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Returning to work after ML

(3 Posts)
FantasticMrsFoxx Wed 19-Nov-14 21:24:01

I'm looking for some feedback from working mums on returning to work after ML.
My HR dept is sh't but senior management have given them a kicking and they've organised a fabulous (on paper) person to cover my ML. I should be grateful they are so organised as my team have been in tears about me leaving (dunno why cos I can be a bit of a demanding cow, and I'm coming back in 9 months, geez!).
I actually have a 2 week handover period (again in shock at the sudden efficiency of HR) but I'm being stupid and am worried that this person is going to be so much better than me at doing my job.
I've planned out a whole 6 months worth of work for my team so they can really just 'press the button' and sit back as most things will run themselves. I guess it's a 'control' thing on my part which I need to resolve.
How did you find going back to work after ML when someone had been covering your role?

cdwales Thu 20-Nov-14 20:36:40

Hi, I did this twice but only took my 5 months statutory ML - the mortgage needed our two salaries. It is impossible to predict as there are all sorts of variables. Frankly there is absolutely no point in thinking about it at this stage. For a start you have more important things on which to focus - like helping your brain/body with the amazing thing you are about to do!
But no doubt you will email your colleagues with the birth announcement and perhaps after 6 to 8 weeks you might make contact again.
Honestly I can't even remember who covered for me and there are always reasons why people move in and out of roles. What I did learn though was that my two perforce started day nursery full time aged 5 1/2 months and loved it from the word go - the first few days they were agog and tired of course. After sitting up at 4m my DS was a bit bored with just me I suspect. His sister just wanted to follow wherever her big brother went - he went part time when I was on maternity leave with my second - two days a week I think. What the professionals and baby books still do not tell parents is that separation anxiety kicks in as a developmental stage aged 7 months so it is much kinder to start them even a morning a week at nursery before they are 7 months as seeing the distress of a few was not nice - though some did stop crying as soon as Mum/Dad had left! Mine always ran in all keen without a kiss or second thought in the morning and ran out showing off what they had done in the evening.
Erm, you will probably find that work has rather less importance in your life...though still vital I found! All the best. smile

matildasengineermum Tue 25-Nov-14 21:32:16

I found it really hard being away from work, after being so in demand at work it was hard to be at home with a baby and I had PND.

However on returning to work I felt much better. DD was 6 months old when I first went back, I slowly ramped up my number of hours per week so that I could get the hang of it (using KIT days and then annual leave) and my PND started to get better around that time. I have now been working 4 days a week for nearly a year and love it! All my days with my little girl are precious and I have enough of my old life back to feel like me. It is hard to manage sometimes but it is worth it.

Also, I had the same experience as cdwales; DD has never really caused a fuss about me going to work, although she is always pleased to see me and shows me what she is playing with when I come to collect her. I don't know if this is just her nature or whether it is because I returned to work when she was young, but it seems to work.

DD has one day with my mum, one day with my MIL and two days with her childminder and she seems happy with this. The large team of childcarers also means that I usually have someone to cover for one of them being ill or away on holiday so that I can save annual leave for our family holidays.

Work wise, although I am not as available as I used to be, I really do think I am more effective now that I am a mum, because every minute counts and I don't stress about things like I used to. So hopefully you will feel the same.

I didn't really have someone covering for me, I just handed my projects over to various people. I haven't really felt that anyone compares me with the people who looked after my projects. Mostly my bosses just seem pleased that I took the time to properly brief people before I left. If you have done your best then people should recognise that much of the smooth transition was down to you!

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