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Up the creek without a paddle

(7 Posts)
Kafri Mon 06-May-13 20:28:20

Hi

Am due to return to work after Maternity in Summer but have just been told that I cannot return to me job part time.
I don't want to return full time and even if I did, I really don't earn enough to pay full time child care. I have childcare for 1 day and was going to look at a childminder for 1 day which should have allowed me to earn enough to make up DH wage to live on while DS is so young. I'd rather live without luxuries and spend time with DS than earn a full time wage but never see him from week to week. (and i'd actually earn less due to how much I would pay in childcare.)

Anyway - part time is not an option - I got the 'it doesn't fit the needs of the business' line so i'm up the creek without a paddle.

I either have to return full time and miss my son growing up (yes I know, others have to do it/others choose to do it etc) or I need to find a part time job for 2 days a week rather sharpish. (which isn't the easiest thing in the wold on today's climate)

It just doesn't seem fair that an employer that I have given a hell of a lot of my life to can simply just say nope, we can't reduce your hours while you raise a child. It just comes across as sexist.

I have no idea what to do....

Any MN wisdom from people who've had the same problem?

chanie44 Mon 06-May-13 21:21:31

Well you can appeal the decision if you can demonstrate how you reducing your hours won't be detrimental to the business.

Other than that, I don't think it's unfair. Just because your needs have changed, it doesn't mean your employers needs can accommodate it.

Sorry of that sounds harsh, I am very pro-flexible working, but not when applicants focus on their own needs at the expense of the business and then complain 'its not fair'.

WipsGlitter Mon 06-May-13 21:24:01

We're you asking to go from five days to two? I can see why they wouldn't go for that tbh.

narmada Mon 06-May-13 21:24:58

Can your DP go part-time instead and do more childcare, or does that not work?

I think going back to work for a -ive amount of money is always a no-no unless you have good career prospects in that job. What a shit situation, but not unusual unfirtunately.v

Thurlow Mon 06-May-13 21:27:22

I think sadly a lot of employers can get away with this at the moment, because it genuinely isn't in their interests to have a p/t employee. I am f/t at the moment because there was no way my employer would let me go p/t and the industry is struggling, so there weren't any other jobs.

It does suck though, I do feel for you.

Is this a job in a chosen career? Would you want another job in the same sector (as in, do you want to go back f/t eventually when DCs are older) or would you be looking for any job p/t? If it is the latter, there could be other jobs, perhaps ones with a bit of shift work which is actually a lot easier to fit around childcare and a young DC, if one parent does shift work.

BikeRunSki Mon 06-May-13 21:37:23

Me, my friends and family have all done variations on:

Could you and your DH both go part time, say 4 days a week?
Could you find someone to jobshare with?
Could you work condensed hours (ie full time hours in fewer days a week)
Could you alternate a week of full time and a week of part time? (eight day fortnight)

Are you asking to work 2 days a week ? It's really not great. I have done it and have managed a couple of people who worked 2 days a week. You are always chasing your tail. Half a day is 25% of your time. If it's an officey type job, that means by the time you've caught up with what you've missed, you've had 25% of your time.

It's not sexist. Your needs have changed, your employers needs havn't. DH has had flexible working request turned down too!

Kafri Mon 06-May-13 22:07:25

employer is saying it's FT or nothing so I'll have to find something else.
its a big company that provides various health services but i happen to work in the education arm of it.

It is a job i love and will be sad to leave but ds has to come first. It's taken 6 years to have him so i don't want to miss out on everything I would miss if I went back ft.

shifts are difficult now as dh only gets home at 6 so I can't leave the house til he gets in. he works weekends on a rota (usually every other, sometimes more and then gets a day off in the week but its never the same day so useless for child care and not much use for me trying to work around him.

mil has made it clear she has no wish to provide childcare (which is fine but its a useful piece of info for anyone making suggestions)

my dm was willing to give up a days work to have him a day for me but she sadly passed away a few weeks back (very sudden and completely unexpected) - which is why I now need to look at child minders.

im just gonna have to scout around for any pt position offering 2 weekdays and keep fingers crossed something comes up.

please don't think I'm being awkward here - I've always worked evenings/weekends/days/nights etc but I can only work around dh and ds now.

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