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I jut don't think going back to work full time is going to work

31 replies

jojane · 20/03/2014 10:48

I currently work fri and sat nights in a busy badly run resturant. Had an interview last Friday for a full time job, min wage, ok job. Should hear back tomorrow, probably havnt got it anyway but after doing as many different scenarios with different shifts, different types of childcare etc for 2 school age kids and 1 playschool age kids I have come to the conclusion that
I won't be bringing home any more than I am now
Weekends will be spent doing swimming lessons, ballet, reading, maths homework, etc that we currently do after school
Kids will not be ablt to have playdates
Weekends will also be spent cleaning, batch cooking, popping to bank/post office/buying birthday presents etc etc that I currently do in the week
Will need to use up lots of holiday for attending patents meetings, school plays, playschool days out where parents are needed to take them, kids illness, consultant appts, physio appts, inset days, sports days etc etc
School holidays are going to be a nightmare to sort out care for for school age kids

I just don't see how people do it? Do they have much better paid jobs so can afford cleaners/ nannies to do it all for them?

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Tiredemma · 20/03/2014 10:51

Do they have much better paid jobs so can afford cleaners/ nannies to do it all for them?

No. To be honest its chaos- and every weekend is about laundry, shopping, taking kids to their clubs, batch cooking.............

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dashoflime · 20/03/2014 10:51

I'd totally understand if you didn't feel you could do it. It does sound like a lot of stress for little reward.

Have you checked you tax credit entitlement though- that might make a difference.

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craftynclothy · 20/03/2014 10:53

Wrt childcare for the school aged children, does the school have a breakfast/afterschool club? I know ours does and it's cheaper than childminder/nursery. They also do full days during the school holidays, again cheaper than childminder/nursery.

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jojane · 20/03/2014 10:53

Yes that is including tax credit help with childcare, without it I would be paying £500 for the privilege of going to work!

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dashoflime · 20/03/2014 10:55

I just don't see how people do it? Do they have much better paid jobs so can afford cleaners/ nannies to do it all for them?

Using mumsnet as a benchmark (always a bad idea I know!), full time working mums seem to be more common among middle income women.

Lower paid women run into the same problems your facing and rich women are able to make a lifestyle choice to stay home.

Not saying it applied to everyone- that's just what I've observed on here

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dashoflime · 20/03/2014 10:56

Yes that is including tax credit help with childcare, without it I would be paying £500 for the privilege of going to work!

Ah crap, that's really rubbish Sad

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jojane · 20/03/2014 10:57

Yes my scenarios are based on free breakfast club and paying for after school club. They only do one week in the summer holidays, local leisure centre does play scheme in summer holidays but only school hours so would still need childcare for before and after that for them.
I have done scenarios on using private nursery, childminders, after school club, nanny, working slightly less hours, working 4 days etc etc and there's only about £100 difference between them all.

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purplebaubles · 20/03/2014 11:00

If I go back full time I would earn £1300.

Childcare full time for 2 kids would be £1600.

Seriously. What's the point!

Whichever way you look at it, I think to go back full time you need to be on decent £2.5k a month take home pay, or else it's just not worth it imo.

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jojane · 20/03/2014 11:01

Kids go to a very affluent school so most of the mums I know either have very well paid jobs - solicitors, heart surgeons, business managers etc etc or have very rich husbands so they can afford to stay at home. The ones that are 'normal' like us have grandparents providing free childcare and admit they wouldn't be able to afford it otherwise

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EuroMaidan · 20/03/2014 11:03

On minimum wage I agree it's hardly worth it. Don't forget that you will also be spending more on a daily basis because of how little time you will have for shopping and housework. I think people do it either because they are hoping to progress their career and earn more in the near future, or because they want to keep the job and still have it when children are older and full-time job is no longer such a big strain.

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jojane · 20/03/2014 11:05

There are no part time jobs anymore and the ones you find say you must be available between 7am and 7pm 7 days a week for what ever shifts they deem to give you! or are 6-9am cleaning, I would not mind cleaning but the hours are either before or after school at times it's impossible to get childcare for.
I would love a 9-3pm job doing admin or the such, wouldn't need a lunch break so would only be doing an hour less a day and would probably work harder than some 20 something working full time, coming in hungover, face booking half the afternoon and doing nothing for the last half hour!!!
I'm not stupid, I got A s at A level and did half an accountancy degree at uni.

