whole project, counting in annual leave.

By the time you return from the second leave you will have potentially spent 5 months of 2.5 years in the office.

However the pissed feelings should never actually be shown and there needs to be good reasons, business reasons, to not give you work.

While you are entitled to do as you please, lots of businessese would be unhappy.

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