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Changing jobs whilst pregnant ... WWYD?

(10 Posts)
Zaberwocky Sun 26-Mar-17 19:19:16

Apologies if this is really long! I just really need some advice. I've tried to be vague-ish in places as it's quite an identifying situation.

I just found out I'm pregnant a few days ago, been trying for years, and really, really wanted. I want to be excited, but my job is just ruining it for me. It's awful, I cry Sunday-Monday and I just can't imagine the next 7-8 months in this job. And I'm wondering if I need to try to get my career back on track NOW, even if it does mean I lose out on SMP.

I have (had) a fairly well established career in Learning and Development, qualification, a few years of retail management experience, and then a few working in L&D roles with a good blend of being head office based and working in stores. Loved it, had never been happier.

I then married DH who is in the forces, decided to move in together and relocate. We moved a few months ago and there has been nothing even vaguely relevant for me to apply for within a two hour radius. Obviously I had to take anything I could get after a few weeks, and ended up in a horrendous office role. It's supposed to be admin, but I get maybe half an hour of work a day, sometimes a week, maximum. Done the usual, asked for more work, responsibility, to get involved in projects and assist other departments (huge organization) but they really don't care! They say as long as my work is done, that's all I need to do. I'm bored to tears, my colleagues are horrible and backstabbing (out of boredom I guess) I fill my days with doing bits for my volunteering job, but I just don't feel fulfilled, and it's a horrible, toxic environment.

I've been trying to stick to my 'area', and applied for jobs I'm qualified for. I applied for one, and have had one interview, there's been nothing else in L&D or HR around here. They rejected me based on the fact they wanted a more 'general HR person' so I took this on board and have started a CIPD level 3 course in HR. I've also found a lovely volunteer position with a charity writing their job descriptions and sitting in on interviews. I'm doing everything I can to try to get out of this job. I check job sites daily, am signed up with recruitment agencies, but jobs just seem few and far between around here.

So long story short, I'm wondering if I should just be applying for anything nearby. Obviously I know whilst pregnant doing a 2 hour there and back commute probably isn't advisable, so I've narrowed down my search to within half an hour. There are a few retail management jobs I could try to go for, but other than that, it's all manual labor jobs which I'm not qualified for. I'm wondering if that's a better option rather than staying put and being really sad throughout my pregnancy, or if I should stick it out, or if anyone has any other better suggestions?

However, I will be moving again during my maternity leave (presuming everything goes well) so I will not be returning to my old/any new job. I'm just so sad and confused, I just don't know what I should be doing. I think I can see sticking it out at my current job is the sensible option, and there's no guarantee I'd get another job soon anyway,

So I guess, should I keep trying to get into any job I can, hold out for something in HR/L&D or stay put till I go on maternity leave?

Zaberwocky Mon 27-Mar-17 07:26:47

I'm sorry that was so long, but any words of wisdom would really be appreciated.

Badgertastic Mon 27-Mar-17 07:36:42

That is a difficult situation. If it was me, I would move to a different job during your pregnancy, even a temp one, just to qualify for maternity payments, which has less office backstabbing and more work to keep you occupied, or keep looking for jobs in your specialist area, however with you moving during maternity leave it would be a very short stint on your CV. You could even move to temp jobs and continue your search for your dream job whilst temping. Your happiness is the most important thing. Life is too short to be unhappy for 8 hours a day. Good luck.

abeandhalo Mon 27-Mar-17 08:04:40

I was applying for new jobs when I found out I was pregnant and I found it very hard in the first few months to accept I was now stuck there for the rest of the pregnancy.

But it went fairly quickly, after a few months I could see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I just didn't feel right messing another company around and applying for work there when I'd be on leave after a few months, I didn't think anyone would employ me to be honest. Plus I didn't want the stress of a new job on top of the pregnancy - although I appreciate if you're stressed by your current job it's probably no better.

My advice having been in that situation is to sit it out and take your leave as early as possible!

Zaberwocky Mon 27-Mar-17 08:28:41

I have looked at temping sad there's nothing locally, and nothing I'm qualified for. Not even temping in admin, or in support worker roles. A few agencies have kept my CV on file, and I email occasionally to check in, but nothing suitable has come up. It's so disheartening.

I feel guilty about only giving a new company 7-8 months... but by the same token, what am I supposed to do if I'm made redundant anyway?

I just hate myself for even getting into this situation in the first place. I've taken the plunge and applied for a few jobs, I've only been here 26 minutes and it's already horrendous. I just can't imagine it's good for the baby if I'm anxious, stressed and depressed for the next few months.

Thank you both so much for replying, it's just so hard knowing what the 'right' thing to do is.

LillyLollyLandy Mon 27-Mar-17 09:12:11

If you can't find another job as it is, how do you know you'll find one if you resign? Assuming you need your salary, I think I'd try and stick it out for a few more months and then go on mat leave early. It's possibly better the devil you know in this situation?

Zaberwocky Mon 27-Mar-17 09:16:12

Sorry for the confusion - I won't resign without another job to go to! Aside from needing the money, I do really like working. It's more a question of should I stay put and have a miserable pregnancy with the constant threat of redundancy... or try to find something else to tide me over for a few months.

I just can't believe I'm only an hour into the day sad

LillyLollyLandy Mon 27-Mar-17 09:29:41

Definitely look for another job then. Good luck!

Zaberwocky Mon 27-Mar-17 11:25:01

I think that's what I'm going to do. There's no harm in seeing what's out there. I'll probably do my usual omission about moving in the new year 😪... It's frustrating how the second employers know you're married to someone in the forces, they aren't interested. I hate being so dishonest, but what am I supposed to do? Not work for the next 12 years?

abeandhalo Mon 27-Mar-17 12:51:28

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time, I ended up getting signed off with stress about 4 months in to my pregnancy as I felt so awful going to work when it was so bad and I knew the stress wasn't doing the baby any good. After a few days break I felt a lot better and had more clarity, so maybe that might be something you need to do, especially if it's causing high blood pressure, etc.

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