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EuroMaidan · 20/03/2014 11:07

Also, you're not saying what an 'ok' job means. Is it ok in the sense that it's not too stressful and can be done, or ok in the sense that it helps you develop new and interesting skills to an 'ok' extent?

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TeacakeEater · 20/03/2014 11:11

Re no-part time jobs jojane, my student niece found the same thing at a supermarket she had worked for, all part-timers let go, only new jobs available were for anytime availability.

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Viviennemary · 20/03/2014 11:15

In your position I would stick to the restaurant job for the time being. At least your money is your own and not constantly being paid out to childminders. This is fine if you're earning more but hopeless if you are not.

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TeacakeEater · 20/03/2014 11:22

Any busy daytime cafes in your area? I spot a parent of school aged kids I know doing this.

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jojane · 20/03/2014 11:25

Ok job - I mean something I would enjoy doing, but no promotion prospects, or job perks but varied and more interesting than cleaning or checkout.

Reason I am looking for a different job is the resturant is so badly run, we are very short staffed, they keep saying they are going to have to shut down, work is really stressful. Ie last week I said to owner did we have enough beer barrels for upstairs resturant. No was the reply I didn't get another one so we will have to make do. 4 pints later beer runs out which means I have to run up and down stairs to the downstairs bar every time someone orders a beer which in a curry house is most orders. This is on top of answering the phone which goes non stop, taking payments, adding up bills (all manually, no computer system)'etc etc.
The weekend before there was a staff problem in the kitchen, no food was being cooked and people were waiting 2+ hours for food, most people walked out or refused to pay for thier food.
I have been in bed with tonsillitis since Sunday and most weeks it takes me til about Wednesday to recover from the stress of the weekend.
I don't get holiday pay and if I boom a night off they panic they won't cope without me and hassle me for weeks to change my night off
And breathe ....

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moralimbecile · 22/03/2014 14:20

You are entitled to holiday pay, phone acas or cab to check how you can retrieve any payment for unpaid holiday you have taken. That is awful.

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bunnysmummy · 22/03/2014 19:27

I think you're right JoJane, full time isn't going to work for you.

You mentioned you got half way through an accountancy degree, could you do some bookkeeping? Perhaps doing the books for small businesses or for accountants who often farm out this work. You could work it around the children.

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expatinscotland · 22/03/2014 19:44

Doesn't sound worth it.

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CointreauVersial · 22/03/2014 19:50

Promotion prospects....

Pay rises (hopefully!).....

Kids get older every year and need less childcare.....

Honestly, it might well not feel like it's worth it at the start, but getting a decent job is investing in your future. It gets easier and easier. You find a way around things. And it doesn't sound like your current job is worth sticking around for.

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moralimbecile · 22/03/2014 19:52

Restart your degree. Ou are great, and working part time would enable you to do this, unlike a full time dead end job which will ultimately choke your chances. If you don't want to continue that degree, ou will give you credit transfer for what study you have done, even though incomplete ?

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moralimbecile · 22/03/2014 20:01

And you'll get fee waiver if earnings are low :-) ?

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rookiemater · 22/03/2014 20:04

Don't forget lots of people have family help as well which makes life a lot easier (we don't).
I can't see the point of you taking this f/t job, unless it's a stepping block for something else. I have a p/t job which mostly works round DS's school hours, but I only have it because I went back p/t after mat leave and then have renegotiated my hours further down the line.

We only have one DS and I don't quite know how we'd manage if I was f/t, although I'm sure we would if we had to.

Why don't you focus your efforts on finding a better weekend job - there must be other bars or restaurants out there? Or, something I considered when my job looked unstable, is getting CRB checked and doing babysitting for hotels or holiday rentals. The hourly rate isn't bad at all and it would be a lot less stressful than your description of your current job.

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rookiemater · 22/03/2014 20:05

Oh yes and finishing your accountancy degree if you can - have read stories about mums who do well from doing the books for small businesses from home.

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jojane · 25/03/2014 16:32

Well I got the job! But they have agreed to a job share so I will be doing 16 hours a week, flexible so can work it around school runs, sports days, inset days etc and as not very many hours outside of playschool in laws have agreed to pick up the slack when I need childcare.

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